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Showing content with the highest reputation on 01/14/19 in all areas
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'a Journey' is the philosophical way of looking at it. 'Shitty, empowering and highly challenging' is what I'd rather call it. If there's one thing I know after 145 days of being smoke free, it's that I. WILL. NEVER. EVER. PUT. MYSELF.THROUGH. THIS. CRAP. EVER. AGAIN. Crystal clear motivation. Quitting has had an effect on my relationships, my work, my daily rhytm, my everything. It's like I am reinventing myself, but not in a gradual, beautiful way. At some point the caterpillar seemed to evolve in something completely different than a colourful butterfly... The dust is still settling. I've come to some pretty sad but strengthening conclusions: I am capable of mourning and going to a funeral of someone I hold dear and not smoke. I can find myself in the middle of relationship crisis and still stand my ground. I found some consolation in staying true to myself, regarding my quit. I can deal with heavy panick attacks and remain without cigarettes . Anxiety seems to be diminishing by the way, but since that would be a glorious hallelujah and I am so afraid of disappointing myself with hope, for now I won't be focussing on that (but yeah. It is actually less of a daily base problem. Hoooly cow. Aaahhhhhh. Imagine if that pattern persists. I would get back part of my life). I discovered that I'm pretty much through with my job but I have to endure untill I find something else. Realisation of missing out on proper grown-up education hits harder than ever, now that I'm unable to dull these thoughts. But there's a tiny glimpse of something new: 'if I can do this, I may be capable of so much more'. Shitting seven colours... but looking in to re-educating. I am learning to dance my waltz with time. If quitting does one thing, it's messing with perspective. Since one month or so, I feel like I am regaining 3D view again. I am able to see depth once more and I am learning to be here now, without losing my horison. Next week will mark five months for me. I have many reasons to continue like I do. But one thought is most empowering: it's all in my hands!8 points
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NOPE.... Is it the 25th th already!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! just had to check...it's the 15th ?8 points
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Nope, Thought for the day: What you resist, persists. What you accept, transforms. I accept I am an addict, and I work towards transforming myself every day.7 points
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This is the smile of a nicotine free 6 day old !! for some reason my screen is dark can barely see what I am writing. sorry ?6 points
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@Linda ThomasI was imagining you at the hospital with your parents, which got me to thinking how smoking enabled me to remove myself from situations or people. I had to go outside for a smoke. Now, I just get to go outside and away from the cray to center myself and have nice breaths of oxygen. The smokey part is unnecessary but, taking a break with yourself is very necessary. So, take breaks by yourself. Go wash your face. Take the stairs up or down to work off some anxiety. Find a secret waiting room. They have a chapel. Take care of yourself.5 points
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Linda, sorry about your dad and the stress you are dealing with right now. In the time that you have been here, you've shown yourself to be strong and resilient. That helps a lot.3 points
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That’s some mighty fine self reflection MLMR, very encouraging. I, too, used the agony of quitting as motivation to stay quit. Hell no I’m never going through that again!!! Sound’s like you conquered some pretty big life stressors without smoking. That’s a big deal! Carry on...3 points
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I know this was an epiphany for me in my quit, The honesty that I showed myself in quitting, continues in every part of my life. I can trust myself and I am capable of anything I choose to do. After quitting the addiction, everything else is small potatoes, really. and, like you The victory is well earned and the benefits continue.3 points
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GREAT post MLMR, and you can bet it still will get better and better with time3 points
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You Don't Smoke Anymore.? With a resounding NOPE he replied ! I Do Not Smoke ! and it feels good, it is a Challange. We all face challenges in our lifes, its the way we face them that make the difference. just like this Kid, he;s been dueling with his Challemge all his life !3 points
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Absolutely made up with how my quit is moving along. Doing dry January, doing plenty of exercise and watching plenty of films and a little reading. All helping. Every time I get a small urge, because that's all they've been so far, I weigh that one little urge in time up against the time smoking has not even entered my mind and I feel empowered. Onwards and upwards people.3 points
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Going well. That is all. Haven't been posting much or using the daily nope pledge. I'm trying not to think about it as much this time. I became a bit too reliant on this place last time, beating myself up for missing nopes and stuff like that. I'll just keep popping in randomly over the coming months to let you know how I'm getting on. I pop in every now and again to watch videos posted by others aswell. They are most helpful as is reading some of the testimonies on here.2 points
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Good for you, MLMR....as time goes on things, things in your life will get even clearer and your quit even more empowering!?2 points
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So sorry to hear about your dad Linda. Try and get some sleep. Sounds like you are gonna have a busy day tomorrow. Prayers for your family.2 points
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