After reading i recognize the cycle. Its self destruction, after a long quit i have blown a good 10 quits this same way. I'd go 2-3 weeks boom have a couple of ciggs get to the point of a few months do it again. I also ventured into alcohol, my mindset was way off and i was in a bad place mentally. Each time i relapsed it was F-IT with the same physical and mental feeling after . There's is a lot of people like this so dont feel alone but when we as humans get self destructive its how we deal with fear. You moved over to coke and meth and i have never used them so i have 0 experience with those drugs. I would recommend you look into a meeting in your area, i know these forums are the easy way as some are shy and or embarrassed to go in person but you'll find support and understand why you have jumped into coke and meth. As far as the smoking, come here and when you hit that low self destructive point stop by and someone will be here for you to talk to and help you through that hurdle . The coke and meth ive seen people beg for help and they truly couldn't stop why i mention a meeting, you're very young with a lot of life ahead and we all make mistakes.