September 11, 201411 yr I'm not going to smoke. I'm going to go give my son a bath. then I'm going to put him to bed and then I'm going to bed too. Stupid, damn, nicotine and cigarettes. Thanks again everybody. Hoping you are feeling better - and took your own advice cos I know you know smoking won't help anything. You can do this and we all want to help - so I am glad you posted your SOS ... And if there is a next time - remember there are always gummy bears in times of an emergency !
September 11, 201411 yr Who Wants To Go Back To Smoking? This video discusses how former smokers at times think they want to go back to smoking, but if they really remind themselves of the package deal that goes along with being a smoker, it will be easy for them to stick to their quit. Holski, this video that MQ posted addresses the same points I was trying to make, only better. I viewed this some weeks ago and it really helped me. I hope it helps you, too. (Thanks much, MQ!)
September 11, 201411 yr When you're up to it you should write the reasons you don't want to smoke here. Sometimes writing things down can help to clear your thoughts. At least that works for me. Give it a try! http://www.quittrain.com/topic/259-pre-respond-to-your-own-sos/
September 11, 201411 yr Holly, hope you are sleeping peacefully, now. All one cigarette will do is make you want 100,000 more...please take your life back for you and your family!
September 11, 201411 yr Hope all is well now Holski and when you wake it will be a new and stronger day. x
September 11, 201411 yr Call the waaambulance. I am feeling like a special snowflake right now. I know better but I just feel like I will never get this. I feel like I'm missing out on something. Mind bleeeep is what this is. Course' if I keep relapsing, I will never get this. Alright, alright. I want to be like the lady in Beacons' post. The 70 year old healthy one. I hope you're better this morning. I'd tell that if you weren't to get your butt back here but I guess your reading this so you're already here. :) It sounds like you're fixating on a cigarette. I remember in the past when I would do this and since our minds our so powerful, when you fixate on something, especially something that you can easily have, it makes it very difficult to think about anything else. It's what we do as addicts when we want something that we know will lead us down a road we may never return from. It's not worth it. Hang on Holski, you'll get through this and at some point in the near future, you won't have to deal with such strong urges. Don't forget that you're coming up on 3 months and you know what that means. If not, watch below. Yep, you guessed it, a video from Joel's library which addresses fixating on a cigarette. Fixating On A Cigarette This video discusses how people often fixate on the desire to have "a good" cigarette. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OZLJ_nlkUCQ&list=PL4F05C03D0F9B86DB&index=42 The Terrible 3's This video discusses why people "may" have problems at three day and three month marks. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PTIr3UEez1w&list=PL4F05C03D0F9B86DB&index=11 Change Of Season Triggers - FALL Video discussed how change of season events and conditions may result in a temporary increase of thoughts for cigarettes. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ADlHtj7N8vo
September 11, 201411 yr Hi, Holski. I hear ya, buddy, and I feel your pain. Literally. I, too, am one of those people who periodically gets locked into obsessively thinking about and desiring to smoke a cigarette. The rational part of my brain says, "Absolutely not!!" but my junkie brain keeps bugging me and bugging me and bugging me until I'm ready to SCREAM!!. Frankly, I want to smoke not to relieve the cravings so much but to get relief from the constant mental battle. This doesn't happen to me all the time (thank God) but it does sometimes. So what do I do to get through it? 1. Recognize that there is something going on in my life that is making me particularly stressed or anxious. There is some emotion that is triggering my thoughts about smoking. It is important for me to look at myself honestly and figure out what is bothering me--then start taking steps to fix the problem. That, really, is the only long-term solution. 2. Take serious steps to reduce your stress. Getting regular, moderate exercise is particularly effective. Listen to relaxing music or do yoga or immerse yourself in a favorite hobby or listen to a self-hypnosis tape. Do whatever works for you to reduce your stress. 3. (This was a biggie for me) Recognize that you do NOT want to go back to smoking. You keep thinking about having "one perfect cigarette". Just one. You just crave the relief of that one, beautiful inhalation and the feeling of "a-a-a-h-h-h". Well, there ain't no such thing as "one perfect cigarette". One cigarette will lead to another and then 3 and then a pack and so on.... So your internal debate is not really between "should I have one cigarette or not?". Your internal debate is REALLY "should I keep my quit or throw in the towel and go back to smoking totally?" THAT is the real choice you have. Joel Spitzer said it in a way that really resonated with me. He said: "Fixating on a Cigarette What happens to some people is when off a certain time period they start fixating on a cigarette. By that I mean they forget all the bad cigarettes they ever smoked, they forget the ones they smoked without ever really thinking about them even at the time they were being smoked, and they start to remember and focus on one good cigarette. It may be one the smoked 20 years earlier but it was a good one and they are now wanting one again. A common tactic is the ex-smoker will try to tell himself or herself that he or she does not really want that good cigarette. Well, the problem is at that moment he or she does want it. An internal debate erupts, "I want one, no I don't, one sounds great, not it doesn't, oh just one, not just one!" The problem is that if the ex-smoker focus on one there is no clear winning side. The ex-smoker needs to change the internal discussion. Don't say that you don’t want one when you do, rather acknowledge the desire but ask yourself, do I want the others that go with it. Then do I want the package deal that goes with the others? The expense, social stigma, smell, health effects, possible loss of life. Do you want to go back to smoking, full fledged, until it cripples and kills you? Stated like this it normally is not a back and forth debate. The answer will normally be, "No I don’t want to smoke under these terms, and these are the only terms a cigarette comes with. Normally if viewed like this the debate is over with almost immediately after pulled into focus. Again, if the focus is only on one, you can drive yourself nuts throughout the whole day. If they focus on the whole package deal, you will walk away from the moment relieved to still be smoke free and sufficiently reinforced to never take another puff! Joel" So in summary, to stop obsessing about cigarettes identify and fix the underlying problem, practice stress reduction techniques every day and realize that yes, you want a cigarette right now. But you only want ONE SINGLE cigarette. There ain't no such thing. You are torturing yourself with a fantasy. Lastly, when I was really afraid that I was going to relapse, I re-started Chantix for a week or two. That calmed the obsessive thinking and allowed me to get grounded again. I suspect that any NRT that worked for you to help you quit (if you used one) would work to help you avoid a relapse. Hang in there. You and I (and some others) are fighting this same battle. We are going to win! And little by little it does get better and easier. Keep the Quit, baby! It´s not worth it Wow, I found both of these really helpful! Holski, I hope that you fell better today - do you think you could possible spend a little time here, with us? It seems that when you are away for a while, you get these feelings of 'romancing the cigarette'... Hug!
September 11, 201411 yr Your missing absolutely nothin..... It's your junkie mind....playin games with you..... Your smarter than that....no such thing as one..... You have a great quit going....stay strong....
September 11, 201411 yr stick with it holski the more you give thought to thinking you want one the more hell you will put yourself through and one of 2 things could happen 1 you will go through hell for a few days until mind set is back on track 2 you will relapse due to going through hell I only say this as i have been through number 1 a few times and it sucks ass but not as much as number 2 would have for me it was set off by emotions and stress crysalis explained it very well you just keep swimming you beautiful non smoking shark you xx
September 11, 201411 yr Today is a brand new beautiful day, much too beautiful to smoke yourself to an ugly and painful death. Where's the romance in THAT ? Stay in the NOPE, give yourself love, some NOPE love.
September 11, 201411 yr Call the waaambulance. I am feeling like a special snowflake right now. I know better but I just feel like I will never get this. I feel like I'm missing out on something. Mind bleeeep is what this is. Course' if I keep relapsing, I will never get this. Alright, alright. I want to be like the lady in Beacons' post. The 70 year old healthy one. You're not alone! 6 months here, and this month has been tougher than months 4 and 5 for some reason. Hubby in with heart attack, move from farm to town, etc. so I've chalked it up to changes and stress, but whatever the reason, it sucks. I want to be someone with no cravings and no memories of "good" smokes. Having said that. . . Cardiologist said husband's 2 heart attacks this month was the direct result of his smoking for 40 years. One stint later, and me (reluctantly) learning how to cook non wheat non sugar, husband's doing great. My intermittent craving for a cigarette seems to have diminished for the moment, anyway!! At first, I gave it a month; if I am still wanting a cigarette then, I'm so out of here. Then, it was 3 months. Wasn't fair to give it a shorter time given I was a heavy smoker for 40 years. Then, I upped it to 6 months, after reading about the physical effects of nicotine on the body. Now, I've decided to be a non smoker. Let's face it; I'm not wanting to smoke just one; neither are you. And we know what happens if we smoke. So, I tell my head to shut the **** up when it starts lying to me again about how good it will taste, how I could just smoke every now and then, etc. Because it is a lie, you know. And who the heck wants to walk around all the time constantly craving something they can't have as much as they want? (ok, maybe that doesn't make sense to anyone but me!) Hang tough, Holski. It passes.
September 11, 201411 yr dear holski if you still want one after you watch this i dont know what to say dont smoke that cig its not worth it http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=dVLtNgAhPRg
September 11, 201411 yr Author Wow guys and gals and....creatures... Thanks each and every one of you so much for these powerful posts. I can't thank you enough. Really! I went to be at about 8:30 last night. As I was lying there, I realized how grateful I was for not smoking yesterday. I have been in that position before and didn't make it. I need to get up the courage to watch Jimmy's post, though. I'll do it today. In the meantime, I'm not leaving the train this time! :) XOXOXOXOXO!!!!
September 11, 201411 yr Holski sorry I missed this post, but so great to read to the end to and go FAB you made it through, please do not romance the cigarette, I like you over 3/4 weeks ago fixated on that one cigarette and gave it room to grow in my head, I argued with myself for days, but all the time the thought got bigger and bigger, I did not post like you did, and I relapsed it was the worst moment ever, and I most certainly do not want to go through that again, I stupidly thought, a few puffs, just one it will be ok, HELL NO, next day knock knock "I'm back". through the amazing help and support here I manage to kick it off and get back on the train after two weeks, but two wasted weeks, learn from this Holski learn to recognise it for what it is, an addiction, a crave, a thought nothing more nothing less, the thought will not kill you, but allowing it to grow and to relapse most certainly will, well done Im proud of you for getting through. xxx
September 12, 201411 yr ...Let's face it; I'm not wanting to smoke just one; neither are you. And we know what happens if we smoke. So, I tell my head to shut the **** up when it starts lying to me again about how good it will taste, how I could just smoke every now and then, etc. Because it is a lie, you know... Great post, Aine. So true, so true!!
September 12, 201411 yr You're not alone! 6 months here, and this month has been tougher than months 4 and 5 for some reason. Hubby in with heart attack, move from farm to town, etc. so I've chalked it up to changes and stress, but whatever the reason, it sucks. I want to be someone with no cravings and no memories of "good" smokes. Having said that. . . Cardiologist said husband's 2 heart attacks this month was the direct result of his smoking for 40 years. One stint later, and me (reluctantly) learning how to cook non wheat non sugar, husband's doing great. My intermittent craving for a cigarette seems to have diminished for the moment, anyway!! At first, I gave it a month; if I am still wanting a cigarette then, I'm so out of here. Then, it was 3 months. Wasn't fair to give it a shorter time given I was a heavy smoker for 40 years. Then, I upped it to 6 months, after reading about the physical effects of nicotine on the body. Now, I've decided to be a non smoker. Let's face it; I'm not wanting to smoke just one; neither are you. And we know what happens if we smoke. So, I tell my head to shut the **** up when it starts lying to me again about how good it will taste, how I could just smoke every now and then, etc. Because it is a lie, you know. And who the heck wants to walk around all the time constantly craving something they can't have as much as they want? (ok, maybe that doesn't make sense to anyone but me!) Hang tough, Holski. It passes. So powerful, Aine...and real...
September 12, 201411 yr Wow guys and gals and....creatures... Thanks each and every one of you so much for these powerful posts. I can't thank you enough. Really! I went to be at about 8:30 last night. As I was lying there, I realized how grateful I was for not smoking yesterday. I have been in that position before and didn't make it. I need to get up the courage to watch Jimmy's post, though. I'll do it today. In the meantime, I'm not leaving the train this time! :) XOXOXOXOXO!!!! Woo hoo!! Holly is all aboard!!
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