notsmokinjo

No folding of the dunny paper...but I have been known to put the notes in my purse in denomination order, and serial number order, with all the little windows facing the same way.... I may have even ironed a note before because it was crinkly... Not my most stellar idea considering our notes are plastic and irons melt plastic...oops at least it was only a fiver so I only melted the queen's face...and maybe cans in the pantry have been alphabetized...but we don't have much in cans.. i don't see myself being able to use your mum's dunny...and hey I might glue the kids socks to her legs but my rule is as long as it doesn't smell and she can shut the door if she wants to have a bedroom where the wardrobe is the floor...that's her problem not mine.

So for those of you who frequent some of the seedier social threads will know I have a touch of the OCDs...to the point I glue my daughter's school socks to her legs so they stay up and are perfectly level...now before you get all freaked and start calling child services.....I use a ligit product called sock glue, you get it from Irish dance stuppliers so how could it be wrong...and meh, so the kid has a permenant bald stripe ringing each leg, if you look closely you will notice they are perfectly symmetrical and even on both legs...ok so now you have the personality background...hold your horses my friends as the wierdness gets, well wierder......after confessing to my issues about sickest being perfectly level and even and wot not and being known to conduct image quality control based on this I must now confess....I can not wear matching socks because it's bag luck, yep you heard it here first, the sick nazi ( as the kid has dubbed me) can not wear matching socks because if I do bad things will happen...I have taken this to the extreme of sewing beads etc on one sick of a pair so that they do not match (technically) but I can still be in sport uniform.....and to take things to the extreme I have been known, on occassion, to wear odd thongs...because clearly that brings good luck.

I get a cyber Pirate. I put in a HB pencil and a cardboard box

Or maybe ecstasy

Good morning fellow NOPErs and welcome to another day of freedom. So for those of Irish Catholic descent don't forget to be hangin' a bunch of yellow flags on ya door for Corpus Christi Day and Poppin off to mass for the sacrament.....but religion aside, today is World Refugee Day...considering a fair wack if my mob were boat people refugees (came to Aus fleeing the Great Hunger in Ireland) this holds meaning...refugees and a refugee crisis us not a new thing within the history of the world but here are some startling facts, in 2019 the world refugee population exceeded 70million...so for some perspective people that is twice as many people as live in the whole of Canada, or that is all the people who live in the UK and Ireland combined and it is almost 3 times as many people as live in the whole if Australia...more than half of these refugees are kids, Pakistan has more refugees living there than any other country....sobering thoughts to have with ya weetbix. Oh well shortest day if the year tomorrow (longest for you northern mob). Will I ever put something in my mouth and burn it again....NOPE!! not one puff ever ....

Stand and deliver.

So our favourite poetry quoting Indian Princess joins the Lido Deck tomorrow...there have been some behind the scenes preparations going on and just wondering if there are any special requests..... @jillar does need to worry we will have plenty of not spicy food... The bar area is looking on point... And I'm a happy little camper cos I had a squiz in the kitchen and I saw pistachio kulfi, mango lassi and Gulab jamun...dunno wot you mob are having but I'm set. @Doreensfree even has a special outfit all ready... So I his us your last chance to get in orders for our special indian night...

^that would be NOPE 364 in non-leap year .....party time tomorrow.

Good Arvo fellow NOPErs ... It was too cold to take the gloves off and post this morning (just for giggles, my too cold is 8c, so just for the Americans who use F...46.4)....so normally today I'd be giving a shout out to Juneteenth for our friends from the land of the free, seeing as this heralds when it became more true BUT there is a pretty big birthday that is happening today.... Happy 70th Birthday to NASCAR "stock car only" racing....who on this day in 1949 held their first ever race at the Charlotte Speedway...not Charlotte Motor Speedway, which is a completely different track....so to be technical NASCAR was founded in Feb 1948 and before the 19th June 1949 they held numerous races, mainly in dirt tracks, with the first being in Daytona, BUT these were open to all cars, the 19 June 1949 saw the first stock car only event... So while any NASCAR race will never hold a candle to Bathurst (those drivers don't need to dodge roos for starters) 70 continuous years of racing deserves a woohoo.. Watching cars go round and round tracks super fast...that's a hell yeah.. Smoking a ciggie....that's NOPE...every day

Congrats @Rixcz and many blessings for a long and happy life together.

Thai massage, with happy ending.

Sorry about the smoking in the clip ... This one is for...well where do I start .....

Good morning fellow NOPErs so while we stuff our faces for International Sushi Day and our Yankee friends celebrate National Go Fishing Day ( yeah-NAH you mob can keep that, I'd rather play golf and I frickin hate golf) but that thought of fishing makes me wonder, why, when sharks are immune to all known diseases has noone every used this knowledge to make a super vaccine, for everything, I mean come on people what's multiple rows of pointy teeth between mates. And did you know that the average Aussie swallows 3 spiders a year...wot the!... Guess who's sleeping with Gaffa tape on their mouth from now on. So NOPE...not on puff (or eight legged freak of nature) Ever, never again.

I saw the first one once.

This one's for @Doreensfree ... Thinking of you ... And all the other Chicks of the QT....

Don't you have a smellgination?

Do you think it smelt bad?

Good morning fellow NOPErs....so today I need to shout out a huge thank you to our Sepo mates because today is there National Eat Your Vegetables Day...and I'm claiming it... I live in a house full of carnivores, tonight it's a full on veggie fest....there will be all my faves, yep even peas.....and because it's Eat Ya Veggies Day they can just sick it up....fun veggie fact, onions have more sugar than strawberries....but I digress, lots of veg make an awesome quit snack...carrot sticks people, they give you something to chew during a crave and their high sugar content helps with those wacky blood sugar levels during the early days. And everyone knows ya can't beat a root so why not chuck a couple if beetroots in the oven to roast up and snack on, if you slice em thin, give them a squirt with oil and a sprinkle of salt then bake until crisp...perfect chips (crisps for the Britskis) Smokes = NOPE Veggies = yeah!

Good morning fellow NOPErs and Happy Father's Day to all our dad's living in the UK, Canada, India, the Americas and the USA.....so basically all our dad's except Chris, Fab and any Kiwis, they have to wait for September. So any dad's out there lurking, in that limbo between wanting to quit and actually quitting why not celebrate Father's Day 2019 by giving yourself, your kids and your grandkids the greatest gift you can and say NOPE...not one puff every again. NOPE....cos my Dad loves that I now don't.

Well girl prisoners with babies under 2 would be putting them on there sprigs one would think. When the no smoking laws first came in there were riots. They get patches and gum and stuff.

Do you think he ever worked out who Shane was?

It would have been in Victoria, our prisons are now smoke free, he woulda had no choice.

Yep same rules down here too, fart laws must be global. Have you ever noticed that if it burns a bit on the way out it should probably have its own postcode (zip code)?

Where have you been that you missed out on learning how to party?

Waiting for the kid to wake up and go grocery shopping...and join me at Bunnings for lunch, yep Gun killed the garden snake...again....not sure if the kid trained him to do it to guarantee regular Bunnings Sausages or if he really thinks he is protecting us from its evilness.