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NOPE - Not One Puff Ever

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Nope. Is @Cbdave on hols? Hope the old cobbers OK.

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Hi all,been a while since I posted anything. I come on once and a while and check in and see how everyone is doing. I'm doing good and still smoke free. I tell people about this awesome site and all the great help here.

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Oh ... it's a surfing theme today is it? Nope!

Something to be generally aware of at this time of year also is that with changing of seasons, there are often new, unexpected triggers that will stir smokey thoughts within you. One of them may be at Thanksgiving. In Canada that comes around early-mid-Oct which isn't far off. Family gatherings are always a trigger as is the great food at that time of year. Other things you might not even connect to smoking like a walk in the woods checking out the changing colour of the leaves; it could be almost anything. If you're aware that may happen, you're less likely to have trouble getting through those times. Carry on and build that forever quit!

Stay strong and you will beat this. You have it in you and your doing great . Best wishes.

Good morning. I read this old quitnet post again and realized this is a story about recovery. The only thing that I think I would add to this post is that it is not really about lifiting the cloud in the mind left by smoking. It is all about the mistaken belief that smoking could do anything to help us cope with the normal things that happen to all of us in life. Smoking never did help us cope with thoughts, feelings or emotions. That belief is a MISTAKE. And accepting that we have the ablitity to ride any of the life's waves without smoking is the real juice that powers' recovery from nicotine addition. Keep the quit. REPOST: Taking off your cloak of smoke From AniCat on 1/27/2005 10:55:53 PM Taking off your cloak of smoke From: healing2 on 9/16/2000 11:50:03 AM As the cloud of smoke lifts from our lives when we quit smoking so many of us sit in our wooden chair looking around the room at the blank walls wondering where we are and what we do next. It's like the smoke leaks out of a dryer vent or other small hole in the room, taking its time, leaving behind residue that needs scrubbing. Some of it is entirely hidden for months and months. We are surprised that we had yet to discover these facets of our lives that were permeated by the smell of smoke. It seems that as the layers of smoke are scrubbed away we barely recognize the room we call our lives and ourselves we call the ruler of that life. It's funny how we thought we were present for our lives and yet when we quit, we discover that not unlike the smoke we were kind of hovering around, above, and under that thing which we called living. Just as are bodies become cleansed from not smoking our lives need cleansing of tamped down emotions, unrecognized dreams, and unresolved conflict. Yes, we do have lots of work to do. Knowing where to begin, what deserves our immediate attention, and how to go about cleaning up the mess we feel we've made is a tremendous challenge. But as we sit in the barren room, the old curtains torn down and the windows bare we are but naked as the walls. We've torn off those cloaks of smoke and begun our lives again and we are as naked as a baby. What a blessing we've given ourselves. We get to rebuild, redecorate, pick a new wardrobe, and plant a new garden. Another season of our lives is before us and unlike the baby, we can express ourselves with more insight than we ever thought possible. Something transforming happens when you dispense with something as negative as smoking. The light is turned on; the glasses sharpen the image; and the ability to verbalize becomes simpler and clearer. Even though we feel overwhelmed at the magnitude of the restoration of our lives, we feel in awe that we were so unaware of its becoming rundown. How could we not have noticed that things had become such a shambles? Ah yes, the smoke blurred the lines, it made everything appear a comfortable shade of gray. Now as the vibrancy of life becomes once again apparent we want to hurry the process of reclaiming what is ours. We want to shine every crystal, polish every marble table top, and scour all the negativism of our former selves. We feel an urgency to repair damaged woodwork, paint the flaking and peeling relationships of our lives, and scour our bodies inside and out. Of course a project of this grandeur will take time but oh how anxious we are to begin. Now though it may seem daunting, this rebuilding of our lives, what a more worthwhile project? Would we choose to sit in the dark another five years, waiting for someone to pull us from the choking smoke of death? Would we cover our eyes, and hearts, and minds as life went on around us, just outside our prison walls? Would we perpetuate the false, fog like existence that years of smoking had draped around us? Nope, let's take off that cloak, put on some rubber gloves, grab a bucket and get busy. THE AWAKENING A time comes in your life when you finally get it . . . when in the midst of all your fears and insanity you stop dead in your tracks and somewhere the voice inside your head cries out: ENOUGH! Enough of the fighting and crying and struggling to hold on. And, like a child quieting down after a blind tantrum, your sobs begin to subside, you shudder once or twice, you blink back your tears, and through a mantle of wet lashes you begin to look at the world through new eyes. This is your awakening. You realize that it’s time to stop hoping and waiting for something to change or for happiness, safety and security to come galloping over the next horizon. You come to terms with the fact that he is not Prince Charming and you are not Cinderella and that in the real world there aren’t always fairytale endings (or beginnings for that matter) and that any guarantee of `happily ever after` must begin with you and in the process a sense of serenity is born of acceptance. You awaken to the fact that you are not perfect and that not everyone will always love, appreciate, or approve of who or what you are . . .and that’s OK. (They are entitled to their own views and opinions.) And you learn the importance of loving and championing yourself and in the process a sense of new found confidence is born of self-approval. You stop bitching and blaming other people for the things they did to you (or didn’t do for you,) and you learn that the only thing you can really count on is the unexpected. You learn that people don’t always say what they mean or mean what they say and that not everyone will always be there for you and that it’s not always about you. So, you learn to stand on your own and to take care of yourself, and in the process a sense of safety and security is born of self-reliance. You stop judging and pointing fingers and you begin to accept people as they are and to overlook their shortcomings and human frailties, and in the process a sense of peace & contentment are born of forgiveness. You realize that much of the way you view yourself, and the world around you, is as a result of all the messages and opinions that have been ingrained into your psyche. You begin to sift through all the crap you’ve been fed about how you should behave, how you should look, how much you should weigh, what you should wear, where you should shop, what you should drive, how and where you should live, what you should do for a living, who you should sleep with, who you should marry, what you should expect of a marriage, the importance of having and raising children, or what you owe your parents. You learn to open up to new worlds and different points of view. And you begin reassessing and redefining who you are what you really stand for. You learn the difference between wanting and needing and you begin to discard the doctrines and values you’ve outgrown, or should never have bought into to begin with, and in the process you learn to go with your instincts. You learn that it is truly in giving that we receive; and that there is power and glory in creating and contributing. You stop maneuvering through life merely as a `consumer` looking for your next fix. You learn that principles such as honesty and integrity are not the outdated ideals of a by gone era but the mortar that holds together the foundation upon which you must build a life. You learn that you don’t know everything, that it’s not your job to save the world and that you can’t teach a pig to sing. You learn to distinguish between guilt and responsibility, and you learn the importance of setting boundaries and of learning to say NO. You learn that the only cross to bear is the one you choose to carry and that martyrs get burned at the stake. Then you learn about love: Romantic love and familiar love. You learn how to love, how much to give in love, when to stop giving, and when to walk away. You learn not to project your needs or your feelings onto a relationship. You learn that you will not be more beautiful, more intelligent, more lovable or important because of the man or woman on your arm or the child that bears your name. You learn to look at relationships as they really are and not as you would have them be. You stop trying to control people, situations and outcomes. You learn that just as people grow and change so it is with love. And you learn that you don’t have the right to demand love on your terms. And, you learn that alone does not mean lonely. And you look in the mirror and come to terms with the fact that you will never be a size 5 or a perfect 10 and you stop trying to compete with the image inside your head and agonizing over how you “stack up”. You also stop working so hard at putting your feelings aside, smoothing things over, and ignoring your needs. You learn that feelings of entitlement are perfectly OK, and you learn that it is your right to want things and to ask for the things that you want--and that sometimes it is necessary to make demands. You come to the realization that you deserve to be treated with love, kindness, sensitivity, and respect, and you decide you won’t settle for less. And you allow only the hands of a lover who cherishes you to glorify you with his or her touch . . . and in the process you internalize the meaning of self-respect. And you learn that your body really is your temple. And you begin to care for it and treat it with respect. You begin eating a balanced diet, drinking more water, and taking more time to exercise. You learn that fatigue diminishes the spirit and can create doubt and fear. So you take more time to rest. And, just as food fuels the body, laughter fuels our soul. So you take more time to laugh and to play. You learn that for the most part, in life, you get what you believe you deserve . . . and that much of life truly is a self-fulfilling prophecy. You learn that anything worth achieving is worth working for and that wishing for something to happen is different than working toward making it happen. More importantly, you learn that in order to achieve success you need direction, discipline, and perseverance. You also learn that no one can do it all alone and that it’s OK to risk asking for help. You learn that the only thing you must truly fear is the great robber baron of all time: FEAR itself. You learn to step right into and through your fears, because you know that whatever happens you can handle it and to give in to fear is to give away the right to live life on your terms. And you learn to fight for your life and not to squander it living under a cloud of impending doom. You learn that life isn’t always fair, you don’t always get what you think you deserve and that sometimes `bad` things happen to unsuspecting, good people. On these occasions you learn not to personalize things. You learn that God isn’t punishing you or failing to answer your prayers. It’s just life happening. And you learn to deal with evil in its most primal state: the ego. You learn that negative feelings such as anger, envy, and resentment must be understood and redirected or they will suffocate the life out of you and poison the universe that surrounds you. You learn to admit when you are wrong and to building bridges instead of walls. You learn to be thankful and to take comfort in many of the simple things we take for granted, things that millions of people upon the earth can only dream about: a full refrigerator, clean running water, a soft warm bed, a long hot shower. Slowly, you begin to take responsibility for yourself by yourself, and you make yourself a promise never to betray yourself and never, ever to settle for less than your heart’s desire. And you hang a wind chime outside your window so you can listen to the wind. And you make a point to keep smiling, to keep trusting, and to stay open to every wonderful possibility. Finally, with courage in your heart, you take a deep breath and you begin to design the life you want to live as best as you can. Author Unknown

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Another take on working through cravings when they pop up. Keep the quit. RE: Identifying triggers.... From MutinyFever on 2/12/2004 1:22:08 PM My take on triggers was written a long while ago. Triggers From MutinyFever on 5/12/2003 6:43:46 PM ~ 219 dayz Anything can be a trigger. An ashtray, snow, a pack of cigs, a good dinner, a movie, waiting for a bus, getting off the bus, a fight, a birth, a victory, a joy, sex, drinking, dancing, singing, asthma, winning a bet, losing a bet, work, stress, bedtime, waking up, a commercial, a baby crying, seeing an old friend, losing an old friend, breathing... The thing is no one can really control triggers. They happen. People say, stay out of the situation, but that is not the trick to quitting. That is just a way to make it easier. The trick to quitting is enduring cravings, one after another, one at a time, FOREVER. If that sounds hard, it should because it is. Thankfully cravings don`t keep coming forever, or they get spaced very far apart at least, eventually. But don`t count on that time. Don`t think about that time. Don`t wish that time were here. Experience what is now. There`s a good reason to. It is because if you experience the pain of this moment, you will realize that smoking caused this. If you really let yourself realize that, you will never want to do this to yourself again. There`s another good reason. It is that if you are really honest, you will realize this is not that bad. Chemo would be a good deal worse than this craving. Admit it. You can handle this. Commit to handling this craving each and every time it comes. Face it. The monster has blunt teeth. I am sorry you are craving. I totally sympathize, because I have been craving pretty hard myself from time to time. I can only say, this is the way our lives are now. I don`t avoid smokers. I don`t avoid triggers. Cigarettes and the triggers to smoke are just everywhere. I am simply committed to enduring all my cravings, one at a time, without ever smoking. I wish for everyone, the strength to endure. Long and long from now, you will realize you haven`t had a craving for as long as you can remember. Be happy now. Michael

Good morning, On this day in 2004, I was feeling depressed and reached out to quitnet for some help. And Dan1 responded to remind me that what I was feeling was normal and thinking that having a cigarette would have anything to do with making me feel better was just more stinking thinking: a MISTAKE. As Dan1 said in this post, its all about discovering new ways of coping with emotions without smoking. Keep the quit! RE: Depression From danl1 on 10/25/2004 11:49:56 AM It's a tough time you are going through, but don't let it bug you too much. The feelings you are having are more about an exaggeration than about an 'unmasking.' It's a critical error that often gets made - thinking that soon after we quit is "how things are" without smoking. It's not - this temporary time is unique, and will pass. Unfortunately, it's a time when many people start to form beliefs about the way "they really are" and that they need to learn new ways to cope without smoking. The danger of this thinking is that it gives cigarettes a power that they don't have. Cigarettes have no way whatever to improve our moods or emotional states, and never did. But because of this rapid change in emotional state as we quit, it becomes easy to believe that they did, and people form a permanent belief that cigarettes were somehow useful - and that belief is responsible for a lot of recidivism. Don't fall for it. Understand that these feelings are simply a part of the quitting process, related in part to the physical and mental stresses that accompany this process - stresses that addicts can't fully appreciate since they've long since forgotten what reality is all about as smoking is concerned. A time will come when you regularly feel better than you ever did as 'normal' as a smoker. Smoking will soon be recognized only for what it is - a way to make yourself feel worse, never better. Sadly, that change occurs gradually for most folks. It's never as fast as we'd like, but it's always as fast as we need.

Good morning. This is another reminder that smoking does NOTHING to change any situation in life. Keep the quit! RE: Why do I keep making excuses to smoke? From Belle650 on 5/9/2004 8:35:46 AM Part of being ready to quit includes having the willingness to look at quitting in a new light. Quitting smoking is NOT a punishment! It is NOT a vindictive thing we do to ourselves to atone for the smoking. It IS a difficult journey, not for the weak of heart. We fail in our attempts to quit because we ALLOW ourselves the "comfort zone" of lighting up at the first twinge of discomfort. Smoking does not change any of the situations in our lives but it DOES put a barrier between us and the rest of the world. We STINK and people keep their distance. Smoking is a wonderful aid in isolation. You do NOT have to want to quit more than you want to smoke. Most of us wanted to smoke. You DO have to be willing to take the control of your life and your emotions away from that small amount of paper-wrapped tobacco and become responsible for your own destiny. Who is in control here???? Who's life is it, anyway??? Wendy 205 days, 19 hours, 17 minutes and 3 seconds smoke free. 8232 cigarettes not smoked. 2 months, 2 days, 21 hours of my life saved! My quit date: 10/16/2003 1:10:00 PM

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Boo Quit Date: March 9, 2016 Posted March 28, 2016 For much of the last couple of weeks, I hit a mental wall of sorts. It wasn't that I was craving a cigarette so much as I was finding it difficult to identify myself as a nonsmoker. Nagging, insecure thoughts were persistent. I began to doubt if I was really done with smoking for good. My policy to this point had been to "fight like hell." What am I fighting? The fight is with addiction of course, but do I really need to fight? My addiction is my own creation and is not an independent entity. Addiction cannot hide around corners, jumping me when I least expect it and force me to smoke against my will. Addiction can only plant a seed, it is my choice to cultivate it or not. My addiction only has the power I give it. I've ceased fighting my addiction and since then, its voice has been a whimper subjugated to the back of my mind. When I was fighting tooth-and-nail, its voice roared. I recognize its existence, but now any irrational addiction thoughts that spring to mind are quickly silenced by reason and logic. I am not becoming complacent, I simply realized the futility of building a thing up only to spend the rest of the day attempting to knock it down. There is no reason for me to fight as I have finally realized there is nothing to fear. Maintaining a successful quit is a simple matter of never making a conscious decision to place a cigarette in my mouth and light it on fire. It does not get more simple than that. I spent time in the darkness, but eventually saw the light. Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/6851-perception-shift/

Hello @jillar This post is a gem. I went back to the original thread. I believe that is the key... we have to stop giving cigarettes power and shift faulty thinking. Here is a Dan1 classic from quitnet on March 24, 2007. Keep the quit! Addicts and non-addicts are exactly alike - with only a few differences. Addicts have cravings; non-addicts have hunger, thirst, headaches, depression, anxiety, and so on. The feelings are identical, but addicts use the wrong word. Do yourself the favour of honesty and call things by their right names. Perhaps then you can do the right thing about them, and there won’t be anything to fight. Addicts have withdrawal; non-addicts have stress. The sensations and chemical causes are identical, but addicts use the wrong word. Also, the addict takes nicotine, which amplifies the feelings. The addict in recovery often `fights` against these feelings, and so only adds to the stress. Stop the insanity. Address stress the way sane folk do. Don’t think that smoking will help. Don’t think that fighting will help. They can only make it worse. Addicts have urges and desires; non-addicts have memories. Again, same thing, wrong word. I remember my old girlfriend, but that doesn’t mean I want to wreck my life and leave my wife. And while I’m remembering, I’ll remember the hells that wench put me through. While you’re remembering smoking, remember that made you feel good only by taking away some of its own bad, and that bad is gone for good now. Addicts fear consequences, non-addicts fear causes. Stop looking for the `next one`, start seeing through your delusions. Then there won’t be a `next one`. Addicts believe that addiction `makes` them think things; non-addicts know that faulty thinking IS the addiction. You stopped believing in monsters under your bed, stop believing in demons between your ears. You can quit. It can be amazingly easy and permanent. You just have to quit the right things. Quit using the wrong words. Quit lying to yourself. Quit fearing your own imagination. Do it consistently for two months, and I guarantee you will find yourself quoting Dr. King: `Free at last! Free at last! Thank God Almighty, we’re free at last!` Addiction is not about weakness, Recovery is not about strength. Addiction is about self-deception, Recovery is about self-love.

Many thanks @Doreensfree Thank you @Gus Thank you @jillar

I’m so very sorry for your loss. You have been doing a wonderful job fighting through these triggers you’ve had to endure. Keep fighting.

My sympathy G You are fighting for your Quit . This shows your strength and dedication . Well done a well earned Pat on the back

So very sorry for your loss @Genecanuck It most definitely is times like these that can break a quit, and you are doing fantastic not giving into that quit! You should be very proud of yourself! Onward to day 15 and before you know it, you will be quit a month. The time does pass by quickly, and the longer you go without smoking, the less of an urge you will have!

I too am sorry for your loss @Genecanuck, you've been given some pretty big triggers to get past so early and should be proud of yourself for keeping that awesome quit. You're doing great!

I'm very sorry for your loss @Genecanuck. You already know that smoking does not bring joy... and likewise cannot heal sorrows. Well done for protecting your quit during all of the ups and downs that you are facing. You've faced some big tests early in your quit, and your success so far is a good indicator that you're truly ready to be free. KTQ!

Sorry for your loss @Genecanuck. You've gone through some challenges this weekend for sure but your attitude toward keeping your quit above all else shows just how committed you are which is a great thing. All these trying experiences we go through successfully while quitting are the things that help strengthen our quit. Getting through those challenging times is an important part of all successful quits. Keep up the great work

Gday Jo My favourite smoking wood. Just a hint of the Aussie bush

Right on, L4L. Just experienced this for myself on a business trip this past week. Big airports, two loooong cross country flights, loooong meetings in a state government building on a nonsmoking campus, all in 100+ degree weather. As a smoker, this would have driven me bonkers. As a quitter, not so!

Good morning, Here is another gem from Dan1 in Quitnet. Dan is reminding people to examine their values related to smoking. You know those values and beliefs that all tobacco advertisers drilled into our heads into our heads in the 50s, 60s and 70's. Women might remember, "You've come a long way baby". Women were also told by the tobacco industry that they should smoke to "believe in themselves" and that smoking was their pathway to "freedom". There was also the slogan "Winston tastes good like a cigarette should". Or men were told that Camel was "ever inch a man's smoke". I mention this tobacco industry propaganda because they understood that if they could convice people to re-align actions like smoking to a set of pleasurable values, we would all get hooked on smoking. AND IT WORKED. Dan1 is reminding us that we also have the power to reset those values. In his words, "A cigarette is not capable of making us think, feel, or experience a single thing". Keep the quit. If you struggle, there is one simple reason: You believe that smoking provides you with something you want or need - Why is this so hard? Dan1 (Quitnet, 2007) It's a question worth asking, and I'm convinced that the usual answers aren't good enough. After all, continuing to smoke is easy - just ask anyone here. And being free of smoking is even easier - just ask anyone who's made it, or anyone who's never smoked, or simply consult your own common sense. So why is the path from 'easy' to 'easier' so hard? Maybe you're taking the wrong path. And no, I'm not engaging in the senseless debate about Cold Turkey vs meds. That has an answer as individual as your personality. How you answer that question is in no way related to how someone else did or should answer it. No, the wrong path is in thinking of this as a battle of will. It simply is not, and making it seem like one is the only thing that makes this difficult. “Will” can only do one thing: follow your own pre-existing values. You can use it to smoke or to not smoke with equal ease. The thing that you can't do for long is turn it against you - to make yourself act against your own self interests. If you struggle, there is one simple reason: You believe that smoking provides you with something you want or need - in short, you value smoking. When you struggle to not smoke, all you are doing is asking your will to act against your values. That is a source of tremendous stress and anxiety, and those in turn cause all of the 'quit symptoms' that make this so hellish. Every failed quit is simply willpower finding it's triumph - by re-aligning your actions to your values. In this state of affairs, smoking is a victory of the will, not a failure, No wonder we find that it feels so good. But it doesn't have to be this way. Instead of fighting against the thought to smoke, get to know it a little. Find out where it came from, what it's real purpose is. Your body and brain don't want to smoke - but they may desire some change that you incorrectly believe smoking can give. A cigarette is not capable of making us think, feel, or experience a single thing, other than a bit of nausea and a somewhat elevated heartbeat. It can't make us happy, contented, or relaxed. All these other things (and a thousand others) are strictly a question of the interpretation of that otherwise meaningless event. But by believing the myth that cigarettes have the power to change our thoughts, fears, wishes, or circumstances, we run from something that we needn't fear, and strengthen the very notions that have us reaching again and again for that little white tube of death. 21 months ago, I quit smoking with the assumption that I would smoke again. It was not that I wanted to, planned to, or thought I would need to. Instead, it was a confidence in my ability to be stupid. I simply assumed that sooner or later I would screw up. This turned out to be a great benefit. Instead of growing tense over an impossibly high-seeming perfection, I could instead think about how to prevent the inevitable stumble from turning into a fall. And on that path I found a signpost to freedom: That the "stumble" wasn't in actually smoking, but in thinking positively about smoking. The "fall" wasn't smoking the pack, not even taking a puff. The "fall" was in holding on to incorrect values. Smoking was simply the most obvious external sign that my beliefs were screwed up. At that point, it could hardly matter if I smoked or not - fighting was in itself a failure. That might sound like I'm setting the bar even higher than not smoking - that you're somehow not allowed to even think of smoking. But that's exactly wrong. I'm inviting you instead to think deeply about smoking, about what it means to you, about why you believe these things that the vast majority of the world can't even understand. Each thought of smoking becomes an opportunity to understand how and where your beliefs and values are wrong, and to realign them to your greater truth - that you do not want to smoke. That's why you started this journey, isn't it? Now, changing beliefs isn't easy, but it's not hard, either. Mostly, it just takes time. And you have plenty of time. Instead of spending time fighting with yourself, spend it understanding that the very thing you are fighting over is a mistake, an error. Suddenly, the fight is gone. Yes, it's still annoying listening to that endless 'wanna smoke?' mental drumbeat. But that fades as the belief that 'smoking helps' fades. And yes, you will from time to time experience symptoms. But as long as you recognize that quitting didn't cause them (at least, not in the sense of 'needing' nicotine) and that smoking has no way to help them (that power resides only in you, and always did), they will pass, and there will be no struggle. Yes, it can be hard. But it doesn't have to be. If you find too much 'hard' between 'easy' and 'easier', check your map. Either you've made a wrong turn, or you're using the wrong map. Dan. 640 days (21 months) smoke free. 12798 cigarettes not smoked. $2,240.00 and 3 months, 7 days, 18 hours of your life saved. "Life is either a great adventure, or it is nothing."

Good morning, I decided to re-read this gem from Dan1 (Quitnet) today. I think I am going to re-word the title of his post and call it: No More Battle Stress No more battle stress because fighting the stress cauased by not smoking creates more stress. If we do not mentally resist the waves and figure out nicotine just screwed up the reward system in our brain, then it is no longer a battle or a fight. What we resist, will persist. Instead of fleeing, we can just flow. Keep the quit! I WAS WRONG! From danl1 on 3/12/2004 10:21:00 AM I was wrong. That does it. That is the secret to quitting this nasty thing forever. Park the egos at the door and be willing to recognize that nicotine's effects on our brains duped us. Played us for the fool. Made us the rubes. Smoking did not ever help us, never gave us a single good thing. All it ever did was flip the 'ooh, that was good' switch deep inside our brains, without ever bothering to actually give us anything good. Our goofball minds just connected the dots in the wrong way, and gave smokes credit for things they didn't do. Once we understand that we've been had, we've got the tools needed to make this thing really start to happen. If there's a 'craving', it suddenly breaks in half. Half is a minor physical or mental discomfort that will be gone in a few moments. Sucks, but oh well. The other half is a thought that smoking would somehow improve the situation that smoking had caused. Oops! Error in the brain! We know it's an error, just toss it aside. Have an 'urge', thinking, "gee, a smoke would be nice" Bzrzrzrzrttt! Wrong! Another small wiring problem - hang on - there, it's fixed. In no time, it gets funny, totaling up all the screw-ups the brain has accumulated. See? There's nothing to fear. Nothing to fear, so nothing to fight. Nothing to fight, so much less stress. Less stress, so greatly reduced symptoms. Less symptoms, so less cravings. Less cravings, so less deal with. And as we build our success, we start firing off that 'reward' switch honestly, and the brain begins to learn proper lessons. The lies are erased. We get to decide if this thing spirals up, or spirals down. The only difference is the willingness to acknowledge... I was wrong. About everything I ever believed about the 'good' parts of smoking, and about their power over me. And strength, and willpower, and fighting? Not a thing to do with success. For most folks, they get in the way of success, by having them believe there is something to fight, by causing 'battle-stress' and a sort of fatigue that only leaves folks 'craving' all the more. Once I stopped fighting long enough to realize that the craving was only a lie I was telling myself, a tiny error in my brain, there was suddenly nothing left to fight.

Carefull ... what's that saying? Pride goeth before a fall?

Hello everyone, Well hubby came home yesterday, and we invited another friend over for dinner. Hubby and his friend were both smokers. I had a few drinks and yes, was experiencing a major craving. I really wanted to go out on the balcony with them and smoke. But I chose not to do that and stayed inside and read the news. There are two craving situations that I dealt with last night. I used to smoke big time when I had a few drinks. Years ago, I learned to be ok with drinking and not smoking, but this took time. I had to live through a few major cravings to break that smoking-drinking association. The second craving I dealt with last night was living through and experiencing not smoking with hubby and his friend during a relaxing and fun social situation. I chose to stay inside while they went out to smoke. I know that in the past, I have been able to be ok sitting beside smokers and not smoking. And I know that I will be able to do this again without experiencing a craving for cigarettes. As long as I no longer indulge in smoking, that craving situation will go away. I can't put my head in the sand and expect the world or smokers to go away just because I decided to be a nonsmoker. This is my quit and I am doing this for me. Keep the quit!

Herer is another favourite post from Dan1, someone that became a mentor for me on Quitnet many years ago. He was celebrating a 9 month quit. The Story of a Full-Term Quit - The Chain Dan1: March 24, 2007 (9 month ramble) Starting in my youth, and working across the decades, I forged a chain, and anchored it to the wall of my cell. No one made me do it; dungeon cells simply aren’t fashionable without chains. One day, I decided to see what was beyond the walls of the dungeon. Part I remembered from youth, part I heard from others, but I knew there was a life outside, and I was sure it had to be brighter than the haze I knew here. I knew I must either become free, or die in this wretched place. If I was going to be free, I knew I would have to break the chain, and I was afraid I might not be equal to the task. But until I really pulled against it, I never realized how strong I had made it. I put my back, my arms, my legs into the effort; the harder I pulled, the more it hurt; but the chain never budged. Every effort I could manage, over and over again. I cried, I screamed, I groaned against it; I couldn’t even bend a link. I looked at it’s fastening to the wall - perhaps there was a tool I could use against the anchor. But the only tools I could find would not fit this nut. I called out for help. Other prisoners called back - They couldn’t come help me pull, for they were busy with their own chains, but we were always there for one another with shouts of encouragement and advice. Once in a while, someone who had become free would shout over the walls, but once free, most never returned to the cells. Occasionally, someone would break loose, only to be recaptured by our common enemy. Some prisoners came to believe that it was impossible to ever be truly free; still, they pulled bravely at their chains, hoping to stretch them a little. `Pull Harder!` `Never quit pulling!` `You made the chain, you can break it!` my comrades yelled. We cheered together each time there was the slightest bend in any chain; cried together whenever someone stumbled in exhaustion. After so much work and so little gain, I no longer had the strength, the will to pull. Still, I could not escape the dream of making it to that other, brighter world. There had to be another way. Just then, it happened. Someone on the way out, someone who had found his freedom, whispered to me. `Your hands` was all I managed to hear, and he was gone. I scarcely knew what to make of it. I searched. I read. I looked everywhere for the secret. How could my hands have the solution? There was no way I could ever grow them to be strong enough to break the chain. Days later, I did what should have been obvious: I looked at my bruised, bloody, beaten hands. Wrapped inside of them was my chain. All these years, all this turmoil - how could I not have noticed? Day 10. The day I saw the chain in my hands. It wasn’t holding on to me; I was holding on to it. All that was ever necessary to claim my freedom was to drop the chain and walk away. Yes, it took a while for the wounds to heal, the bruises to clear, the pains to go away. Sometimes when it’s cold, I can still feel a distant ache in my hands. But I will never again pick up that chain. There is no reason, no temptation, no urge to do that ever again. It is a chain I don’t want attached to an anchor I don’t need, in a cell no longer mine. I’m still not sure why I ever made that chain. A simple story, really. How I forged my chain, hardening it in fires of smouldering tobacco. How I struggled to break the chain, and how the struggle made me weak, but did nothing to the chain. The story of finding that strength of the chain wasn’t the problem, that my own weakness was irrelevant. Only my belief in its power held me; only by refusing to let go was I enslaved. A simple story, but nine months later, I’m still not done telling it. Then again, maybe I am. Look at your hands. Why are you still fighting? Why are you still holding on?

One more thing, as long as I'm in testifying mode...I've spent a good deal of time reading about how nicotine rewired our addicted brains. That's important knowledge to have when you are quitting. Now I am more focused on how we can rewire our brains when we quit. There is good news fellow quitters, we can change our neural pathways and rewire our brains. The process begins as soon as we quit. Here is a brief video about neuroplasticity that I think is relevant to the quitting process: