August 19, 201412 yr Hi everyone, realising just what Freedom means to me came at a price over the last few days, but thanks to some amazing and wonderful people I have come to realise that breaking free of the addiction is possible, it can be done, I romanced the nicotine and I allowed the inner junkie room to grow, something I always told my family of quitters never to do, and yet I danced with nicotine devil myself, never never think that just a few puffs will be okay because the junkie is there in the background waiting, hovering looking for a chance to reel you back in, its so fast, so lethal, that you barely have time to think about what you have done. So cap in hand I've opened to the door to the carriage and I'm back on board, I must make a promise to myself that I will not allow any romancing to be done, I will remember what happens if you allow the junkie room to breath and grow and I am now going to rest my timer.
August 19, 201412 yr nope is always the way to go I learned this the hard way. It's simple yet true and it never fails :)
August 19, 201412 yr So happy to read this!! You can do this...you will never fall for that thought, again. I'm sending you a big hug!!!
August 19, 201412 yr Awww jackie you little star I am mush right now to read your post so happy you are back hun xxxx
August 19, 201412 yr There is my Jackie! (((Jackie))) Welcome back on board, I am so proud and happy that you came right back. You can do this Jackie, I know that you can.
August 19, 201412 yr Jackie, you just made my day, you little superstar! I am so glad that you realised your mistake, and jumped right back on board - I couldn't be prouder - that tales a lot of guts ;) Here for you if you need me (((Jackie)))
August 19, 201412 yr Atta girl!! No more testing honey, addiction is a biatch, moving swiftly on! Loves to you. xx
August 19, 201412 yr Jackie, you are oh so right! It doesn't seem possible, it doesn't seem fair, that after months and months one little cigarette can throw us for a loop like that. But it does. That is the nature of an addiction-- any addiction. Below is a copy of something I wrote a few weeks ago when Robin Williams died. His remarks really resonated with me. Maybe the will resonate with you, too. "Poor Robin Williams took his own life yesterday. Such a brilliant, tortured man! Naturally, the media are replaying many interviews that Mr. Williams gave over the years. I was particularly struck by one interview with Charlie Rose. During the interview, Charlie Rose asked Robin Williams what happened to make him start drinking again after 20 years of being sober. Robin Williams said that he was in a store one day and there was this tiny little bottle of Jack Daniels on the shelf. Just a tiny bottle--one good slug. Robin said to himself, "What harm could that one little slug do?" So he bought it and drank it. Robin Williams said that with the very FIRST drop-- the whiskey had barely touched his tongue-- he could feel his alcohol demon rise up inside him and say, "I'VE GOT YOU AGAIN, A**H**LE!! Ha Ha!!" (Of course, you have to imagine Robin saying that in his own inimitable funny voice.) I think that there are two important lessons here. The first, obviously, is the fact that with an addiction--any addiction-- there is no such thing as "just one". The addictive demons are still inside of us ready to spring to life and grab us again at a moment's notice. Sad but true. "
August 19, 201412 yr Welcome home sweetheart...... I'm so happy to see you back here..... Ok,let's get you on a great quit.....you had us scared for a bit there..... ((((((((((((((((((((((((((( group hug ))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
August 19, 201412 yr Jumping back on Jackie, that's the spirit. Squashing any thoughts one day at a time, sounds perfect and realistic. I have ever reason to believe that this one, now, is the one. Head down and crack on my lovely Jackie.
August 19, 201412 yr Whooo Hooo, look at you back and kick'n cig. ass, I'm soooo happy you're back on the QT.. cool, VERY cool!! :D I'm with Doreen, you get a {{{{group hug}}}} and a cookie ;)
August 19, 201412 yr Author Bakon disgusting, Im already feeling lethargic, my throat hurts, my head hurts, my nose is irritated, all within minutes of the first few puffs, my heart has been racing, im back at the starting line and already feel scared of losing the nicotine, although I had a 7 month quit under my belt and had lost the fear the fear is definitely back, the inner addiction is scary and all it took was one small puff it to take hold, its like a hypnotising hold, you know you don't want to go back but that addiction is whispering in your ear again, DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES GIVE THE ADDICTION ROOM TO GROW or you could throw your life away xx
August 19, 201412 yr You have me an emotional wreck!!! Soo bloody proud of you jack, thank you for coming back to us, my heart was a little broken when I first saw you smoked but I am genuinely crying here, happy/sad tears. Don't do that to us again, I really got a fright and thought thats it thats the end of chatting to our jack everyday but no I was wrong, you did it, that stupid nic demon can go fcuk off, you're too good for that crap. I ♥ Jackie xxxxxx
August 19, 201412 yr Won't let you go...I'm like a pet stalker :) Everything happens for a reason Jac, quit back in the game and we will watch you better. You will watch others better too. xx
August 19, 201412 yr Jackie, thank you for your honesty. You are a nonsmoker in your heart and physically again.
August 20, 201412 yr So glad to see you back Jackie - you know you can do it and we are all here for you if you need it - just as long as we don't smother you with all of our welcome back hugs first
August 20, 201412 yr Hey Jackie. Good to see you. That was a LONG practice quit....but worth it. Don't be scared, you can absolutely do this.
August 21, 201412 yr Bakon disgusting, Im already feeling lethargic, my throat hurts, my head hurts, my nose is irritated, all within minutes of the first few puffs, my heart has been racing, im back at the starting line and already feel scared of losing the nicotine, although I had a 7 month quit under my belt and had lost the fear the fear is definitely back, the inner addiction is scary and all it took was one small puff it to take hold, its like a hypnotising hold, you know you don't want to go back but that addiction is whispering in your ear again, DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES GIVE THE ADDICTION ROOM TO GROW or you could throw your life away xx This is the truth. Glad to see you're back at it and more determined than ever. You can do this. We can do this together.
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