Leaderboard

Shhh, I feel ok *looks left and right for the easy peasy crew* haha. I don't smoke, 6 other people don't smoke now because I showed it could be done. Of course they were considering it anyway, isn't every smoker considering quitting. Where I am today is where I could only dream of being before and I fully respect that and hold onto it. Things have really been getting to me lately. I have felt massively overwhelmed, as such some of my posts might have seemed a bit sad, that's life tho. I won't pretend to be something I'm not and I refuse to be fake. My support for the people here has been unwavering, of course it always will be. The rest of my life has seen yet another hermit month, where I regroup. I'm sure the swear thread has been fully utilized! Sometimes I wish the journey wasn't so hard, but it's only through the tough times of my life that true enlightenment or the next stage, whatever you call it, comes to light. I like that through the last month when I consider smoking it is easy to dismiss the thought. I mean I get the right royal hump I have the thoughts, but that mental baseball bat is dead handy! Getting some violence about this quittin malarky lol. I get what the easy crew are saying now. It isn't that quittin is a walk in the park, it's how you aim your mind. I fear I did this the hard way again, shocker!! So I stand (sit, it's been a long day!) and say this - henceforth, I am going to do all in my power to be happier. Aside from that, new plan, live my life the way I want too. At the risk of sounding like a dodgy song, I am what I am, like it or lump it. I have too much self worth to be trodden down now, too much confidence to be afraid of being judged. They can do what they want and say what they want. I am really ok. It's taken a while. And a few people. And a shedload of people telling me I am worthwhile. This here train will never know what they did for me and I will pay it forward with all I'm worth. In the interim I feel 6 months is a real turning point for me. I was waiting for it and I do defo feel calmer today then I did a week ago. Don't matter tho, no matter what I'm a non smoker :) Non smoker, sounds pretty cool to me. Missed my peace of 4 months, feel like it's ready to settle on me again and I'm more than ready. BOOM!!

The last few weeks I have been thinking “What if I was still smoking” and the only answer I can come up with is I may not be here today. I wish I quit sooner but am so glad I did when I did. I have been dealing with some health issues lately and I know a lot has to do with smoking and also heredity. My cholesterol was extremely high and for the past 7 months I have been working on getting that lowered. And the last several weeks my blood pressure started to become dangerously high (208/123) was told by my physician that if I have any chest pains to get myself to the ER. Guess what? I found myself in the ER with chest pains last Monday. The good thing was I was not having a heart attack and all the doctors could tell me was at this time your heart is good but more test are needed. So now I just sit and wait for the phone calls with test dates and times. It’s a good thing I work for a cardiologist as he has been talking me through thing. This is not what I thought I would be posting on my ONE Year anniversary smoke free. But despite all this this has been one on the best years. This year of not smoking has not been easy but it has been easier than I thought it would be. So in closing I would like to say a big thanks to everyone. Even though I read more than I posted I learned so much from everyone.

This is what I posted for how I felt and feel, copied and pasted to my blog for once. - Don't put anything in your mouth and set it on fire! Actually, when someone put it like that it sounded like a pretty stupid plan anyway :) - Smoking is not on the table. Shortened to SNOT, thank goodness, my memory is shot from kids, I can remember short words! - NOPE - yep, like SNOT. Going with the KISS philosophy (keep it simple stupid) - One puff away from a pack a day There were so many reasons it took me till 38 (now 39) to get to this point. A genuine belief for so many years that smoking relieved my stress and it's not like I have a lot for me. My Dad had tried to bribe me. My Mum would make a lot of quitting noise but no actual results, just a cut down that never lasted. A lot of other people said if I can do it anyone can do it too, but no actual advice other then that? I really feel someone should have told me this. It won't hurt at all! It won't "feel" hard most of the time, it's just a series of thoughts that you can dismiss if you choose too. Because the bottom line, that is how I quit. I faced each thought, that lasted moments to minutes depending on how I acted. I was (mostly) in control and made the no choice and the thought simply passed by. Jeez, I think about downing a tub of ice cream most nights but I know this will equal a huge butt so I choose no to that too haha. So I am quite secure that I have the "tools" I need and needed now. A support network, :wub: you guys were crucial to my quit. A list of why I quit. Coping techniques (deep breathing, water etc). Healthy education into nicotine as an addiction. A number of key phrases as above and also "be eternally vigilant", nope shuffles, some bad dancin moves :) I wish I could have arrived at this point feeling a little more dignified and elegant. However I have secured a great group of buddies, a couple of really special people and a new Mum (thanks Nancy, I think we have the same eating habits judging by your junk food plan?) - so I figure I did very well out of this deal! My one piece of really real advice - When it feels hard hold on, it's through the tougher parts of our journey that our quit grows more solid. There is always sunshine after the rain and in the case of giving up smoking there really will be a rainbow. A quit chops and changes, as does life and we just need to grab the equivalent of a life surfboard and ride the waves!!

Oh Jackie I know how hard this is. My heart aches for you and your parents :( (((((Jackie)))))

Jackie...I am so sorry. :(

Marti, congratulations on your 6 month quit. Good for you! Your post is very thoughtful and very inspirational. You are giving voice to a lot of things that helped me quit, only you said it better than I could. Here's to the next 6 months of freedom! [by the way, how did you decide to finish up your redecorated sanctuary? Inquiring minds want to know.]

Marti what a lovely post, and so true, you are doing great and it doesn't matter how you arrive at this point, the important thing is that you arrived and we love you for it xxx

Confidence is an awesome thing... and one of the benefits that no one talks about. Welcome to your new life... you deserve the good stuff.