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So im on day 11 now. The last few days have been some of the worst in my life but im stil feeling very strong in my quit! I no that if i can get thru the last few days (which i have) then i can get thru anything without smoking. Its so true. A situation or problem will not change if u give in and smoke. I now no i can deal with anything whilst bein smoke free and yes, i now no i AM free!

I have literally not sat down today, my son has decided to move in with his girlfriend....she lost her mum when she was 16 and kind of lost her way in the world, to cut a long story short her flat was a disgrace, hadn't been cleaned for years, rubbish piled up, dirty clothes you get the picture. Lovely sweet girl, last 3 weekends I have been down, cleaning, scrubbing, brushing, dusting, doing piles of laundry, Basically showing her what needs to be done. I am exhausted, they both smoke very heavily, came home and I stank to high heaven, I didn't want nor feel the need to have a cigarette, after bleaching skirting boards and doors that are heavily stained nicotine brown well it makes me shudder. My son only works 16 hours a week, and his girlfriend doesn't work at all claims income support, they are living off of £100 per week....sometimes I could just weep. Two lovely young people trying to get on in life. I sneak in bags of food to them and wave off the "how much did that cost mum" sometimes a hug is just enough. Sometimes I look at my son and glimpse the little boy he once was and my heart bursts with love. Sometimes I see the man he has become all the problems he overcame with dignity and strength and I feel so proud. Sometimes I want to shout from the top of the roof that's my son and I love him with all my heart. Sometimes.........

Sending lots of goodness to you. You are so strong, Sammie. Strong and FREE !!! Love, S

Congratulations on your new freedom! Keep writing, all stories here are an inspiration for me :)

Day 1: "Am I really doing this?" Yep. So I posted my first NOPE pledge. I felt awful. My body was yelling "Nat! A cigarette!!! Now!" NOPE. Guys here were awesome. All day long they kept supporting me, answering my questions, keeping me busy. I felt exhausted. Oh by the way! I was wearing the nicotine patch. I thought I couldn´t do it without "some help". I was right. But the help I needed was not a patch. But all the people here cheering me up. At night something happened. I needed my night cigarette. I started panicking. So I posted an S.O.S on the board. I waited for a while. Panic just kept increasing. Until Tiffany came in. She helped me go through it. Until, amazingly, I fell asleep. Thanks Tiff! Day 2: "Why do I feel even worse than yesterday?" I was totally brain fogged. Awful headache. Out of reality (surreal feeling, said one of the girls here). Dizzy. Thirsty. Amazingly thirsty. I was in Quit Train all day long. It was a rainy day and even if I could´ve went out, the weather made it impossible. I kept meeting amazing people. "If you´re going to do this, let´s do it quick, like ripping a bandaid Nat" so I took the patch of. Hm...there was actually no difference at all. Day 3: "Really? I made it to day 3?" The ticker said I did. (Thanks to our official ticker expert! and I had a good time making mistakes with it LOL). People were asking about me. Wow! DD actually started a thread to see how I was doing, This was unbelievable for me. I had some personal conversations that kept showing me that people at this place is just awesome. Each one of you has showed me a different aspect of quitting. You guys made me think and laugh and...just wow and thanks. I started reading the famous Allen Carr´s book. I still don´t have an opinion. I have lots of fun playing chicks or sticks (Guys: come one! We win every time!). I still feel dizzy and brain fogged and tired. The cravings were maybe worse than the first day. But I know one thing for sure: NOPE

See, you are already doing better than me, I don't understand the chicks and sticks game =/ For real though, great great job! Smokers and never smokers don't quite understand how this process works, but us ex smokers know it every step of the way. It was so helpful for me to have a group of people (and Allen Carr) that have walked this same walk. Isolation is not good in times like these. I am proud of you for staying on top of it and making positive changes. They can be tough at first to make, but it's so important.