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My sister just left for the airport to go home. I did NOT fight with her this week. I did NOT smoke. Hooray for both of us! Basically, we stayed out of each other's way. We took different shifts staying with Mom at the hospital. During the few hours that we were in the same house, we stayed in different rooms and ate different meals at different times. We spoke as often as necessary about Mom's condition and care and other than that we had nothing to say to each other. A sad state of affairs for sisters but surely better than the tension and screaming fights we have had in the past. Mom's condition is improving. She was really hit hard by the surgical anesthesia and was semi-comatose for the first 36 hours. Because she was laying in bed for so long being completely inert and non-responsive, my sister and I began to be concerned about her developing pneumonia (the #1 killer of elderly hospitalized patients). So Friday night I stayed in her room all night and woke her up every 2 hours by rubbing ice water on her face so that she would wake up enough to breathe deeply and cough up any accumulated fluids. She got really mad at me for doing that but too bad. It worked. By Saturday afternoon she was awake enough to use that spirometer-thingy to get her lungs functioning so I was happy. Her vital signs are good. She's getting some early PT and hopefully will be able to transfer to a rehab hospital near her home on Monday or Tuesday. I'm telling you, this is one tough old bird! My sister and I did share a laugh the other day when we were marveling at our mother's toughness. We began to speculate that the only thing that would kill Mom would be a stake through her heart! Life is strange. At 92 with many serious injuries and disabilities and the loss of most friends and many loved ones, my mother has said many times that she is "ready to go". And yet each time the opportunity to die presents itself (like 3 heart attacks, a broken neck and now this surgery), she fights her way through it. I guess her life force is still strong in her. It's fascinating to watch. So I'm still in Tampa until Mom gets settled in a rehab facility. But I'm relieved about Mom's condition, relieved that I didn't fight with my sister, and relieved that I didn't smoke. Basically, just relieved all around! :) Thank you all for being there for me and thank you for your good wishes and your prayers. You really helped me to weather some of the rough times this past week. Hugs to all of you fine people ((( :wub: QT Friends!! :wub: )))

I have literally not sat down today, my son has decided to move in with his girlfriend....she lost her mum when she was 16 and kind of lost her way in the world, to cut a long story short her flat was a disgrace, hadn't been cleaned for years, rubbish piled up, dirty clothes you get the picture. Lovely sweet girl, last 3 weekends I have been down, cleaning, scrubbing, brushing, dusting, doing piles of laundry, Basically showing her what needs to be done. I am exhausted, they both smoke very heavily, came home and I stank to high heaven, I didn't want nor feel the need to have a cigarette, after bleaching skirting boards and doors that are heavily stained nicotine brown well it makes me shudder. My son only works 16 hours a week, and his girlfriend doesn't work at all claims income support, they are living off of £100 per week....sometimes I could just weep. Two lovely young people trying to get on in life. I sneak in bags of food to them and wave off the "how much did that cost mum" sometimes a hug is just enough. Sometimes I look at my son and glimpse the little boy he once was and my heart bursts with love. Sometimes I see the man he has become all the problems he overcame with dignity and strength and I feel so proud. Sometimes I want to shout from the top of the roof that's my son and I love him with all my heart. Sometimes.........

Day 1: "Am I really doing this?" Yep. So I posted my first NOPE pledge. I felt awful. My body was yelling "Nat! A cigarette!!! Now!" NOPE. Guys here were awesome. All day long they kept supporting me, answering my questions, keeping me busy. I felt exhausted. Oh by the way! I was wearing the nicotine patch. I thought I couldn´t do it without "some help". I was right. But the help I needed was not a patch. But all the people here cheering me up. At night something happened. I needed my night cigarette. I started panicking. So I posted an S.O.S on the board. I waited for a while. Panic just kept increasing. Until Tiffany came in. She helped me go through it. Until, amazingly, I fell asleep. Thanks Tiff! Day 2: "Why do I feel even worse than yesterday?" I was totally brain fogged. Awful headache. Out of reality (surreal feeling, said one of the girls here). Dizzy. Thirsty. Amazingly thirsty. I was in Quit Train all day long. It was a rainy day and even if I could´ve went out, the weather made it impossible. I kept meeting amazing people. "If you´re going to do this, let´s do it quick, like ripping a bandaid Nat" so I took the patch of. Hm...there was actually no difference at all. Day 3: "Really? I made it to day 3?" The ticker said I did. (Thanks to our official ticker expert! and I had a good time making mistakes with it LOL). People were asking about me. Wow! DD actually started a thread to see how I was doing, This was unbelievable for me. I had some personal conversations that kept showing me that people at this place is just awesome. Each one of you has showed me a different aspect of quitting. You guys made me think and laugh and...just wow and thanks. I started reading the famous Allen Carr´s book. I still don´t have an opinion. I have lots of fun playing chicks or sticks (Guys: come one! We win every time!). I still feel dizzy and brain fogged and tired. The cravings were maybe worse than the first day. But I know one thing for sure: NOPE

Sounds like it went as well as it could have. Your mom is lucky to have you. You are handling things beautifully.

Wow. Great news, Chrysalis. Very good the Two Sisters kept their distance and kept Mother FIRST. You must be exhausted. Make sure you eat something decent and try to get a good nights sleep. Hooray for your Mom...she sounds like she is a powerhouse. Keep your NOPE on, baby. Love, S

Just a quick note to let you know that my mother got through her surgery without any problems. Naturally, she will need close observation and aggressive pain management for the first 72 hours, but so far so good. Thank you all for your prayers and good wishes. I'll write more later. PS-- I'm not smoking and not even jonesing about smoking. Hooray!