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Know any funny jokes or quotes ..

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Some angry guy

with road rage

just yelled out of

his window I'm gonna

make your life a living

hell  I yelled back thanks

but I'm not looking for

a relationship right now

 

 

 

The first testicular guard the cup

was used in hockey in 1874

and the first helmet was used in 1974

that means it only took 100 years

for men to realize that their brain

is also important

CBD  toilet paper 

so you can calm

your ass down is coming

out on the market

 Mrs Ravioli comes to visit her son Anthony

for dinner. He lives with a female roommate Maria.

during the course of the meal his mother Couldnt help but 

notice how pretty Anthony's roommate was.

over the course of the evening while watching 

the two interact she started to wonder if there was

more between Anthony and his roommate than met

the eye reading his moms thoughts Anthony  volunteered

I know what you must be thinking  and Maria and I are just roommates

about a week later Maria came to Anthony  saying  ever since your

mother came to dinner  I've been unable to find the silver sugar bowl

you don't suppose she took it do you I doubt it but I will email her

Dear mom I'm not saying you did take the sugar bowl from my house

I'm not saying you did not take it but the fact remains hat it has been missing every since

you were here Anthony received  a response email from his mom which read

 dear son I'm not saying you do sleep with Maria and I'm not saying you don't

sleep with her but the fact remains that if she was sleeping in her own bed she 

would have found the sugar bowl

Moral is never bull shit your mama

 

 

Edited by Linda
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Some deep thoughts with Jack Handey...

image.png.361569b7241787ac9100ffb9e20bd40e.png

 

image.png.7b3486b428888da016cd98eb0d07bdbb.png

 

image.png.8075acabb2edecc313d29046bc51d556.png

 

image.png.67395faf26bfee4a176ed3db9fb9f23d.png

 

I apologize for the language but this is funny as hell.

 

3p29ot.jpg

The World Health Organization announced that dogs cannot contract COVID-19. Dogs previously held in quarantine can now be released. To be clear, WHO let the dogs out.

 

Since we’re all in quarantine I guess we’ll be making only inside jokes from now on.

 

I’m not talking to myself, I’m having a parent-teacher conference.

 

– Knock knock. Who is there? Seriously, don’t touch my door and get back 6 meters to social distance.

@AceWhite  You missed your calling, you should have been a stand up comedian😂😂😂

A pastor giving a Children's sermon

on vestments asked why do you

think I wear this collar 

one kid answered because

it kills ticks and fleas for 30 days

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