You have to be willing.
Remember you are an addict. Have you been reading here and educating yourself on the addiction?
There is a wealth of info here, if you don't feel like reading - watch some videos.
It hurts my heart that you keep going through those horrible first days over and over.
If you are serious, post an SOS. I've done it and I sounded like a crazy insane maniac, but I didn't smoke.
I owe so much to those folks that stayed there with me, the support was amazing. And they stayed with me until I was Okay.
You can do this, but it has to be your choice if you want to hold on through that rough patch or smoke.