My relapse in 2013 in a nutshell...
...Those 9 months prior that I speak of, although smoke-free, I was still believing somewhere in the back of my mind that cigarettes could offer me something because of my triumphant reunion with them nearly two years prior. It was all a big lie perpetuated by me. When I bought that pack in October I thought it would help. After reading Allen Carr’s book several times and being proactive for so many months, who was I kidding? The only thing I got from it was emptiness. It was at this moment and 19 cigarettes later that I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that cigarettes could not do a damn thing for me. It took a one week relapse for me to 100% believe that no matter what happens in life, no matter how crappy I feel, cigarettes will not do anything. With each and every cigarette I analyzed how I felt. From the very first pull on that cigarette I was ultra aware of how I was feeling. I remembered Allen Carr. I remembered the lies. I remembered all the former smokers in the support group. I recalled all I had read about this addiction. I was still waiting for the enjoyment because I thought it really existed. Not only did I not get one bit of enjoyment from any of it, but I also found out the hard way that there isn’t a single thing enjoyable about smoking. It wasn’t until I truly understood that I got nothing from smoking that I willingly put the cigarettes down without any medication and without a second thought. However, close to the end of that week of smoking I could feel the addiction coming on strong. Had I not chosen to quit smoking on October 7th, 2013, I feel that I would have fallen back into a full blown nicotine addiction and smoking 30-40 cigarettes per day as that was my usual routine. I was probably just a few cigarettes away from this happening and it was scary to relive those feelings of being physically and mentally addicted to smoking constantly needing to feed the throngs of nicotine withdrawal. This is not a place that I ever want to revisit.
Nothing, and I mean absolutely nothing is worse relapsing over. Nothing. Glad to see Tyme is back on the train!! Dig your heels in, tuck your chin and don't give a freaking inch to this addiction. You're smarter than nicotine. You don't have to be stronger to beat it but you can beat it every single time by being smarter than it.
Are You Stronger Than Your Cigarettes?
This video discusses the importance of understanding that you won't be able to quit smoking and stay free by becoming stronger than cigarettes but rather by becoming smarter than nicotine.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uxLxDuTOCT0
A whole video section on relapse. :)
http://www.quittrain.com/topic/4754-videos-addressing-relapse-prevention/