Just can't seem to do it

[shy]

I try the pledge I try to to stay away from them I just can't seem to stop! I just smoked what I'm hoping to be my last cigarette. I want to breathe! I want to smell the world around me! I want freedom! I want to live long enough to see my niece go to college and start her life! But these damn cigarettes are holding me back and I don't know what it's going to take to stay away. My mom smokes in her room and she will never stop so they are always around! I hate the cigs and myself! I know I'm stronger I know I can overcome but something just keeps holding me back! Please help! 

[johnny5]

I agree that you are stronger.  I relapsed several times before quitting.  A lot of us probably did.  But we kept trying.  Quitting smoking will greatly improve your life, just believe that, even if the early days are rough.

 

Sorry I haven't read and participated in your intro thread that closely (New and wondering...) but all the advice you got there is correct.  You will be far better off once you get smokes out of your life.

[Reciprocity]

It's the strong addiction we all have to nicotine that makes quitting difficult puls the daily habit you've developed over the years to integrate smoking into your every day life @shy.  You must break that cycle and repeat it for days and weeks. The longer you do, the easier it gets.

You need to simply make up your mind to never take another puff from a cigarette; NEVER! Yes, it's a horrible battle we must all fight but it IS doable once you decide in your brain that you want to quit more than you want to smoke. Change up your daily routine as much as you can so your not picking up a smoke when you usually do ever day. You must catch yourself every time you think you want to smoke and just say NO! Not this time!!!! The longer you do that, the easier going without a smoke will be. We've all had to face those early days and it's hell sometimes but it IS survivalble and once you have quit for awhile, the strong urge to light one up will weaken because you're no longer smoking as part of you every day routine and you've had time to get nicotine out of your body.

 

There's no magic trick and no short cuts. Quitting is hard work that requires total ongoing focus on what you want to accomplish; finding freedom from those nasty smokes. You must be totally committed and refuse to give in!

[shy]

Thank you for reassuring me that it is doable and it will ease up. I cut a straw to cig length hoping that will help with keeping my hands and mouth busy. I cried so ashamed of my self and I really think something clicked I took a shower to get the smoke smell off of me and now I'm keeping busy reading fiddling with stuff and avoiding my mom's room at all cost. This does get overwhelming but with y'all's support and my strength I'm sure I got it this time. Thank you for helping! I will keep y'all updated.

[Reciprocity]

What you mentioned that you did ... cutting a straw and using it to simulate a cig when you get an urge is a great idea! Just doing some deep breathing when you have a strong urge to smoke works wonders also.

 

You mentioned taking a bath ... that's something else you can do when you get a strong urde to smoke, You can't smoke in the bath/shower right? Keeping busy and distracting yourself are fabulous tools to keep in your quitting tool box as you move forward  

[shy]

And if I ever forget my straw I'll try the pack of jacs I read about on here lol

[Reciprocity]

21 minutes ago, shy said:

And if I ever forget my straw I'll try the pack of jacs I read about on here lol

The JACS  have saved many a quit 

[Reciprocity]

Also, @shy there's a games section here on the form. They're just mindless games but can be fun and keep you occupied and get your mind off smoking

https://www.quittrain.com/forum/16-games/

[shy]

Thank you I got on one of the games the 0-20000 in pictures 

[Cbdave]

Gday

Stop fighting.

This isn’t a fight It’s never an argument. You do that and you’ll tire out cause your playing to the nicotines strengths.

Play to yours. Patients. It’s got 3 to 7 mins. ( yep same to smoke a cig figure!)

You’ve got your life time.

You get hit by an urge. Don’t hide acknowledge it’s an urge.

Then you wait it out. You don’t fight you never argue.

My own distraction was a pack of fruit tic tacs. 
I’d hunt my pockets. When I found them ( of course I knew which pocket)

I’d have an internal conversation with them ( not the urge )

”Thier you are”

” The noise gives you away no use hiding”

”Might be that time”

“O looky theres a fresh pack, gunna have to break the seal”

”’looky forward to smell the pack and having the fist one fresh one cause it’s like opening a fresh coffee jar the first one tastes the best”

I’d read the packets about the bit that each one contained one cal. Remind myself these were truly the breakfast choice of supermodels.

Look away and try to guess the colour. ( you have a one in three chance of red yellow or green)

Cheat and try to get the red one. Lie and say I really wanted the green one anyway.

Remind myself that I was addicted and as an addict I would lie anyway.

It was crazy but it passed the time and at the end the smoking urge had passed ….. Away. Added that Away bit just to be disrespectful to the Urge…. I’m not arguing just disrespectful.

Now this is where the magic begins. When that Urge comes back it will be diminished in its power and strength. You haven't beaten it. Not yet. But soon!

I was always amazed that the “first cig of the day urge” was one of the first to disappear. I know that I’d faced it so often that its power faded fast.  
Hated facing it first in the morning of course but as it weakened I had the power. 
I wasn’t letting it get in the way of …..My Day.

Keep on keeping on.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[shy]

@Cbdave I love this! Thank you so much for sharing that I will definitely have to try that. All of you give such great advice! I'm glad I came to this site!  

And your right I feel it's patience and I have been tested for a long time with patience and I believe it was for this very moment in my life. Thank you 

[Doreensfree]

Shy 

I have often referred to Quitting as the same as the HOKEY COKEY

Yo have to put your whole self in

not one arm or leg

It takes the whole of you

There is only one rule … never smoke again 

No matter what is going on , how your feeling , do  anything but done smoke 

[DenaliBlues]

You can do this @shy!

 

Cravings are not commands. They are just loud obnoxious commercials for junk you don’t wanna buy. Like a big noisy trash truck. You wouldn’t chase a trash truck, would you? No, you’d just let it roll on by. Same with cravings. Just let them roll on by. Stay busy with other things.

 

Another thing to consider is that by smoking occasionally you are probably INTENSIFYING your cravings. It’s counterintuitive, but for most people the weaning or “cutting back” method ends up backfiring. Because you keep re-activating the part of your brain that is used to nicotine, which keeps you in a constant state of withdrawal. And every time you smoke you start the cycle all over again. (Yeah, addiction is just bonkers…) Break the vicious cycle. Give yourself a chance to get through to the other side of withdrawal. Good things await you there!

 

 

 

[QuittingGirl]

I understand how it is to live with a smoker.  My mother and my family own a two family house and she lives downstairs.  I go down there a lot and see her smoking and smell it.  Now it doens't bother me but in the beginning it was very difficult.  You really have to make up your mind and tell yourself that you aren't going to smoke.  The cut up straws are a very good idea.  I used cinnamon sticks in the beginning couple of months.  You have to do everything that you can to distract yourself from smoking.  Play the games, drink lots of water, go for a walk, call up a friend, read, anything to take your mind off of smoking.  The withdrawal will go away and you can do this!  We are all addicts and quit the habit, it's not easy but it is doable!! I was so addicted and I was climbing the walls in the beginning, but the longer you stay quit, the faster the withdrawal will go away.  You have to pysch yourself up to do it.  We can advice you and support you, but the quitting has to come from you.  Stay close to this forum, I truly believe that is what helps.  YOU CAN DO THIS!!

 

Yes, like Denali says the weaning will not work.  I did that for a couple weeks and it was terrible.  I was down to two cigs a day, one in the morning and one at night and I was climbing the walls in between.  You have to give it up cold turkey or use the patch or gum, but you cannot smoke at all.

Edited 4 hours ago by QuittingGirl

[garry mhudson]

All the posts are great and true advice. Keep trying even if you fall and fail. Get back up and find your path to quitting FOR GOOD! It is out there for you. I think you have the right stuff to do this.Best wishes.