sgt.barney

And denial is denial, however you choose to rationalize it. Easy Peasy

Once again: "Open" day on the training schedule this evening. Fast 5k (better than 6:50/mile pace) or moderate/mid-range 5-miler (7:30-ish pace) ? Run is at 10:30 PM tonight. Let the voting begin ... Easy Peasy

Everybody please stand up and recognize the Achievement and Acomplishment of The Train's newest member of The Cadre[1] A round of applause as De La Petra receives her hard won stripes. Welcome aboard, Sgt. Petra. You have earned your stripes. Easy Petra Peasy FOOTNOTE: [1] Definition (2) here

Because addiction. That's why. Easy Peasy

First moderately fast training run of the 2014 season. It's FARKING JULY ALREADY and Sarge still isn't ready to run fast. The Fall Race Season may be doomed already! 5k (3.1 miles) Dreadmill 1% incline/grade @ 21:19 (6:52/mile)

If you "can't wait" then that begs the obvious question ... Why wait? Easy Peasy

So Sarge is taking a "100 pullups for 100 days" challenge. The first three days didn't go so well. 40 the first day (4 sets of 10) 59 the second day (5 sets of 10 and couldn't complete the 6th - only 9 for a total of 59 and the third day was ZERO - Sarge was out on the rock climbing all day in Hocking Hills - there's no pullup bar on the rock and he didn't think to count how many times he did a pullup as he hauled his ass up the wall. Might be a month or two before he can even do 100 in a day. So far still on day zero, 'cause, y'know - not even able to squeeze 100 in a single day. This. Is. Hard. Party Hardy .

As long as it's not testicles, plural, ol' One-Ball doesn't care. :) Easy Peasy

Welcome aboard the <whatever we decided to call it>. You've earned these, Sgt. Nancy: Easy Peasy

Overactive imagination combined with borderline delusion. Ghosts don't real, folks. Even "elementals" Easy Peasy

Nope. Not yesterday Went tonight. 9 days off. NINE FARKING DAYS !! Actually looked at the mileage log and it was 8 days off - today was the 9th. Ran a 4-miler with Mrs. Sarge outside. 4 miles @ 33:30 (8:22/mile) Easy Peasy

Pfffff. Soup. Chili is the way to go for "soup". Sarge used to do Big Beefy Tex-Mex style, but due to fat/cholesterol issues and limiting red meat has switched to a Chili Pollo recipe (Chicken Chili). Easy Peasy

And charging $400 for a tube of lube that costs, like 2 bucks. Easy Peasy

It appears The Sarge got dead seeds. ZERO percent germination so far ... but in nature they usually germinate in July - it's a soil temperature thing. Sarge is gonna wait for the end of the month before giving up and trying again next year. Never give up, never surrender. Easy Peasy

If one quits the Crack Cocaine and switches to only snorting the Powder Cocaine and remain addicted ... has one really quit anything at all? Easy Peasy

Taste The Rainbow! RedCurrants, Yellow Raspberries, BlackCurrants, Gooseberries, Blueberries ... [1] Easy Peasy FOOTNOTE: [1] ... and purple hearts, green clovers and blue diamonds - they're magically delicious!

Sarge would much rather swim in a mud-brown pond with bits of green goop floating around. Those chemicals in the pool ... they're ... not right. The Sarge's first Drill Sargeant used to shout at the top of his lungs: "GOD MADE DIRT, AND DIRT DON'T HURT. TIME TO GET DIRTY, BOYS!" whenever we were about to get wet and crawl around the mud. Easy Peasy

Sarge hasn't run in a week. Uh-oh. Time to fix that .... Easy Peasy

Every time Sarge hears "Romancing The Smoke" or "Romancing The Cigarette" he sees this: (It's Dan DeVito in his role in "Romancing The Stone" [1]... Romancing A Smoke.) Easy Peasy FOOTNOTE: [1] Holy Penguin, Batman -- it that cheezy movie really 30 years old now? Fark! The Sarge has gotten old.

This. A thousand time, this. Easy Peasy

The Sarge finds it better to not attempt to quit but to actually, y'know, quit. Welcome aboard The Quit Train. Keep your hands and arms inside the car at all times. Secure loose items. Strap in, hold on, and enjoy the ride! Easy Peasy

There's an image Sarge will never forget: Jimmy punching a Zebra. Easy Peasy

Welcome to your life, Scott. Easy Peasy