April 23, 201511 yr For those that have followed my tales of woe, (poor bastards lol), but it looks like we FINALLY have a step forward... My Mum has been offered a place and intends to take it. They need to check the resident has left and the state of the place which takes a few days. Then carry out any works and my mum needs to view and agree. Could be 3 weeks to 2 months but we have a movement plan!! I am beyond relieved at the thought of moving my life forwards and being free from the toxic waste that is my own mother. I'm sad I feel like that, that I'm not better than that..but over all that I'm just deeply relieved. I thought I would be sad maybe, but no. I am beginning to imagine how it would be at almost 40 years old to sit at the head of my own dinner table should I wish to. At waking and not being asked for my life plans only to be belittled or gossiped about for it. I want the next illness to not be my problem, for once that jumped up little sister of mine can step up with her holier than doing naf all attitude. I am deeply happy and I can almost taste the freedom from here. I can do my business plans without being called the mystic freaky one. My OCD can abound where she isn't trashing my house and too lazy to carry a cup 20 feet (seriously). It won't smell of smoke anymore!!! I frikkin ABHOR HATE the smell of smoke. I quit and I didn't want it in my house but still she smokes... crazy, utterly crazy. But through it all I did it right, I kept my morals (no sanity but morals) and did the honourable thing I am epicly happy... I'm not sure epicly is a word... Don't care! FREEEEDOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMM is a coming :girl_cray2: :girl_dance: :dance3:
April 23, 201511 yr But through it all I did it right, I kept my morals (no sanity but morals) and did the honourable thing I'm happy you received this news Marti! It will be so good for you and your family. And...this quoted bit is what my rule book deems important in life. A huge 'way to go Marti' for this! When I've gone through rough times, my measuring stick is wanting to look back in 20 years and be proud of how I conducted myself when the pressure was on. You're looking mighty fine Lady. All that said, this news just makes ya wanna dance!!!!
April 23, 201511 yr Author For some reason it mattered to me, it really did. They can call me whatever they want ... you only ever answer to yourself don't you. xx
April 23, 201511 yr Wonderful news, Marti! You kept on the high road, good for you! So happy to hear this news!
April 23, 201511 yr I am over the moon for you sweetheart....you can take your life back.... Freedom indeed..... Marti mum....you should be ashamed of yourself....enough said....
April 23, 201511 yr So happy for you Marti :D Now it's time to live for yourself and your little family. Freedom and peace of mind for you!
April 23, 201511 yr Hey mystic, freaky one. Fancy a cigarette? No? Well done you. Keep level and steady. Things will move on. You, by the way, are brilliant.
April 23, 201511 yr This is awesome news! You are one class act for even having her living with you the way she has behaved. You deserve so much more and I am so thrilled for your family!
April 24, 201511 yr Author You guys are lovely to be happy with me, thank you. Oh she doesn't feel ashamed Doreen, she is still telling everyone I am impossible and a bully. I actually understand now this all revolves around smoking for her. I asked, I begged I yelled for her to just not smoke in the house...it really smells bad...and she felt bullied by that. I feel aggreived that my house stinks and my kids and I are still inhaling poisons, and there's 3 of us, but apparently she matters more. The classic obsessive smoker. She was constantly quitting and cheating, thus putting her in almost permanant withdrawals. To say she has been impossible and downright mental would be an understatement. However she's always had a few screws loose and goes bat shit...then gets over it and forgets it happened (or talks herself out of it mattering) and if you don't instantly move on too it causes a problem. After I quit I realized I wasn't preapred to live with this anymore. The abuse was almost daily, within minutes she's said whatever nastiness came and went from her brain and I refused to accept it. I still feel sad about what I've never had to lose but I think understanding it and dealing with it as an adult myself has given me the mental ammo to be excited about the thought of a brand new life. I will always feel bad for not being able to help but I don't think anyone can ever help her and you must choose a life yourself. x
April 24, 201511 yr I was told something marti...that has stuck....and I remember it ..... When you are holding someone's hand...sometimes you have to let go....better one fall than the both of you..... In other words my sweetie.you have done your very best....now it's time for marti..... Hugs xx
April 24, 201511 yr Yay Marti - so happy for you .... Although it may be just me but I quite like the idea of being called the mystic, freaky one ! :-)
April 24, 201511 yr I was hoping for an offer of...... So I will make one.....you find me a bike to ride over on the wrong side of the road world....promise to wear that black dress again and get Chris a couple days off to show me around....and I will bring my own pillow to smother and end your problem this weekend. You and mrs can doll up while I dig a hole and we can all go out drinking with the queen of Scotland in his silver bmw little bus.
April 24, 201511 yr really happy for you Marti....you went above and beyond for your mother....more than most people would. You are a compassionate and loving woman...we are lucky to know you and your mom and sister are lucky to have u. They may make fun...who cares. My kids and husband also teased me for years calling me a kook....but guess what? Now they are saying I was not such a kook and they are inspired by me. Imagine that. People make fun of what they don't understand or what's not the "normal" cause we live in a society that is afraid to be different. Love you girl! xoxo
April 24, 201511 yr Author So the house is clear of the tennant (i really hope they didn't die there, my mystic freakiness will freak out lol). The place is in a good state of repair. All this is according to the housing association that own the property and basically lease it long term to the council (our mini version of states I guess, we have counties) and it looks like we might move faster, in 2-3 weeks if there are no hold ups..... I don't want to get my hopes up, just in case. I am better with dealing with a worse case scenario... but what if?? Please send up whatever you do, prayers, thoughts, strength for me...that it moves quickly. Because my goodness, what if this is really real and I can actually live my own life for the first time in many years....It's all still a little unbelievable....
April 25, 201511 yr I just saw this...Marti Really this is fabulous news, I am glad you shared your happiness, it is good to know finally some light at the end of that long tunnel, and it isn't a train... While I don't understand what makes people tick, I second what Doreen says ; shame...and will leave it there. Best to you and your kiddos :) xxx Markus
April 25, 201511 yr Author Thanks guys. New update (all or nothing here apparently!). Letter through saying she can view tues and if she likes it, get the keys next friday!!
April 25, 201511 yr Thanks guys. New update (all or nothing here apparently!). Letter through saying she can view tues and if she likes it, get the keys next friday!! brilliant....it's getting better all the time....I can feel your excitement from here....xx
April 25, 201511 yr Make her like it Perhaps a pinch of salt in her tea this week? Help her find your place less agreeable? B)
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