Kris

@KEL Sorry to tell you but I do feel like an old lady. I am on social security, widows benefits that start at 60. Not something I planned to do early but my health went south, so here we are. I am trying hard to keep it together but having a hard time right now.

I am really struggling right now. I want to smoke but I will not do it. It is hard to come here and admit that everything in body and soul want to smoke. I feel that I have been so strong for so long I should be past the hard part but I am not. I feel like a failure even though I have not smoked, i am guilty of the desire to smoke. Maybe tomorrow I will feel better tomorrow.

Closing thought for the day, I am struggling everydayl I just wanr to be the person I was. I was a smolker and that is no longer an option. I feel like my skin is breaking away from my body, my brain is under constant pressure, my migraines are worse, I do not sleep well, I have no energy. I have seen the doctor. I am just tired and want a littlw piece, I want sleep without waking up every hour. I want someone to help me pick up the pieces so I can keep going. Why is it so hard? When will it stop being such a challenge? I am doing it but I am exhausted. I think it will make me feel better just to tell you my ugly truth.

@intoxicated yoda I get it, like I said. I was sick fpr many years and seen multiple doctors until I was able to make someone really listen. Same thing, over a year having hip pain, seeing my primary care, she did not realize how bad it was until I had no reflex in my right knee, she thought it was my spine, turns out it was avacular necrosis, I had lost the blood supply to my hip and it collapsed. There was alot that happened then. In the end I had to have a total hip replacement but that was a vacation compared to the pain I had before. I tell you this because sometimes you have to go through hell to find a doctor that listens to you. I finally started to write down everykthing so I would not forget things that they should know. I will still say you need to find the right doctor.

@intoxicated yoda Just wanted to check and see if you have seen your doctor about the issues.I had digestive problems for years. Finally saw a gastro doctor that listened and scheduled a colonoscopy. Nothing appeared wrong to his eyes but he took biopsies of my colon. That finally confirmed a diagnosis of lympocitic colitis. He put me on a drug for that and it all got better. He said I would have the potential of flare ups but this has not happened. I went for years having to know where the ladies room was, I even had my route to and from work planned out for available bathrooms. See a doctor!

@intoxicated yoda I can't speak to the coffee thing, I am a hot tea with cream girl. I do drink a lot of diet coke. That would be main caffiene source. I am a big carb eater, just easier to make toast and eat cereal Can't deny my love of salty crunchy snacks. I have found that I am craving more fresh vegetables. I have got that stocked up. I think a protein and a salad will make a good dinner. I usually keep the meat to 4 to 6 ounces. I have the habit of eating a good meal for dinner but I tend to snack when I can't sleep. I wish I could be as strong in my diet as my quit. My most important thing right now is my quit. I can take small steps with the other stuff. I am proud of your quit and your weight loss.

Is a brownie dessert made with chocolate?

FOUR MORE YEARS! FOUR MORE YEARS! You have won the presidential reward. Congratulations on a well run campaign!

8. to dispose of used cooking oil (Sorry it is Texas, home of the chicken fried steak.)

@TONY Good Morning to you. Glad you had a great night. I am glad that you are not struggling with your quit. There may be rough waters ahead but know that we are here if you need us. Have a wonderful day!

NOPE and still going

Trying to sleep, which runs from me. I would love a good thunderstorm. At least in my part of the world we are getting some winter temps. I love the cold!! So funny talking about summer and winter in the same conversation. At least we are together in one thing, to help everyone quit smoking!

@Sal,You are just a couple of teenagers in mad love. It is so wonderful to know Mrs. Sal is Anita. I was also a bride of 31 years when I lost my husband, as they call it here high school sweethearts. We started dating at 15 years old, we could not even drive yet. Sounds like you were the same. It makes it more important to get through this so the both of you have each other until a very, very old age. I hope I can be of support while you quit!

@Sal Hi Mr and Mrs Sal, Trying to stay up late to check in and make sure your are both doing okay. As I have said before I am happy that both of you have chosen this path. It is not without challenges but you can get through it. When my husband was sick we kind of took turns, we could not go off the rails at the same time. We both had our struggles with what was happening but we would hold each other up during the hard times. Just a piece of advice, when one is weak and suffering the other must take the burden up to lift the other. Trust me, it can make all the difference, I am sure you know this if you have spent a lifetime together. It does matter to me that both of you make this goal. It will give you great joy and peace to know that you care enough about each other to get this done. Just know you are in my thoughts and prayers!

@kenzie_peyton, So nice to meet a fellow Texan. I am an old lady, 62, been there and don't want to be there again. Gonna give you the truth straight up. You are so young, you have got to stop smoking right now. If you do not you will become one of us old people around town coughing like a lung is going to pop out any minute. Don't tell me you have not seen/heard it. I am so grateful I do not do that anymore. It is enough to make people sick. Next thing, you think it won't happen to you. If you continue to smoke you will have the most horrible wrinkles across your upper lip. When you see old ladies whose lipstick bleeds up into those wrinkles, you will not have to worry about that. Of course, the main thing is your health but you are a beautiful young woman and you will be so all of your life if you quiit for good.

Okay, I am going to ask, what is happening in your part of the world? They say one in three in our area are testing positive for this new omicron. I decided I had to go out to the grocery store today for fresh veggies and milk. I wore my mask and most were. The store was not crowded so that made me feel at ease. First thing I see just a couple of blocks from my home is a free testing site. Cars are backed up in the center lane and police are there to direct traffic in and out.if the parking lot. I had never seen this before, not even at the beginning of the pandemic. I think if might be a response to the kids going back to school after the holiday but I am not sure. At least I got that out of the way and won't need to go back out for a couple of weeks.

What a blessing. All the hard work and sacrifice you did have brought you to this point. I pray that I will continue to have the strength and determination you have shown!

@Opah, So sorry you did not bring home the bacon, ribs, ham or the other wonderful parts to fill your freezer. The important thing is you had a good time despite the weather. I am sure that played a big part in your sucess. Count your blessings as you got time to get friendly with your new lady, have time to reflect on your life and sucess in all things. It is the best vacation, when you are doing something you enjoy and have real down time to think about how blessed you are. True relaxation is hard to come by.

@Dawna Sending this out to you. I see you have joined the site, our newest member. I am Kris from Texas. nothing special to say about me other than I have been smoke free since June. The people here have been of unending support in my quit. There is always someone here or checking in if you need us. It may sound silly that a bunch of people from all over the world can help you but they can. Sometimes you need help to get through the cravings. Sometimes you just need to talk about things that are going on in your life. They are here for all of it. You just have to reach out and they will be there to listen, to offer advice, to give you support in this or any challenge. You must want to quit or you would have not joined the site. I hope you will let us help you anyway we can.

That is so true @TONY everything feels so wierd to me. I have mentioned this in other times on the board. Just yesterday we were young, now time tells us we are old, but I still think of myself as the person I was. It takes time to accept that we don't look the same, we have all these health issues and many of us have lost our partner. Our brains just keep on ticking that we are the same. We can still do the things we did in youth. You are lucky your thing is fishing. I want to iceskate, roller skate. dance all night but the old body does not want to take the chance. I could crab or fish with access but have none. I am trying to find a new hobby.

I fish a lot, the restaurants used to love me until COVID. Just kidding, I did fish and camp all the time. It was our family outing time and vacations. The best was going to the grandparents in Maryland, fishing and crabbing. It started my love of seafood.

@TONY Good to hear from you and you are doing so well. Does make you proud, to know you can do it. I think that is the one thing that keeps us going. We thought we could not do it and then here you are at one month down. You have got this!

@Sal I am so happy for both of you! You both are taking on a big challenge together and you will do great things together. I am excited for the wonderful future that is there for the taking. Everyone will be here to offer advice and support. The only flame needed is your love for each other.

Congratulations on three months, the next three will fly by!

@SalJust wanted to Happy New Year! Hope you are still with us, having faith in yourself. You can be who you want to be this year. I have gained so much in the last six months, better health, the options to go places and do things without worry. Overwhelming strength and confidence that I can do things I never would have tried before. We are expecting a cold winter storm here for the next couple of days. I do not have to go out in the cold anymore. I will be sipping a cup of tea here in the house. Talk to us, we just want to help.