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Know any funny jokes or quotes ..

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When celebrating my 25th anniversary, I looked at my wife and said,
"Honey, 25 years ago, I lived in a one-room apartment, watched a 15-inch
black-and-white TV, and drove a rusty old car. But, every night,
I slept with a gorgeous blonde. But, now you're ageing, and I figure
you're not keeping up your appearance like you did all those years ago,
and I'm not too happy about that."

 

My wife looked back at me and said, "It's true I may not be what I used to be in the looks department but, if you sleep with a gorgeous blonde tonight, I'll see that, once again, you're living in a one-room apartment, watching a 15-inch, black-and-white TV,
and driving a rusty, old car."

Paddy says "Mick, I'm thinking of buying a Labrador.  "Bugger that" says Mick, "have you seen how many of their owners go blind?"

"Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated."

image.thumb.png.738006902d07c4c8fe5280c12771d724.png

My mind is like an internet browser. At least 19 open tabs, 3 of them are frozen, and I have no clue where the music is coming from 🤪

A second grader came home from school and said to her grandmother, "Grandma, guess what? We learned how to make babies today." The grandmother, more than a little surprised, tried to keep her cool. "That's interesting." she said. "How do you make babies?" "It's simple," replied the girl. "You just change 'y' to 'i' and add 'es'."

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