20 minutes ago, robin0212 said:

As a newbie I'd say I'm crazy then because I still kind of miss that friend ugh!!!

I totally get it but it will eventually go away and we won't miss it, and it won't be a friend of ours anymore!! We are still newbies but eventually we will be oldies....hahaha!!!!😁

Everyone is different when you get the lightbulb moment ..

To get there all you need to do is 

Never smoke again 

Us oldies support and wait for that moment to happen which it will ,we can promise you that ..

Your doing great newbies and are at jyst wherevyour meant to be along your journey s ..

Freedom is full steam ahead xx

5 hours ago, Doreensfree said:

Everyone is different when you get the lightbulb moment ..

To get there all you need to do is 

Never smoke again 

Us oldies support and wait for that moment to happen which it will ,we can promise you that ..

Your doing great newbies and are at jyst wherevyour meant to be along your journey s ..

Freedom is full steam ahead xx

Thanks Doreen!! 😁

I want to have a smoke tonight!!! I'm not going to, because I don't have any cigs, and I'm certainly not going out to get them!!  I'm just going through a little, not a meltdown, just a little urge!  I think it's normal?  Is it normal? I know it's only 2 1/2 months, yeah so it's not easy as all of you know....but I'm doing the best I can!!

 

Thanks for all your help, my friends!!! 🥰😁

 

I guess this will pass too, like it did in the beginning!! 

Thanks for listening everyone!! 😁

What you're experiencing is normal @Sandi149, there's something about the three's that trigger craves.  No one knows why but it happens to most of us. And yes, this too shall pass. Glad you vented and got it off your chest hopefully that helped  

3 minutes ago, jillar said:

What you're experiencing is normal @Sandi149, there's something about the three's that trigger craves.  No one knows why but it happens to most of us. And yes, this too shall pass. Glad you vented and got it off your chest hopefully that helped  

Thanks Jill, what do you mean by the 3s? Do you mean that I'm almost at 3 months quit?

 

Yes, it passed...it just happened so quickly and I have to say that sometimes, I really do want to have a smoke.  Is this normal after 2-3 months?  I don't have the urge all the time, thank goodness, but once in a while I do get it!!

Yes, sandi. Three days, three weeks, three months.  And yes it's normal well past three months. That's why we recommend the One Year Commitment to stay here close to your support for the first year of your quit to help you through any triggers that could come up. 

Glad it passed already. That's the beauty of having time quit on your side, the craves even if they are strong, they don't last are are much easier to swat away than they were in the beginning  

42 minutes ago, jillar said:

Yes, sandi. Three days, three weeks, three months.  And yes it's normal well past three months. That's why we recommend the One Year Commitment to stay here close to your support for the first year of your quit to help you through any triggers that could come up. 

Glad it passed already. That's the beauty of having time quit on your side, the craves even if they are strong, they don't last are are much easier to swat away than they were in the beginning  

Thanks Jill!!! I am certainly not going anywhere....I am stuck on this wonderful forum!!! Thank you so much for your help!!  Yes, the cravings are much less now then they were in the first month!!  That was horrible...but I still do get them from time to time.  I'm hoping in another few months, they will really be gone. 

 

You, Doreen, Brioski, Overcome,  Reciprocity, Gus, DenaliBlues, intoxicated yoda, johnny5,  and everyone else who has been so nice to me and helping me...sorry if I forgot other people's names, but thank you to everyone on this forum who has helped me in the past 2 1/2 months!!! 🥰🥰

I’m just thankful that YOU are here Sandi. We all really do  want to see everyone succeed in kicking nicotine’s butt. Sticking around this forum for at least a year is grand advice. Those craves will pop up. Further apart as time goes along and the duration does shorten but those things can still be pretty powerful and if you dwell on it, can also be hard to overcome. A good time to whip out the old toolbox that saw you through hell. Getting on here and talking yourself through it helps a lot also. You did good! 🤗

I was always surprised at how gradual the progression of quitting was. Always expected things to resolve themselves a lot faster than what was actually the case. I thought by the time I was where you are now I would have transitioned from smoker to quitter completely but nope, that wasn't the case. Although I didn't necessarily have strong cravings every day any longer, I did still have challenges to my quit off & on. Both situational & seasonal issues would rear their ugly heads from time to time but as others have said, things do get easier to manage with time and by applying the tools you have already developed, you too will get past these challenges still ahead and you have all of us to lean on for support ... we have ALL been there @Sandi149! You'll be fine!

Hi Sandi

Your just where you need to be.

Be gentle on yourself ..look how far you have come ..

You are going to get urges now and again ..look how long  you smoked..decades ..

Keep telling yourself it will pass .

The urges will get less and less 

and weaker and weaker..

Your doing brilliant ..feel proud !!

 

Hi Sandi. Sorry you were having a rough time. It's so awful how we are blindsided by cravings so unexpectedly. You've gotten such great advice here!  Those darn threes are sooo sneaky. Keep up the great work you are doing!!

Thanks everyone!! 😁 I'm doing better today and the urge didn't last very long last night.  The first time I quit, I remember by 3 months I really didn't get many urges and it was so much easier back then.   I wonder why?  Maybe because I was on Chantix? What do you think?

At 3-4 months I remember being startled by the realization that I had not thought about smoking at all for a full day.  It put some wind in my sails for sure.

1 hour ago, Sandi149 said:

Thanks everyone!! 😁 I'm doing better today and the urge didn't last very long last night.  The first time I quit, I remember by 3 months I really didn't get many urges and it was so much easier back then.   I wonder why?  Maybe because I was on Chantix? What do you think?

I don't know if it was the Chantix that made a difference last time you quit or not. I've often heard that when a person attempts to quit multiple times, their quits can be, and often are, different each time. Sometimes harder or easier than the previous quit attempt.

 

My own belief is that quitting is such a complex mix of not only what's inside ourselves at any given time but also what's going on around us at that specific time in our lives that our reaction to quitting is bound to be different each time we experience it. 

Chantix is/was an anti-depressant, so you are not in your right frame of mind when on it.

I think chantix was discontinued because of all the mental issues people were having while using it. 

Way to stay strong @Sandi149

Edited August 10, 20233 yr by overcome

3 hours ago, overcome said:

Chantix is/was an anti-depressant, so you are not in your right frame of mind when on it.

I think chantix was discontinued because of all the mental issues people were having while using it. 

Way to stay strong @Sandi149

When I was on it, I only had a couple of side effects.  In the morning after I took my first pill I would get very nauseous for about a half hour.  I had to lie down until it passed, and I think I had the nausea every morning for about a month.  I also had very vivid dreams and some of them were very weird.  Not nightmares though, just very vivid and colorful and kind of in 3D....I didn't mind them at all...LOL!!  It didn't really put me in a bad frame of mind, but it did make me forget that I wanted to smoke.  It really helped me a lot.  Wellbutrin is also used to quit smoking.

 

I believe it was discontinued but not sure if it was because of the mental issues, or because they said it causes cancer, but so do cigarettes.  And, it wasn't like people were on it for that long, it was only a 3 month program.  It certainly worked for me back then. It's unfortunate that I went back, but now I'm on the train again!! 😁

Hey, Sandi. Glad that you are staying committed!

 

I agree with @Reciprocity that every quit is different. My own experience is that this quit (after quitting for years and then relapsing for years) is much harder than previous ones. I think that last relapse put my addiction on steroids, it came screaming back much stronger. So the cravings are likewise stronger, more devious, more tenacious.

 

But I am stronger, more resourceful, and more tenacious, too. So are you, Sandi. And we have the Train this time, thankfully. With a little help from our friends, we can beat this addiction once and for all. Stay strong!

You’re doing great, Sandi! Even if it doesn’t always feel like that, you are. The threes got me, too. But it’s not as bad I think as in the beginning, but it tries to getcha.  I’m still crying sometimes wanting one now, at 5 1/2 months lol.  I don’t know if the chantix helped you “more” per say, but like the others are saying, quits are just different.  When those craves hit, man, it seems like whatever we’re doing’s “not working”, but it is. We’re still ex/non smokers and we’re ok. The air cig (I have a straw w cotton in the middle and another straw cut in the middle) reallllyyyy helps me still. Jill used one (her JAC) and hers was invisible so she never lost hers 😂 smart girl. 

Hope you’re continuing to do well, you’re doing great

Thanks everyone!  I know I am doing much better than I did. 😁 That first month was just terrible and now it's definitely not as bad, thank goodness! 

One step at a time Newbies x

Hi everyone,

 

Have you ever dealt with a friend/family member who has given you a very hard time, (not involving cigs),  BUT, giving you a horrible hard time and they don't want to talk to you for days?  

 

Right now I'm dealing with a friend who is doing this to me. The other day I made an idiotic mistake in my home. I was acting like an A$$ and I did  a stupid thing and I admitted that I did a stupid thing. Unfortunately, she and her husband don't want to talk to me, but yet, in the past they have made several mistakes as well and I forgave them.

 

I am trying to deal with this...AND....YAY FOR ME, I HAVEN'T SMOKED!! But, how do I deal with this... BTW, my friend is a 53 year friend, I know her since 1970 and her husband is a 46 year friend!! Basically, a lifetime...and I am getting ignored and a hard time from them.

 

I need your help!! Thanks so much everyone!!!!🥰

Not knowing why they're ignoring you I'd say that that happens with friends from time to time. Just let a few days pass and go about your life. When they're ready they'll forgive you. No use to keep trying and just getting yourself upset if they're still angry right?

You should be super proud of yourself for keeping your awesome quit through it

I’m sorry that you are dealing with this Sandi. All I can say is that if you have sincerely apologized for your mistake it is best to let time work but if they choose to not accept your apology there is really nothing you can do but let your long time friend know by note or otherwise that your door will always be open to her and that you will truly miss her friendship. I’ve forever lost friends this way but I’ve also had some come around after some time. It really just depends on the offended persons own ability to forgive. I do hope you guys can remain friends. Yeah, no need to try to replace them with your old friend Nicodemon. He never helped nobody. 

So sorry to hear this is happening, Sandi. Good on you for keeping your quit regardless of emotional stressors.

 

I've definitely hit some hard times with friendships. It can be very painful. I also have felt guilt over things I handled badly. I agree with @jillar that it's wise to give everyone a little time to cool down for starters. Then I am a firm believer in unequivocal apologies - stating what I did wrong and showing an understanding of the impact of my actions, along with an expression of love. No caveats, "even thoughs," or "buts." Sometimes that kind of accountability helps to (re)build trust. It also helps me sleep at night in terms of my own conscience. Hopefully the ice will thaw between you and your friends. A lifelong bond is something to cherish, and I hope it can be resilient. 

 

In the meantime, shout out a few extra NOPES. They're good for the soul. 

 

Hang in there.