darcy

well, I haven't smoked in over 24 hours. course, I haven't done much except sleep, hydrate and whine. Have read some on this site. I have read and reread my reasons for quitting. I have tried to compose a pre SOS to myself. Arguing with myself steadily this morning. My conviction of "I do not smoke" doesn't ring true today. Why go through all the effort only to fail later at an inconsequential upset where I choose to pick up? On the up side. I have not smoked for over a day. I am not eating my way through cravings.

anchovy

-18

Wake up .... want to smoke. I don't smoke. feet on floor .... want to smoke. I don't smoke. skip coffee ... want to smoke anyway. I don't smoke. find quit train, jump around awhile.... hmmm, I don't smoke. eat something ... want to smoke. I don't smoke. sit outside to read ... want to smoke. I don't smoke. drink water, drink tea, make juice I have been free for the better part of an entire day. and the junkie mind says...so what? We've been running together since you were young. I've always been a comfort and there and nonjudgemental. I DON"T SMOKE.

Thanks to each of you for suggestions and ideas. I'm plugging along. Trying to do the 10 ways to use this site list. Having trouble creating a ticker, despite the directions here link. lol. Little willingness to sit with frustration right now. Just keep jumping around to topics on this site and reading. addiction. Amazing how I have been able to ignore the knowledge I hold in favor of being a slave to nicotine. Who the heck am I? What did I do to/with darcy? Anyway.... Plugging along. been about 12 hours. Hydrating and hoping to sleep. Grateful to have this place and the people here to just talk with, listen to and keep marching with.

Bewitched rabbits entertain wise salmon. drone

nope.

Thank you, Sazerac. It's helpful to hear. now align beliefs with real self and carry on.

Thank you for the advice. This seems a path I can accomplish. I am a bit mortified to utilize the people/connections here. My past efforts have found me weepy, self pitying, and full of recriminations. My head and the addiction are the things to outsmart. Shame and guilt....I'm sure you've heard this before. Hoping to learn to celebrate small victories and take those as progress and evidence of my real self thriving.. In my more cynical moments I tend toward; why bother? I have already done the damage. In my authentic moments I tend toward; Stop digging, put down the shovel, breathe, THRIVE ... you still have health and can revel in the joy of being free. Thanks to all for doing what you do here. I am grateful to have your support.

Hello, I am quitting smoking tomorrow. I had found you, fabulous people, and this litany of resources five years ago, then threw away my quit (months). Emotional blow with knee jerk response of I'd rather hurt me and remain appearing somewhat in control (ha ha ha, as she cries) than completely blow up in immature (again the laughter and perspective) manners. Through away another one (9 hours) this morning. Logged on here and have renewed hope (wish I could also say faith) in my resolve and ability/willingness. Have very limited data, so being mindful of which Joel videos to choose. I know the key is to not put any nicotine into my body. Rollercoastering on the ideas of can't or won't, willing and able or unwilling and able. Have smoked for 38 years, with around 3 years off for intelligent thinking/choices/behavior in the mix. Not yet savvy on site protocol and where to post and do things. guidance appreciated. Big thank you for the how to use this site to quit thread. Best regards, darcy