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Lilly

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Everything posted by Lilly

  1. Simple but effective Whispers. You're proof of that.
  2. I really wanted to ask if you were at the river with your whoppers but it just sounds wrong ????? x
  3. Thanks Sazerac, Jane and Doreen. I'm buckled up and ready to go ?
  4. Linda I don't think you are going to give in I think you are just overwhelmed. There is only so much one person can take emotionally and you've reached your limit today. What you really need right now is a darn good hug and somebody to take some of the load from you. We can spend so much time looking after everyone else and forget to look after ourselves. I'm glad you posted because being able to actually get your feelings out really helps. Wish I could actually help by waiting in line for you x
  5. I pledge that no matter what life brings me today I will not smoke ?
  6. Jillar that bracelet is getting its first charm next month if it kills me ?? Thanks Jo and don't worry I got the trusty quit box back out ?
  7. I bought myself a First Class ticket on the Quit Train and am looking forward to the ride. It's taken me longer than I expected to board but took Jillars advice and waited until I was really ready. So here I am and I'm feeling really positive and happy that I no longer smoke ?
  8. Thinking of you Linda and hope you are ok. We are all here for you whenever you need us. It will be a long path but you'll never be walking it alone.
  9. I will Sazerac and sooner rather than later. I have been referred to the hospital and they will do a biopsy which apparently they do as standard and not because the doctor was concerned. I'm going to be fine but if I continue smoking I might not get a second chance.
  10. Thanks everyone. I will be back and I will quit. Just need to get my head back in the right place. Jane don't stay away. I posted on a quit smoking forum that I was chain smoking. You took your kid gloves off not to kick me but to help me. After all it is a quit smoking site at the end of the day. I just wasn't seeing anything clearly yesterday. I hear you today.
  11. Thanks for all the messages. Just wanted to let you all know I do have a mass in my mouth but it certainly doesn't appear cancerous. She felt my neck and said my lymph nodes are fine whatever that means. Just didn't want anyone worrying.
  12. I completely understand addiction Jane which is why I said what I did about the fear but smoking at the same time. I hope nobody else decides to take the kid gloves off because right now isn't the time to kick me. If all people can see in that post is a relapse then I hope they will just walk away and not contribute.
  13. I feel absolutely disgusted at myself but I'm chain smoking, crying and feeling terrified. I have had a sore in my mouth for weeks and I don't have my own teeth so at first thought that was the cause. I can feel it with my tongue and this morning it feels much bigger. I got the thought of it being cancer in my head and the thought has spiralled out of control. I can't tell anyone as it just doesn't seem right to scare everyone else. I have got doctors at 3.50 but my mind is just going into overdrive. The stupidest part of all is I'm sobbing at the thought of cancer, but lighting up the very thing that causes it. I'm sorry I'm just really scared and needed to talk to someone but this probably isn't the right place.
  14. Oh Linda my heart goes out to you. I am positive you bring as much love to her life as she does to yours. I will keep you all in my thoughts and prayers x
  15. I was really scared logging in but I'm so glad I did. Thanks everyone.
  16. And I promise you will see all 12 charms Jillar ?
  17. Agree with everything Jane especially this - This time we commit to the quit! we embrace the quit! we love the quit! This quit is the one that will save your life.
  18. I don't keep any cigarettes Pottanramu. That would be a disaster waiting to happen. I'm staying well away from alcohol Whispers.
  19. Thanks Reci. Pottanramu I'm a bit confused why you did a laughing smiley?
  20. I am sure you all guessed that I smoked on my birthday due to my lack of updates. I drank way too much and learnt that I can't be trusted around alcohol. I wasn't sure whether I should show my face here again and feel really embarrassed. I realised today that beating myself up was not helping in any way. I was just running towards smoking and getting further away from a quit. So I've stopped the self pity and restarted the clock.
  21. You all are so thoughtful. Just wanted to pop in and give a final wave off as leaving now ??
  22. Thanks for the posts and the cake is making me drool. I slept through most of Day 1 but made it into Day 2. I feel completely out of it. If you've ever had an operation you will know that awful feeling as you come round. I feel like that every minute. I don't know if I'm capable of putting my own shoes on the right feet this morning. Today I'm off for my birthday so won't post again until Monday. Have a lovely weekend everyone. ?
  23. I had the best night's sleep ever last night. I think it's probably because it was the first night I hadn't gone to bed with my head full of "I need to quit" thoughts. I lay in bed for an hour before I felt brave enough to get up. Now I'm up I'm feeling a bit lost. I'm going to go back to bed as I feel safest there. I'm a bit sweaty (sorry for that image), my legs feel a bit shaky and my heart is racing like I've just had an enormous fright. On the positive side I'm not crying which I did a lot of last time. The plan today is to try and sleep as much as I can. It will pass the time hopefully. Tomorrow I'm off for my birthday week-end so at least I'll be busy for 3 days. In half an hour I will be at the 12 hour mark. I have got sheets of paper in my quit box with the numbers 1-24 and every hour I cross off the hour I have completed. It felt good to cross off 9 hours in one go this morning. Will shout if I need you ?
  24. I'm laughing at the starter kit because that's not far off what mine looks like ?? Thanks for cheering me on. It is so nice to have such great support. I think the excitement has worn me out a bit so I'm going to go to bed ? One and a half hours already so by the time I get up I should be at least 10 hours in ? Night all.
  25. I am doing my NOPE as there's still 1 hour and 15 minutes left today for my first quit day ???

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QuitTrain®, a quit smoking support community, was created by former smokers who have a deep desire to help people quit smoking and to help keep those quits intact.  This place should be a safe haven to escape the daily grind and focus on protecting our quits.  We don't believe that there is a "one size fits all" approach when it comes to quitting smoking.  Each of us has our own unique set of circumstances which contributes to how we go about quitting and more importantly, how we keep our quits.

 

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