Still winning

Jackie I totally missed this, am so so pleased you came out the other side. It passes, it always passes and for a moment...we kinda forget that...just a thought...a bad thought but they all fall away and leave a beautiful sense of freedom and you deserve that! Pleased you fought, pleased you let people carry you, that's amazing... Much love to you beauty. x

So happy for you and your quit Lace. Isn't it quite amazing what perfect strangers who can understand can do to support you, stuns us all I think but the beauty of this network is exactly that. Well done beautiful lady. xx

Hi Crys, Thanks for asking, I am still struggling a little but nowhere near as over whelmed as I was. My mother hasn't found anywhere acceptable yet. She is limited as she can't afford regular rent so must wait for a place to be available through the council (the local authorities) and that takes as long as it takes for people in the accomodation to frankly move or die. Harsh but true. My 9 year old has gone and said how awkward it is, to her fathers new bit...that stings me as a Mum. Not because she hasn't said it to me as she has, but that it's affecting her enough for her to voice it to others. I have written to the council saying they must help urgently or I will hand my notice in here and move thus making her homeless without any waiting...I am hoping it doesn't come to this but am prepared to do it if there is no end in sight by the end of march. Started a computer course last week :) Can't jobhunt until I my Mum has gone really as I am her carer, despite not wanting to be, I am responsible enough that I respect she does need some help and I want peace of mind out of this whole thing. Considering other courses to keep building my skill sets ready for work, also to get me a break from being stuck in so much. Volunteering back at the school now and loving it once a week. Insanity class once a week on an evening class and yoga most other days. Waiting for weather to break a little more and maybe go out running, or if not walking. I feel very trapped here and the air and space combined with fitness really resets me. Just timings is all. Trying to stay upbeat but keep having low spots. This time next year none of this will matter. in 11 sleeps time I will have quit for 1 year. I'm holding my own. x

How we doing this morning Rob?

nope

There's no actual bumps? lol.

I liked your comment so you could come back and read this. It takes strength to admit you fell off and it takes strength to get back up. But more than that, Rob you are worth our time! You are worth mine! I gave you that number genuinely, anytime buddy, honestly. I will see you tomorrow. xx

Aww Rob, you shoulda called me, I promise I would have supported you. Remember if another trigger startsto take you yeah. xx See ya tomoz, bright and early. You can do this, trust yourself more, it's honestly great after the wobbles, trust me if you don't trust you this time my lovely. xx

Till one year. Going to bring myself back up now. Can't be sad for long...got a treat to plan no idea what still? As I come towards this mark in time I can't help but remember where I was a year ago today. With 12 days till the quit I had already tried patches and been allergic, so by now a year ago I was taking champix, desperate for that "moment" when I knew I could quit. It made me feel so sick, the dreams were mental, I felt like I was beginning to suffer some depression...I knew I would follow it through waiting for that elusive quit...it must be somewhere right. I had done a healing course, I knew it was time. I just honestly had no idea how it actually worked...how did one simply not smoke again? I'd been relapsing since the previous July, quit, fail, quit smoke. It had been a joke. What made the difference 11 days on is finding a tribe to support me. The strange thing is I went in hard with the supporting others, day 2, I gave every sad story to help others and knew I'd found my feet in a quit and my place in a support circle. Probably the first time if I'm honest, that I'd ever actually allowed anybody to support me. I am massively independant and self sufficient. It felt odd to be so confused and weak but good to know others would hold me up when I needed and virtual hi five every ok day and celebration. It's why the celebrations are so big to me. So 12 sleeps to go until my 1 year celebration.

2 months is amazing work rooster!! You should be so proud of yourself. xx

So happy to see this Lace. Loving you having this awesome celebration and look forward to following in your footsteps in a few days :) Much love beauty. x

That's beautiful and may get me out of a hotel...Where we meeting?? lol

You first Dors :) I think we will happily toast each other this month. xx

nope

hahaha, willing to take additional options on board :)

13 sleeps till one year. So massively overwhelmed I have no plans at all. The nearest weekend will be mothers day (laughable) and my fella Chris's birthday. It's what you get for quitting near his birthday I guess lol. I should say, it isn't all bad. Even when life is doing it's thang, I don't want to smoke. I do feel that I should celebrate though, it's been something I've done all the way through and it feels wrong to not do it now. I wonder what others did? Anyone? I have been thinking. To experience true joy (nb, chronic overthinker starts here), you need to have experienced the depths of despair...I likened it to smoker and non smoker earlier without even meaning to. Only an ex smoker, could fully comprehend the quit process. I really really did not want to smoke anymore, in honesty with almost every cigarette towards the end I was wondering why I was doing...while also believing it was impossible to quit, that some of us were more detined to be addicted. So almost a year...what to do. And much love to my crew, you are my rocks at times without even knowing it. Here I am safe to be me, have a giggle and generally be ok...and stay quit :) 13 sleeps.

Nooo, not that, pipe down now :) Do men actually forget the few jobs we tell them need doing, or do they pretend for laughs? Honestly, so few jobs... Do they go out for a drink with their mates and "lose track of time" or do they know the time and weigh up the repurcussions... Do they genuinely feel their "hobby" is worth thousands of dollars/pounds? To entertain them, it's weird. If they have kids do they honestly not hear them overnight? On a scale of 1 to pointless, why are they so amused by farting!? Sure there's more!

Ah, i forgot this thread :)

Twinings... do you raise your pinky finger as you sip your tea??

Haha, you need honest answers, I am brutally honest :) Never fart...anything else is all lies :) The coupons is an overload...we genuinely do think at the point we waste our life snipping that we will use them Fix things...yeah, I can work all of it...shhhh... maybe not the drill actually, but I know if I really NEEDED to know I could learn and probably do it great. But then what are the oafs hanging around the gaff gonna do. We totally prove points with this too...I had a broken drawer under the bed, lasted 14 months, 14 friggin months...I know how to fix it but I kept just having a dig instead and it cheered me up :)

Wow, that's insane! Poor you guys. x

Yikes!! TMI dude!

nope

I got it while pregnant and it stayed. The steroid injections really help, it takes down the swelling and can stop it from re-occuring in some instances. I was put forward for the operation but my reiki seems to keep it under control now. That said the recovery from the op is listed as a week, so a small op, my Uncle had it and said it was fine. Symptoms are it feels tight in my wrist and causes pain in my fingers, like a shooting pain that flares from the wrist tunnel and through the palm. I have heard good things about a proper night splint relieving the pressure too. Occassionally when I'm holding something I lose feeling and therefore my grip and drop it so be aware of that if it progresses. I am

I love this for you Lelia, be present in all you do (and avoid) and do whatever you need to. Be gentle with yourself, you are giving yourself the gift of a free life and it's not to be sniffed at. You will feel amazing in what seems like no time, honestly! Smoked for almost 30 years and feel fabulous less than a year on. It honestly is ok...just get past the bit you feel now. Get some coping techniques. Write down why you quit and carry it with you, read it if you find times hard. Drink fruit juice, sips of, it keeps the craving down as a lot is weird blood sugar levels. Say NOPE, just for today or another mantra...and actually, sign on the nope thread and commit to not smoke today. Don't think too big. This moment, this hour, this day, we are not going to smoke. Be excited!! It not allbad, some is great and amazing!! You got this...when it's time it's time!! x