Chrysalis

I think it's great that you found a fun new way to spend your money. Good for you! And just think, you can't put the cosmetics in your mouth and set fire to them! :D

I'm starting a low-carb diet-- not as strict as some of you, but I'm going to cut down on my carbs significantly both to lose weight and to bring down my glucose numbers (the weight I gained since quitting smoking has GOT to go!). Anyway, I think that it would be fun to snack on pickled eggs instead of chips or crackers. Does anybody know how to pickle eggs? Failing that, does anyone know a good brand of pickled eggs to buy? I don't think that I have ever seen them in a store.

Oh, Nancy! I'm so sorry that your sister has this frightening diagnosis! I hope and pray that they caught it early and that she will be completely cured of this disease. More and more people are being cured every day, so there is good reason to be optimistic. I will also pray for you and your parents. These are tough times but thankfully, you all have each other. Hugs to you. (((Nancy!!)))

Wow! Tracey's arrival is almost as eagerly awaited and tracked as Santa and his reindeer! How cool is that??!! Happy reunion you two!

Here's the best "Welcome Home" video ever, just for Tracey and REZ!! Welcome back!! https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=NB3NPNM4xgo

raucous

W-w-e-e-l-l-l, let's not call it "finding something to eat". Let's say we head to the kitchen filled with creative inspiration (i.e., inspired to eat). :)

Baby, it's cold outside! If you were an astronaut, what would you see out in space?

A String of Pearls If you owned a horse, what would you name it?

Congratulations, Evelyn, and Merry Christmas! The good thing about cold turkey is that it's going to get easier every day from now on. With NRT, you keep feeling the withdrawal from nicotine every day. This way you don't. So good for you! Sounds like you're really on the right track now.

Good for you, Jess! I know it was difficult yesterday, but you emerged victorious! Now stop messing around and get rid of that cigarette. The ONLY one encouraging you to hold onto it is Nicodemon. You know, I am surprised that you were able to bum a cigarette from somebody. I expect that you have already told all of your family and close friends that you have quit smoking and they should not offer you any cigarettes or give you one even if you ask. If you did tell them that and they still gave you a cigarette, whoever gave you a cigarette is a scary mean jealous person who would rather see you dead than be successful. You can see that, can't you? Stay away from that person. And if you didn't tell them that you quit, please do so immediately. I understand that in the first week or two you might not tell everyone because you were afraid of failure and embarrassment. But you are far enough into your quit that it is real. As you said yourself, you don't want to smoke and you won't go buy your own, so the biggest threat to your quit is a get-together with family or close friends. Now that you have learned your lesson, protect your quit-- tell them you quit and not to give you any cigarettes. If you REALLY choose to smoke, you will have to go buy your own. Meanwhile, good for you for posting an SOS and for reading the responses even if you couldn't reply last night. You did good! :) You are now a little smarter and a little stronger than you were before. Just keep going one day at a time. These temptations will become fewer and farther between week by week. Merry Christmas, Jess!

Love the card, Fay! Thank you for taking the trouble. I hope that you and your family have a lovely Christmas holiday!

As you probably know, the problem with nicotine replacement is that you still experience nicotine withdrawal symptoms. All day every day. And it never ends. As long as you use the patch or the gum, you will experience nicotine cravings. All day every day. Getting rid of nicotine entirely is the only way to stop the withdrawal. So, while it may sound scary, cold turkey is really easier on your mind and your body than is NRT. You're doing great! You head is in a really good place. Make quitting smoking your #1 priority for the next month and you will be OK!

A Christmas present for Lace and Doreensfree. :)

seagulls

OK, Jess. It's officially Christmas Day in my time zone. That means you have less than one hour until Christmas where you are. What gift are you going to give yourself this Christmas? The gift of clean lungs and enough energy to keep up with your grandchildren? Or the gift of renewed addiction to a stinky, expensive, toxic chemical. Yeah. Merry Christmas, Marlboro Man. Yuck!!! So, just like Ebeneezer Scrooge in A Christmas Carol, if you continue as you did in the past, you are NOT going to like what your future holds. But happily, you still have time to change it! When Christmas Day dawns, it will be a day when you do NOT smoke and it will be the first day of a happier future for you. Like Scrooge, throw open your shutters and tell the urchin in the lane to bring the biggest goose in the shop to the Cratchett family. Life is wonderful!

Devil Doll found your "pre-respond to your own SOS" post. You should read it-- it's really good. Here is my favorite line, "You have your children and two beautiful grand dtrs who love and need you. Remember saying you dont ever want those babies to know you as a smoker! Keep that thought going." Remember that? If you're really struggling with keeping your quit, go back on Chantix for a while. I have done that. I find that taking a Chantix really seems to help on those "crazy days". I don't know if the drug really makes the difference or if it's just a placebo effect. But when I feel I'm on the verge of going to buy cigarettes I take a Chantix and wait 20 minutes for it to work. So far, I have not actually smoked. Even if you did smoke that cigarette you were holding (and I hope that you didn't) do not smoke a SECOND cigarette!! Read your own pre-response. Come here and talk to us. Take a Chantix. Do everything you can to Keep Your Quit!! Don't throw it all away!

Jess? Are you still there? What is happening with you, honey?

Poor Bakon! When people say that the holidays are the most stressful time of the year, this is what they mean. If it wasn't Christmas, Bakon could just be hanging around in his Dr. Dentons as usual and would not have to be stomping on an ill-fitting jacket! You're absolutely right, Mr. B, "Bah, humbug!!" :)

Way to go, Jen! That is a major milestone! Good for you! You see, that's the way the healing happens. At first you have a lot of bad days with only the occasional good day. Then you have fewer bad days and more good days. Then you have a lot of good days with the occasional bad day. You're right on track for complete success! The next time you feel like the cravings are constant and will never end, remember this victory--not every day is bad. As we promised, things ARE getting better! Keep up the good work, Jen!

Marti- Obviously, this will be a very difficult transition for you mentally, financially and perhaps legally. But please don't use the excuse of "oh, she's not really so bad" or "the kids don't know what's happening" in order to avoid making the tough choices. That is exactly what my mother told herself about staying with a drunken abusive husband-- he's not so bad, it's not every day, and most of the fights are at night so the kids don't know how bad it is. Yes, it was that bad and, yes, we kids did know. To this day, the one thing my 90-year-old mother regrets in her life was not leaving my father when the children were young. She now knows how we were all damaged. Your OP was not an exaggeration-- it was honest and heartfelt. Every single person here concluded that her behavior is toxic and that you need to get your family away from her. No matter how scary, guilt-ridden or legally tricky it is, don't chicken out.

In the summertime when the weather is fine... What would you buy if you won the lottery?

:D :D

Rowly, listen to Colleen. She knows whereof she speaks! Even if you think most of us are not worth your time and attention, if you want to quit smoking, STAY CLOSE TO THE BOARD. The experience of many, many people has shown that those who participate here regularly are the most likely to stay quit forever. Colleen is reaching out to help you succeed; meet her half way, OK?

Marti, I have to agree with the others. Your mother's disrespect and hostility toward you is harmful to you, to Chris and especially to your daughters. I grew up in a hostile, argumentative household like you are describing and I never recovered my ability to trust people. Don't do that to your kids. If your mother is that unpleasant, you shouldn't try to force your siblings to take her, either. She is toxic-- get rid of her. Your mother is not going to change. Stop trying. Put your children and yourself first and get your mother out. I don't know how you do that in England. Here in the States we could go to the county department of aging services and say that Mom needs a placement. I guess in England you call that a local council. Talk to them about living options and about the legalities of getting her out (since she brought up the legal aspects, you need to protect yourself with correct information). Tell her she has until January 31 to find other living accommodations. If you want, you can go through the newspaper and find a place for her-- often widows will rent out one room in a house which is inexpensive. She can take what you found for her or find her own accommodations. If the council says that they have a 6-month waiting list, your mother will have to find alternative accommodations for those 6 months; she is not going to stay with you for 6 months awaiting a council placement. Don't fight with her about it, don't try to please her, don't find her more than one option-- if she doesn't like what you found for her, she can find her own place. Just tell her what her time limit is and don't get sucked into any more drama. Don't tell her this part, but come February 1, put her possessions outside and change the locks. If you have siblings and they are supportive of you (i.e., they don't want to take mother in, either) perhaps you and your siblings can all meet with mother and explain to her what is going to happen. Solidarity and all that. But, really, it is NOT healthy for anyone in your family to live this way. Please don't do this to your children! Develop the guts to direct your mother to social services, find one alternative placement for her, and then change the locks on February 1. That is my advice.