Hi, friends. I’ve been procrastinating on posting this news, but there’s no dodging it. I’ve been diagnosed with breast cancer.

 

It’s very early. It’s treatable. It’s beatable. I had surgery a few weeks ago, and I’m healing well. Ice packs are a little bit of magic, LOL.

 

But now the long grind starts. I will need radiation and years of hormone therapy. I find out next week whether I also have to do chemo and immunotherapy, too. Both are likely. Not because the cancer has spread, but because the type of cancer I have tends to replicate aggressively if it recurs. So doctors usually want to use chemotherapy and antibodies to kill off any genetic fragments that may be floating around in my system. Unfortunately, doing that kills plenty of healthy cells which are happily minding their own business. It seems so backwards that in order to avoid getting sick I am going to get really sick. WTF?

 

I’m not scared. This is not my moment to die. Mostly I’m annoyed – I don’t have time for this crap. I want to smack it down and move on. I also feel quite discouraged that the treatment may make me feel pretty awful.

 

Why is this happening? Because I smoked? Because I’m overweight? Or did I just draw a randomly shitty number in the life lotto? Who knows.

 

I need to focus on the positives. I’m grateful for early detection. (My tumor was less than a centimeter, negative lymph nodes.) I’m thankful for good health insurance. I'm lucky that my job won’t be in jeopardy over this. And I’m beyond blessed to have a caring family – a loving partner, a marvelous ex, and a sister nearby.

 

A petulant part of me is like, “Well why the f--- did I quit smoking if I was just going to get cancer anyway? Screw it, I’m gonna go buy a pack.” Which of course I won’t do. NOPE Because smoking never made anything better. And the last thing I want to deal with is a chemo nicotine cocktail – yuck. Mostly the urge to smoke is about wanting to bury my feelings.

 

Ah well. Gotta face forward. And part of that is letting my Quit Train friends know what’s up. I haven’t been telling a lot of people, but one of the things I try to do in this forum is to show up with honesty. I cherish your truths, the struggles and wins, the light and the dark. And that means sharing my own. This community has always had my back – through the early agonies of quitting, through multiple family deaths, etc. I know you’ll be by my side through this, too.

 

Onward.

Aww man @DenaliBlues, im sorry you're having to deal with that. Thank goodness they seem to have caught it early. Breast cancer isn't a smoking related cancer so that's one less thing for you to worry about. Most people I know that have had breast cancer had other members of their family tree with it. And all are still alive and doing great just like you once all this crappy treatment is over with.

I'll keep you in my prayers for a speedy recovery xoxo....

 

 

Gday 

Didn’t want to answer this till I’d had a think about it. I was diagnosed with  level 5 stage 3 prostate cancer about 4 months after giving up the burners. A crazy time. A roller coaster ride of emotions that changed dayly. One day up next down. Denial. Next couldn’t stop goggling things next hated being a mere statistic. Finally had surgery. 
What I didn’t expect was people’s reactions. Had some crazy ones. People just didn’t know how to react, what to say. 
I didn’t know how to react so really I just excepted and got on with things. 
If you reading this and your friends got cancer just let them know you just there for them and except the roller coaster ride they are going though. Just that simple. Don’t be afraid of saying anything wrong. Saying nothing is the worse.
So DB in a way I know something about what your going though, but all our life’s journeys are a it different.

So before this becomes a pity party for Chris….. my last blood test has me undetectable so I’m hoping to stay that way…. 
 

 

Good morning  @Cbdave.... I can only imagine how scarry your experience was as  you went through your treatment. I had angioplasty and a stent installed when I was 48. I was afraid I was going to die.... and got really depressed, feelng that I was too young to be experiencing what I was experiencng. I am ok now but I remember how much that was a life changing experience.

 

So happy to  hear that your last blood test was undetectable.

 

Hugs,

 

Gene

 

 

Edited November 22, 20241 yr by Genecanuck

Hi @DenaliBlues.... I am so sorry that you have to go through what you are going through. Sending you a big fat virtual hug, my healing energy and holding you in my thoughts and prayers.

 

Warm regards,

 

Gene

Edited November 22, 20241 yr by Genecanuck

Thanks for your good wishes, Jill, Chris and Gene. It was confirmed this week that I'll need chemo as well as antibody therapy + radiation + hormone blockers.  I'm bracing myself for a long grind. ~6 years of treatments, with side effects that will likely persist permanently. Ah well, better than the alternative, I suppose. Gotta channel my inner Gloria Gaynor... I will survive. 

I'm new here, but you certainly have my prayers. The several years of treatments sounds unpleasant, but certainly better than the alternative. May your treatment go well and as quickly as can be expected.

Ah, I too am sorry to hear of your diagnosis @DenaliBlues but glad to hear it was caught early. The treatment plan they've given you does sound gruling, in that it's to last so long but as you noted, beats the alternative.

 

Of course you are correct in mentioning we here on the train will always offer our support along the way, which is all we can do. I have faith you'll face this like a trooper and pull through with determination, courage & grace just like you did when quitting the smokes. My best wished & prayers go out to you 🙏 

Ohh I am so sorry to hear this Denali!  I just saw your post this morning!! I'm glad it was caught early and I will be praying and thinking positive thoughts for you!  🙏It is very treatable in the early stages. Did you have a lumpectomy?  All the best to you my friend and please keep us posted!!! ♥️

Thanks for the encouragement, everyone - it helps! And yes, QG, I had a lumpectomy. That surgery went fine and I’m healing well. So I’m thankful for that. 

24 minutes ago, DenaliBlues said:

Thanks for the encouragement, everyone - it helps! And yes, QG, I had a lumpectomy. That surgery went fine and I’m healing well. So I’m thankful for that. 

 

My mom had a lumpectomy too back in 2017 and all went well.  She was on a 5 year hormone pill but didn't have the chemo.  We are all pulling for you!!! Anytime you want to talk, just PM me and we can chat.  I am keeping my fingers crossed!!! 🤞♥️

My Dear friend D 

I don’t know how I’ve come to miss this thread 

I’m truly sorry you’re having to deal with awful illness . 
The success rate is very good , one of my good friends has just got her all clear . 
Sending my love and will keep you in my heart 

We are here to support you in your new journey 

Hugs ❤️

On 12/1/2024 at 12:15 AM, DenaliBlues said:

Thanks for your good wishes, Jill, Chris and Gene. It was confirmed this week that I'll need chemo as well as antibody therapy + radiation + hormone blockers.  I'm bracing myself for a long grind. ~6 years of treatments, with side effects that will likely persist permanently. Ah well, better than the alternative, I suppose. Gotta channel my inner Gloria Gaynor... I will survive. 

Aww Denali, I'm sorry you were delivered this life changing blow.  You have a good outlook though.   Hoping you will be blessed with lots of support and laughter and adventures and listening ears and warm hugs along your way.

Thanks, everyone, for your support.

 

Update: I'm six weeks into my combined chemo and antibody infusions now. It's been quite the ride. On one hand I'm doing great. I'm still working, which thank heavens I can do from home. I'm able to visit and play board games with my niece and nephew. I'm shouting at the TV when watching football. (Was on your side @Mac#23.) I'm trying to walk every day. I'm able to enjoy a little curry that my ex brought over from a post-funeral church luncheon. Normalcy, use it or lose it. 

 

And yet, nothing is remotely "normal" about this. Side effects are steadily growing, like an ominous movie soundtrack. I have headaches, body aches. I am losing strength in my hands. My hair is falling out. The nosebleeds are spectacular. And the brain fog, OMG. I keep focusing on the end-goal, that this is all to prevent recurrence. 90% of women with my kind of cancer who go through my protocol are cancer-free 5 years later. Untreated, that rate drops to 46%. So I AM gonna get through this, one way or another.

 

It's a bit like quitting smoking, I guess. A leap of faith plus a lotta grit. Deeply discombobulating, but with its own momentum that carries you along after a while. I've wanted to smoke many times in recent weeks, but the desire doesn't stay. It's more of a strong recollection than an actual craving. I just let it pass. 

 

My new motto: Things Could Be worse! I could be stage 4 rather than stage 1. I could be having much more intense side effects. I am not alone. The funeral my ex went to wasn't mine, LOL. 

 

Thanks for your notes and prayers along the way. I'll take all the positive energy I can get.

 

Thank you for the update @DenaliBlues, I sure wish I could just give you a big hug and tell you you're doing great. I'm so sorry for all the side effects you're having and hope your body adjusts to make them less painful. 

Please know you're in my thoughts and prayers. And yes, things could be much worse! (hugs)

Aww @DenaliBlues…

Im so sorry your having to deal with all of this 

Your in my thoughts and heart ❤️ 

Hi @DenaliBlues, I was just thinking about you and wondering how your doing. Hopefully your treatments aren't too hard on you, xoxo...

Hi hope all is going well for you. 

Hi, friends. Thanks for checking in. I’ve been thru a grim stretch lately. I got clobbered by my last couple rounds of chemo, and work has been a total s—t storm. So time and energy have been in scant supply. 

 

But now chemo is done! Yay! I still have antibody infusions (for a full year), and need to go thru radiation, endocrine therapy, etc. But it’s great to have the chemo nastiness in the rear view mirror. 

 

Turns out I am NOT one of those people who look good bald. Nope, I look like Gollum and Mrs Potato Head had an alien baby. Oh well. I don’t look half bad in a knit watch-cap, or a fedora for the really important meetings, LOL. I have maybe 3% of my hair left and it sticks straight up, like a cartoon character struck by lightning. My partner calls it “dandelion fluff” and blows on my head sometimes to make a wish. It’s sad, but also okay. Similar to quitting smoking. We grieve the “loss” of smoking, but we adapt to a new situation and face forward. And we heal. 

 

I am still weak, but getting better with each passing day. I’m feeling very grateful for all the support that I have. And… Things Could Be Worse! My cancer is curable, unlike other people I’ve met. I could have lost my tase buds from chemo, but didn’t. (In fact, I made a great cheesecake last night!) And there is no zombie apocalypse happening… at least not today…

 

Anyway, that’s my news. Thanks for your support and good wishes. They really cheer me up! 

Glad to hear your chemo treatments are over. I can't even imagine how dibilitating those must have been 😢

I wish you steady progression back to full health!

So happy to hear your Chemo is behind you 

You have another journey to travel on 

Sweetheart .

Sending Love and Hugs ❤️

All the best to you Denali! I'm glad the chemo is finally over and all goes well for you!! ❤️

Hi, folks. I wanted to offer an update on this long, winding road called cancer.

 

After surgery, chemo, antibody infusions and radiation, my bloodwork officially shows “no evidence of disease.” In other words, the cancer is gone. Phew! I’m lucky to have had the quality of care and support that led to a good outcome. 

 

Full truth, though: the treatments that saved me also come at a cost. Radiation treatments caused damage to muscles, tendons and ligaments that are requiring intense rehab and might never fully heal. Radiation also caused some lung scarring that will require careful monitoring. I’ll need to be on oral meds for 10 more years, and those pills cause joint pain and many other obnoxious side effects. Having gone thru chemo will also increase my chances of problems with my heart and bones down the line.

 

Still, I’m stronger than I was. Spring is coming. And I’m here to enjoy it. So I’m thankful.

 

For anyone reading this, please avail yourself of all preventative cancer screenings that you can. Early detection has saved a lot of lives, including mine. And stay committed to your quit. It will help your body be more resilient,  no matter what the future has in store. 

 

 

Edited March 2Mar 2 by DenaliBlues

Gday

Glad to hear you got that official “No Evidence of Disease”.

NED doesn’t sound as good as CURE but to any doctor that’s a four letter word starting with C. They will never say that!

You sound like you’ve excepted that ….good for you.

Anyway it allows you to stay in the game…. You’ll get to pass Go again and again till someone else buys MayFair! bugger.