July 15, 201412 yr Last evening is was overwhelmed with flashbacks and smoked... quit this morning and I realise it's thin ice with my mental health issues but I'm not giving up.
July 15, 201412 yr That's right everlyn.....never give up trying....... I carnt count all my failed attempts .....you can do it........I know you can.......
July 15, 201412 yr Evelyn... life is going to suck sometimes... that is just the way it is. Expect it, know it is coming and make a plan for how you are going to push through it without smoking. Just don't smoke...that is all.
July 15, 201412 yr You sing the same song a lot. If you have ability to KNOW why you smoke then you can change it. Don't know your mental abilities but I believe they are greater than you think they are. Meaning I think your more advanced or stable than you think you are. If you know your weakness then half the problem is solved. Torture is the only thing your doing to yourself. On off nicotine cycle is harder than quiting. You keep repeating the worse part. Decide how to fix it and act. Your a big girl and have to take responsibility.
July 15, 201412 yr keep riding the train you can do this just don't give up kick nicotine to the curb I know you can do it belive in yourself
July 15, 201412 yr You've got to grab hold of that quit, and hang on to it for dear life!! Make it your number 1 priority! Never give up giving up!!
July 15, 201412 yr Evelyn. Night time now. I hope to see you post tomorrow. I, and others, are thinking of you, willing you to succeed. Keep on quitting!
July 15, 201412 yr Evelyn...Glad you are back. This time how about finding solutions to your triggers before they hit you? Find an alternative activity to replace smoking in that time of stress/worry/pain. If you want this quit Evelyn, you have to do something different than all the other quits. I'm cheering for you!
July 20, 201412 yr Author Bakon you don't know me at all. 'What you can't see, isn't there, right?' Infact I deal with a mountain of mental health problems so do not judge me, it is no excuse but it is what I have to deal with. You might be all 'tough and unbreakable' but I ain't, ok?
July 20, 201412 yr if you can make three days, you can make forever. period. mental smental... everyone got problems, smoking never solved one of them. your fine. lick the wall if you need to, eat ice, walk run scream..all can relieve stress, smoking don't, it adds. three days is great and you are tough.
July 20, 201412 yr Author It will be 4, going to fight for it. The reason I relapse is the emotional pain, I escape in smoking; I KNOW what the problem is. I do not want to smoke all day or more days, I always need that 3 or 4 to help me not cry - being truly honest now - also to you Bakon. I have severe PTSD from childhood and sometimes I get overwhelmed with, flashbacks, inner emotional pain or I even relive the past - it's THEN when I relapse. I do not enjoy smoking and maybe you're just gonna walk all over me, Bakon and others but THIS IS WHY! I hate myself for relapsing but am afraid to succeed too, hearing my father say I can't do anything right! Yes I am adult but this man screwed me, and my life up. He's dead and I'm in therapy for the trauma's but it's gonna be away *poof*... You say I'm stronger then I think, maybe but why am I 3 times a year hospitalized in a mental health clinic... because I'm in crisis. I'm not sorry for myself I kick myself back up but don't judge me when you have no clue how I'm surviving everyday. Life is sometimes hell for me and the last 10 years I can't remember having 1 freaking happy year. I always fight, survive. And I'trying to learn to start living instead of surviving. Your post Bakon, is not kicking me up... it's a picture of what I should have been. If I would not have been traumatized. And sadly enough someone tried to break me, I am in pieces but not broken. And don't you dare say 'I use it as an excuse' because I tried to be normal, without mentioning too much about my past and myself. But this is me, fighting everyday and I do not have a choice but to pick myself up after I smoked because I have severe asthma: people who know me say 'start smoking again' no not an option I refuse to continue smoking my whole life. But yes I have bumps in the road, trying to avoid them but I'm not freaking superwoman
July 20, 201412 yr Author if you can make three days, you can make forever. period. mental smental... everyone got problems, smoking never solved one of them. your fine. lick the wall if you need to, eat ice, walk run scream..all can relieve stress, smoking don't, it adds. three days is great and you are tough. I am tough but not superwoman
July 20, 201412 yr Well done everlyn..... We are all on your side......we all want you succeed....... Hugs
July 20, 201412 yr don't waste a four day quit again is all I am saying . those are the hard part, why repeat. if you know problem, then adjust it
July 20, 201412 yr Author you tough enough to write that, find another activity to cope besides smoking. you tell me what to do
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