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trying to quit vs. quitting


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On a different forum for people with serious diseases, including many people who are there because of cigarettes, I see quite a few threads of the form "trying to quit smoking..." I used to approach my quit that way before,

 

 I see these people posting again later, how they 'slipped;. Sometimes I post there and give a little blurb of the values of a dedicated quit smoking forum, namely us here, but I often think people are looking more for sympathy or to rant than to really quit smoking. Sadly there are lots of people with COPD, lung cancer or heart disease to name a few, who continue to smoke, believe it or not.

 

Be glad you aren't one of them.

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In my shoes it seemed like I always thought about trying to quit.  I finally came to the point that I had to quit not try to quit -- that was a turning point for me.  Thanks for your post on this subject -- really hit home.  

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Yup, you can't try.  If you want to be successful you HAVE to decide you are quit and never smoke again, no matter what.   Just like anything else, if you don't fully commit then it isn't going to happen.

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I don't think saying, 'I'm trying to quit' is necessarily a sincere desire to quit.

It can also be about defeat and an addicts way out.  As we all can attest, addicts are really, really clever.

I hear this a lot, 

'I tried my best but, smoking won.'

'I'm trying but, it is too hard, everybody says so'

'I'm saying, 'I'm trying ' so people will get off my back.

 

I wish 'trying' meant 'doing' but, it doesn't. 

Some inner switch has to be flipped.

I am grateful, I tried my absolute very, very best and did quit smoking.

 

Edited by Sazerac
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Great post @onthemark ... I hadn't really thought about it but this quit, from the moment I decided to see how far I could go I have said "I have quit smoking", not trying to, no quitting... just I have quit... I do think there is a big difference with the language you use and your psychological attitude to your quit. I also agree with Sazski above ... using "i'm trying" is junky talk... your establishing your failure right from the get go, quitting with a built in get out of jail free card.

 

@Lin-quitting bonus points and a gold star for quoting Yoda on May the 4th be with you day. :D 

Edited by notsmokinjo
Sing out to L-q, need I to do.
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I agree, the “trying to” part suggests permission to slip. Even if it’s on a subconscious level, it leaves the door open. Now when I think about it, I said so in my earliest quits that usually didn’t last longer than two days. Wonder why. Not. ?

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Nice post OTM. I called an ambulance on a client today with blood ox level 60%. He still smokes. 

 

He he is another reason for me that I quit. I mean it only gets worse for us. Really, you can play whatever game in your head but in reality you are getting worse if you are smoking. Full stop. 

 

 

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On 5/4/2018 at 4:07 AM, Giveintowin said:

Nice post OTM. I called an ambulance on a client today with blood ox level 60%. He still smokes. 

 

He he is another reason for me that I quit. I mean it only gets worse for us. Really, you can play whatever game in your head but in reality you are getting worse if you are smoking. Full stop. 

 

 

 

This is the reality, the truth. "Really, you can play whatever game in your head but in reality you are getting worse if you are smoking. Full stop." 

Thank you GITW.

 

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QuitTrain®, a quit smoking support community, was created by former smokers who have a deep desire to help people quit smoking and to help keep those quits intact.  This place should be a safe haven to escape the daily grind and focus on protecting our quits.  We don't believe that there is a "one size fits all" approach when it comes to quitting smoking.  Each of us has our own unique set of circumstances which contributes to how we go about quitting and more importantly, how we keep our quits.

 

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