Lilley

Happy Mother's Day to everyone celebrating today

Once in a while I read something and I feel it was written for me. Wonderful quote - thank you @Linda

@Opah I am so sorry for all you have been through. Personally I don't believe abusers deserve forgiveness. I hope this article helps https://medium.com/publishous/do-you-need-to-forgive-your-abuser-to-heal-faf20303be87

Reading all your stories makes me realise how lucky we are in the UK. I got a text from my doctor saying book your appointment and the next day I had my jab. I was told a few years ago a sore arm is where all your antibodies are running to the injection site working out how to save you from the invader. I had the first one, my next one will be around June and then there are plans for a booster shot for over 50's with underlying conditions in time for Autumn. Hoping everyone gets theirs soon

@JH63 we are both going through this cycle. I can't speak for you but I have come to some conclusions : I want to quit but I keep going back to smoking. This is either because I insist on thinking about forever which is the kiss of death, or I just haven't educated myself so I am reading everything here again I want the end goal but I don't want to put the work in I think my addiction is 2000 times worst than anyone else's so they don't get how hard this is to do My life is crap at the moment and the stress of quitting is just too much right now Do you see the common thread there? That's right, I'm just talking a load of bullshit. It's the sort of thing continual relapsers come out with. It's always me me me with an addict but until we want to help ourselves nobody else can help us. We hide from the forum not because we are ashamed, but because we want the freedom to throw away our quits without a big fanfare. We have been given a thousand chances to quit smoking and hopefully save our lives. That isn't what us addicts do though. We would rather wait until we are in a hospital bed begging God to let us live and making promises to him to quit straight away. The sickest part of that is if we were given our chance then it would only be a matter of time before we were lighting up again. I hope all of us relapsers cross the line to quitters because smoking really is like Russian Roulette

Wise words @Opah

Habits more like 1-2 weeks. For example I put the same eyeshadow on every single day for 30 years. When it was discontinued I was in a right state but within about 10 days I got used to the new shade. That was a habit. Addiction like smoking however I would say a lifetime

Why does this forum have to have such a "gang up on people" mentality. All I said was these quotes were from the internet and not written by Linda. Hardly a nasty vindictive post that needs people to turn on me. Lilley's don't have thorns Opah they just like to see credit given to original authors, like Jillar does when she quotes posts on her blog. I don't appreciate a comment I make being interpreted as a personal attack on someone

7. Hard boiled in curry. I never have a curry without potatoes and hard boiled eggs in it

You know these are all quotes of the internet and not written by the OP

So I have decided that tonight I will smoke my last cigarette and go to bed a non smoker. Things seem to be falling into place in my mind and tonight is definitely the night. I can't just bin what I have and get going - I'm someone who has to have a plan. What has brought me to this point is : The wonderful support in this thread. You all have invested time and effort and I need to put some time and effort into starting my quit It's shameful that I came back a year ago and I'm still flouncing around here as a smoker I can sit around like a Debbie Downer and complain about how hard this is to do, or I can grow a pair and just get on with it and love being a non smoker My left foot and ankle is getting blacker by the day. I have numbness, daily cramping and intense itching. It's clearly not serious as it's been going on for months but why wait until it's too late for health issues And the final reason is I really want this and I CAN do it

Hi @jillar and @Doreensfree and thank you for thinking of me. Will be no surprise that I haven't quit. I just don't get how I quit for a year and now I can't quit again. It should be easy considering I've done it before but I just keep putting it off. I did message Ray to say I won't be able to have a quit buddy. I thought it would help but it made me panic. What if my buddy relapsed - would I see it as an excuse to smoke What if my buddy was having a really miserable day - would it bring down the happy day I might be having What if my buddy talked constantly about smoking - would I sub-conciously start thinking of smoking even if it hadn't crossed my mind for days So for me the forum as a whole network is the way forward. I will join you all again but I have to just find the courage to stop. It's stupid not being able to do it but right now I'm still a full blown nicotine addict - we look for any reason to smoke. I need to find my reason to quit and I will

1. It's not as hard as you think. Once you begin to be honest with yourself and to look at the facts about smoking, it will become a pleasure to remove this addiction from your life. 2. Square off with your smoking habit. Look at it and size it up. Ask yourself exactly what it is doing for you; then ask yourself what it is not doing for you. You can begin with your hair and work your way down to the tips of your toes. It is a medical fact that smoking affects every organ in the human body in a harmful way. 3. Look at quitting cigarettes as giving yourself a gift-a very big gift. You are giving yourself a better quality of life and, very possibly, a longer life. You are giving yourself a healthier body. You are giving yourself more self-esteem. Wrap all this in a package and took at it for the gift it really is, then "Go for it!" 4. Set a date. Make a commitment. Give it a try. Remember, it is alright if you don't succeed at first. Just keep trying. The only way you can lose is by ceasing to try. 5. Don't look at it as if you are giving up something. This makes it seem too much like a loss. What you are really doing is tossing something out of your life that has done you harm and doesn't belong here anymore. You are throwing away pure garbage. No longer are you going to allow your lungs to be a resting place for nicotine and tars. 6. Always keep a positive attitude. After all, this is one of the most positive things you've ever done. Stay away from negative people and worrisome situations. 7. Quit for yourself. Even though your family and loved ones will benefit tremendously from your quitting, it is you that will benefit most. 8. Treat giving up smoking with the respect it rightly deserves. Become willing to go to any lengths to remove it from your life. 9. Look up the word 'nicotine' in your dictionary and write down the definition in big letters: "A poisonous alkaloid used as an insecticide.' Put it where you can see it. 10. Don't say "I'll take my chances' and continue to smoke. They are not ours to take. We didn't give ourselves life and we don't have the right to "take our chances" on giving it away. 11.Don't fool yourself by saying you have too many pressures in your life right now to give up cigarettes. If you are smoking, this in itself is a pressures very great pressure. Every day is a gamble and your life is at stake. By getting nicotine out of your life, other things will become easier to handle. You will feel better about yourself and you will have more energy. You will have accomplished something more meaningful than all the money and material objects you could ever acquire. You will have given yourself what no one else could give you. You will no longer have the pressure of being a smoker. 12. Don't use the excuse that you might gain weight to justify your continuing to smoke. Even if you do gain a little, the fact that you will be more active and will get more exercise should counteract any weight gain. Remember, overeating, not stopping smoking, causes weight gain. 13. Plan to do things that will keep your mind off smoking. Sometimes our minds can be our worst enemies. They will tell us that we need a cigarette for just about any reason that is handy at the time. 14. Quit smoking one day at a time and think only about the part of the day you are in. "I am not going to smoke before noon." "I am not going to smoke before three o'clock." Sometimes just do it one hour at a time. This is a lot easier than trying to quit forever. 15. Don't subject yourself to smoky situations. If you do come in contact with someone who is smoking, just say to yourself "He HAS to smoke. I no longer do" and walk away. 16. While you are quitting. Look at it as an investment. Once you have quit for one hour, you have invested this hour in becoming a healthier person. Now, invest one more hour Continue to add to your investment hour by hour. It will grow and become more valuable as the hours go by. You will begin to see and feel the rewards from this investment more and more. Protect and guard it just as you would a treasure. 17. Start being kind to yourself, It is the beginning of a new way of life for you and you are the most important one there. Treat yourself with respect and love and, remember, you are no longer filling your system with poison every few minutes. Breathe the clean air and breathe it deeply. Smell the different and wonderful fragrances. Begin to spend time outdoors close to nature. Many new sensations await you. 18. Don't get too angry. If we are angry, our minds tell us we need a cigarette to cope. Until your mind learns that it doesn't need a cigarette to cope, try to avoid situations that might be setting you up. Avoid certain people that may bother you. If there is a lot of tension at work, try to get a few days off. If you can't get some time off, quit smoking on a long weekend. Avoid, as best you can, things like getting stuck in traffic. Use a lot of caution. Anger can be very destructive. 19. Don't get too hungry. It is amazing how our minds will tell us that everything's wrong when all we really need to do is eat. 20. Don't get too tired. If we are tired, it is easy to become irritated and when we get irritated our minds will tell us that a cigarette will help. Our overall resistance becomes weak and it is easy to say, "Oh well, I guess I'll smoke." 21. Don't get too lonely. It is good to know some people who are going through the same thing. 22. You can remember these four things by the word "HALT." Hungry, angry, lonely, tired. If you feel you need a cigarette, check. Make sure you are not experiencing any of these. 23. Don't get too bored. It is hard to just sit and not smoke. Keep busy. Find things to do that you enjoy. Bike riding, hiking, swimming, exploring new places, trying new restaurants. This is the time to indulge yourself. 24. Have something to fidget with. We are accustomed to holding a cigarette; being without one might leave our hands at a loss. Get a small rubber ball or a yo-yo. Paper clip, rubber band. 25. Have something handy to put in your mouth. Life Savers are good, or any slowly dissolving candy. Beef jerky and lollipops help, too. Avoid fattening foods like cookies. They don't last long and they fill you up. Experiment while you are still smoking to see what will relieve the craving. If Life Savers work, then stock up. Just a note of caution: don't use this type of substitute on a long-term basis. I preferred to keep healthy snacks handy such as carrot sticks, celery, nuts, fruit. 26. Nicotine somehow doubles the rate by which the body depletes caffeine. This may make some jittery. Reducing caffeine by half usually helps. 27. Don't drink alcohol while you are quitting. Once alcohol is in your system your defenses will diminish greatly. 28. Remember that the discomfort you experience in the first 2 weeks will definitely come to an end and you will never have to go through it again. 29. Remember, every minute you were sucking on cigarettes they were sucking on you. They were sucking the very life out of you. Don't let them have anymore. 30. Remember, it is the first cigarette that gets you started. It takes only one. This is the one you don't have. You can always put off lighting that first one for a little while. Don't fool yourself and think you can start and stop at will. You can't. Many people have tried this and gone on to live the rest of their lives never to experience freedom from nicotine again. :)

This is a great post - thanks @Doreensfree

Thank you Mee. Everyone is so lovely here

Thank you @johnny5 In hindsight I wish I had just clung tightly to the quit I had. I agree and can honestly say the constant cycle of quitting/relapsing is absolute torture

Would be lovely to have some company along the way Ray

Awww thanks @Doreensfree

Hi @jillar It's always lovely to see you. I hear you but spur of the moment never works for me. I have to plan everything like a full military operation

Hi @Ray1198 I saw from your profile you are 10 days quit today so congratulations from me. We will be two weeks apart so will be nice to have you around

Well here I am again I really hope I haven't exhausted my welcome here and can book a seat on the train. I have set myself a quit date and although I have been here before, I feel like a trembling newbie

The last paragraph is exactly why I'm here @Sazerac I promise you that. I will go and read the link now

I hear what you're saying and I do get it but if I did it right now I would feel I wasnt making the choice. I know that probably sounds like the words of a full blown addict but it's not. I was diagnosed with OCD a couple of years ago and having a plan is essential for me.

I'm still smoking @Doreensfree which is why I came here today. I thought it would be easy to quit again but it's harder than it was before. I am going to read and set my quit window. I can't just stop as I need a plan in my head. My window is quit by 01 July.

@Mac#23 thank you. You are doing great and have the attitude I'm working on getting