and you get exhaustion for little pay

 

I insert the eye of a needle

And you get a rich guy on a camel looking vaguely vexed.

 

I insert a relaxing sudoku puzzle book

And you get a scandal, a blue dress and a cigar

:-o

 

I insert a martini glass

Since you don't drink, you get the glass back with strawberry mousse, fresh strawberries, whipped cream and a vanilla cookie.

 

I insert a drink combination I invented with gin, vermouth and an olive

And you get back a certificate that trade marks your drink as a Paultini.

 

I insert a purple dinosaur named Barney.....

Five gallons of vomit pours out.

 

I insert a couple dozen cigarette butts that were on the floor around the coke machine...

They pop right back out....but sealed in a airtight bag with a large skull and cross bones on it.

 

I insert a thesaurus.

And your local school district builds another sports facility.

 

I insert an Adolf Hitler poster.

you get sauerkraut

i insert  a  gold bar

I get new shoes, purses and wardrobe :)

 

I insert plastic cups

You get some Jello shots.

 

I insert a wallet.

the coke machine uses the credit cards to host a frat party

 

Insert a mop...

And you get a job mopping up after some drunken over privileged frat boys that didn't make it to the toilet in time.

 

I insert a dozen partial bottles of booze I found

You get a district-wide meeting schedule for AA.

 

I insert a garden spade

You get a classified ad looking for a gardener.

 

I insert pumpkin spice coffee.

And you get a modern era Cinderella who rides around in a BMW and has her pumpkin in a cup

 

I insert 45 patio stones

And a flock of ducks land and immediately start crapping everywhere.

 

So, insert some duck poop...

And you get a golf course contract for lawn maintenance.

 

I insert Bill Clinton.

And the Coke Machine starts... slowly floating towards the sky...

 

I insert  forty thousand chads for ballast.

You get me wondering what the heck you mean.

 

I insert 2 fighting cats.

You get 3 mice eating all the cheese without worry.

 

I insert a canoe with a hole in the floor

You get  a flooded canoe.

 

I insert diet Dr. PEPPER.

You get 3 guys singing the DR PEPPER Jingle from the late 70's

 

I insert the aurora borealis.

and you get out one cool flashlight your kids will love to play with  ...

 

I put all the spare parts i have left over from various projects....

You get R2D2

 

I insert a couple of outdated, old TV's