Teacher: "What's the difference
between COMPLETED and FINISHED?" Student: "When you marry the right woman you are COMPLETED. If you marry the wrong woman you are FINISHED and when the right woman catches you with the wrong woman
you are COMPLETELY FINISHED."

LOL!! Too funny!  Where do you find these picture jokes???🤣

Edited July 12Jul 12 by QuittingGirl

Floating around on the internet 😂

One afternoon, two young boys wandered into a pharmacy. They roamed the aisles for a bit before confidently grabbing a box of tampons and making their
way to the checkout. The pharmacist, curious and a little amused,
looked at the older boy and asked,
"How old are you, son?"
"Eight," the boy answered proudly.
The pharmacist smiled and leaned in. "Do you know what these are used for?"
he asked.
The boy shrugged and said, "Not exactly. They're not for methey're for
my little brother. He's four." Trying to hold back a chuckle, the pharmacist
said, "Oh really? And why would your brother
need these?"
The boy replied, perfectly serious, "We saw on TV that if you use these,
you can swim, play tennis, and ride a bike.
My brother can't do any of those things yet."

A man finds his seat at the Super Bowl, but notices that there’s an empty seat between himself and the next guy. “Who in their right mind would miss the Super Bowl?!” The man next to him smiles and says, “Well, actually this was my wife’s seat. She passed away recently, and we had already purchased the tickets.”
The first guy responds, “Oh, I’m sorry for your loss,” but then thinks for a second and adds, “Don’t you think it would have been nice to take one of her family members to the game?”
The man looks ahead and replies, “I would, but they are all at her funeral right now.”

A wealthy financial backer of a hospital goes on a tour with the director, and can’t help but notice a patient masturbating. She is shocked, but the director explains “This man suffers from Semenitis, a rare medical condition where his testicles fill up too quickly.” The woman says “I suppose it is ok then”.

Continuing their visit, they now walk past a room where a patient receives an oral from a nurse. Shocked again, the woman asks, “And why is THIS happening in your hospital??” The director calmly responds “Same condition. The patient just has a better healthcare plan.”

On 7/14/2026 at 5:26 PM, Stewbum said:

A wealthy financial backer of a hospital goes on a tour with the director, and can’t help but notice a patient masturbating. She is shocked, but the director explains “This man suffers from Semenitis, a rare medical condition where his testicles fill up too quickly.” The woman says “I suppose it is ok then”.

Continuing their visit, they now walk past a room where a patient receives an oral from a nurse. Shocked again, the woman asks, “And why is THIS happening in your hospital??” The director calmly responds “Same condition. The patient just has a better healthcare plan.”

Sorry if this offended anyone I just copied and pasted. Then really thought about the context. This is going to be deleted somehow?

Edited July 16Jul 16 by Stewbum

I'm pretty sure you are ok Stew! 😁

On 7/15/2026 at 11:02 AM, Stewbum said:

Stew

If you can get away with this one you can get away with everthing 

ps…. Did you show your wife?

 

On 7/16/2026 at 8:47 PM, Cbdave said:

Stew

If you can get away with this one you can get away with everthing 

ps…. Did you show your wife?

 

NOPE.. I don't think I will risk it 😵.