MLMR

Wow, pretty. Someone made that, how cool!

@c9jane29 it took me 22 hours to figure out. You meant the confused smiley... yes. I was confused about that bubble farting ass creature. It's ... fantastic, to be honest. Some politicians oughta put that on their websites! Here a little hint on parenting, the magic of locking mom's drawer!

Seriously, today was one of the best days in weeks, quit-wise. Only had a few mild thoughts about it and immediately and easily replaced them. So, what's new since I quit? * I have an infinite amount of extra time. At first I was awkward with that, because what to do and where to go.. ? But by now, in the morning I use the extra minutes to snooze longer, take more time (and with that, ease) for groceries, my kisses last longer and i spent many, many, MANY minutes online reading stuff about chopsticks. * My constant and ever present stress is gone!! Where-to-how-to-not-too-long-I-want-but-can't-I'm-broke-it's-bad-I-need-need-need-need-need-it-now. * at work, I use the extra time to prep whatever it is I have to do. Whether it's seeing a client or attending a meeting, I take four to five minutes to breath and be ok with whatever is presenting itself. * I suddenly have money! Nicely piling up, waiting to be spend on a piano. I am nearing the two-months mark. And I am proud! ?

Well done! And so good to celebrate what you 'lost'... it's burden you want to get rid of. And soon your perspective will shift towards the gains.

Nope

Not so sure what you mean by that, I think cigarettes are just a bunch of deadly chemicals wrapped up in paper, invented to enslave you. Did you also read that I am super happy I didn't give in?

Just a note to all the newbies and lurkers reading here.. Please don't be taken aback by reading about the intensity of cravings further along the line. Know that I am so happy to be where I am now: continuously learning how to do this. Not one single hair on my head whishes to be smoking again and I do believe yesterdays wave had nothing to do with real desire or wanting. It was more of an ugly firework of the brain, crying receptors as Jane explained so acurately and clear. And I couldnt be more happy about passing the fireworks (and not having to deal with the mental mess following lighting up...man, I would have been soo miserable right now). So please, don't hold yourself back in following through. And try to acquire strategies that you can relate to (note: I don't want to be a know-it-all. Still learning and talking to myself as well, obviously! But I think I am slowly getting there!). Now, I am going for a firm walk and afterwards I'll be having the best lemonpie in the world, give some fresh smelling hugs and probably have a laughing fit about this circus called 'quitting'! Bye

Definitely better, @c9jane29. Thanks for asking! I was thinking about baking cookies today. Or should I say... cockies?

Nope

I am here, no cigs. Just came home from a very long hike along the beach, walked, ran, cried and gradually felt the wave fading. Still a bit shaky. But I survived. Grateful for this place, for you people and for everything that I learned. Though it was like I couldnt get to that knowledge, I was able to somehow hold on to it. Thanks so much for your answers and offering support. Im almost shy that I had to use this part of the board again. But so glad I did.

After all that I do, reading the whole whyquit library, trying to outsmart the thing, succeeding in that so far, 7,5 weeks in, and then bammmm, this saturday morning again. Not only craving but also panick. I don't want to smoke, I really really don't, so please brain shut up and leave me alone, I want to be at peace with my decision and not be so darn occupied with it all the time! And I definitely don't want to buy, light up, regret, be mad, smoke the whole pack and silently just never return here. Don't want to abandon myself in this. I. WON'T. DO. IT!!! Need plain muscles now and just get through the hour.

Nope

@c9jane29 I know what you are doing in yóur garden, hiding the good stuff!

@Christa326 two months in the pocket, congratulations! Well done and from what you wrote, easier than you anticipated, right? ? So tell us, how does it feel and what did you do to celebrate this awesome kickstart?

How you like 'm, cooked, baked or scrambled perhaps?

*Sigh*. Work to do. Is this a crave or just fearing a crave and thereby inducing it? My alarmclock wakes me up and I know, light therapy time. BAMMM, almost húngry for a cigarette. Immediately. Though I haven't had morning craves in at least 4 weeks, apart from the strong one that I had yesterday. Doesn't make sense. So could it be that the intense crave I had yesterday, regarding that lamp, somehow linguered and showed up this morning again? Just because I am not totally there yet, in this particular situation? Actually, I think I know. This was not a crave. This probably was a thought right after waking up (or I could have been dreaming about craves/fears/lamps, whatever!), the thought may have frightened me and voila, thinking/fearing mess with me and I experience something like a craving. Hmmmmmm. The good thing is, by now I have analysed this thing to death, so it's lost all its allure. Over-thinkers anonymous: 'Then, 18 years ago, I had a moment of clarity. Ever since, I've been working the program, hoping for another one'.

Nope

Is this the place where Megadong's zipper broke, @Doreensfree ?

Nice going!

https://eatsleeptee.com/products/****-it-t-shirt-ladies?variant=18088088453

Oredered this one!!!

@Lilly so good to visualize every conquered hour this first day! Whoáp, away with it! And don't worry about counting down till eternity... it simply won't go like that. But do enjoy the feeling! It's probably necessarry for where you're at right now

Oh wauw! Whishing you beautiful holiday moments. Smoking has no say in fun, relaxation, etc. Remember! You are going to do internal work, on both concious and unconcious levels. How awesome is that! Have fun over there

Whoa ... ? Right now I couldnt be more happy about the work i've done in the early stages, in identifying triggers and understanding their impact. Started with the SAD lamp this morning, third year in a row. Made myself a nice coffee and had some papers ready, to prepare for today. So I am sitting behind this absurdly bright light and suddenly this intense crave hits me... omg!!! In a flash I see myself lighting up, immediately having that 'Ahhhhh'moment, so at first I'm all 'wtf is this, where does this come from, oh nooo'. Panick in the disco, 'Will this ever st....' And then it dawns on me. The lamp is HEAVILY connected with morning smoking rituals. Waking up, coffee, lamp, one or two cigarettes (the only ones during all seasons I allowed myself to smoke IN the house, as to ease and boost myself for REALLY doing this lamp thing, waddajamean fvcking up my reward system), and I kidd you not, the crave eases out the second I understand the connection. Knowing this intens 'wanting' is nothing more than a brainfart, a result of programming. Knowing that here and now, in this moment, I cut yet another tie with this darned addiction! Have a good day!

I want this shirt! Tiki Tees...?