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@Kris I am so sorry you are struggling!! I know the holidays are hard for you!! I think it would be good for you to volunteer for something to keep you busy and I know that with covid it makes that hard to do. You are a strong and kind hearted person and like to help people. Reach out when you need to talk, we are here for you!!

@Kris, I agree with @Gus in that volunteering at A senior center would really help you feel needed and give you the purpose you're looking for. Here in California we have a program called CASA where you can volunteer to be an advocate for children. Another service you may find rewarding if there's something like that in Texas. I hope your Dr can help you get the meds or therapy needed to feel better

Oh, Kris. I feel for you. I suffer from anxiety and the seasonal anxiety is the worst. It’s good that you have decided to see your doctor. There are so many physiological reasons why you can be off center. They can run tests as well as referring you to your therapist. I know that you’ve probably heard this so many times, but volunteering at a seniors center would do wonders for you. You enjoy helping others! By all means, see your therapist though. You are a very strong woman for reaching out. That in itself is a large step on the journey to recovery and I’m sure you know that too. Stay close to the train over the holidays! I will make a mental note to keep checking in.

Here I go again, been really strugglng with the panic attacks. I hope it is just the holiay season and that we are all subject to the Covid panic and the fact that for now we should not be out and about. I have realized tonight that is not the only problem, the fact that I have quit smoking is not the problem. The problem is me again. I am tired of fighting it, that I have lost my husband, My Mom got so sick I could not care for here and keep her safe. My son, his fiance and her son were living here for 3 1/2 years, but they have married have their own home. I had to place my mother in care and then right after that our best family friend lost a leg below the knee. I brought him home here to take care of him until he recovered.That was about 3 months until he could go home. My Mom and the friend have both passed now. I have no purpose anymore. I have no one to take care of. I am alone all the time. I am scared all the time. I am just sick of trying to hold myself together. I am going to see my GP and let her know how bad it is right now.. I think I need to go into therapy again or I am going to have a breakdown. I have tried to handle this on my own and it is just not working. K Thanks for listening