February 20, 201610 yr after my choice to smoke in January, 2 days before my birthday, I am shaken and wary.... scared and feeling like it's only a matter of time before I choose to pick up again. meh. aligning beliefs with life I choose to live seems the pertinent thing to do.... my very inner core is reluctant to hope. NOPE, nope, nope thanks for having this site and community.
February 20, 201610 yr As a previous chronic relapser, I understand. It's going to become all about your self speak! That is "junkie thinking" and it can easily throw us off course....the trick is to recognise the junkie thoughts and tell them you CHOOSE to not smoke this time and carry on with life. NOPE, NOPE, NOPE :) xx
February 20, 201610 yr You were strong enough to quit again so I think you can stay quit. The first week can be terrible with craves and urges. May I suggest you focus on now, today, where you are not smoking. Don't worry about the big picture. Sometimes I wanted to smoke and I told myself, not today. Maybe I will smoke later or next year, but right now I am not going to smoke. And a part of me would be upset and maybe throw a fit because it wants to smoke, But I would hang on and count the days as a nonsmoker.
February 20, 201610 yr Even though you made the choice to smoke, you also made the choice to jump back in and quit again. You know how to do this, you have the tools and you know that we are here for you. ;) You have got it this time. NOPE!
February 20, 201610 yr Remember these feelings are temporary. YOU are a non smoker. It's that simple.
February 20, 201610 yr The fact that you have relapsed and pretty much quit straight away should tell you, you don't want to smoke. The thoughts are thoughts we all had to ignore. 'i don't want to quit! I will do it another day', 'you won't do this so give up now', 'just one won't hurt', 'once a smoker always a smoker', ' I could get run over by a bus tomorrow' and my personal favourite 'You only live once, so what the hell!'. All junkie thoughts, thoughts to keep you hooked. You are the one in charge, you cannot smoke unless You choice too.
February 21, 201610 yr Jimmy doesn't work Sunday's. Don't worry about the bus.... As for smoking again. Only one way to quit. NOPE. Can't fail if you follow those four words. Don't worry or even think about it. That's the past. Moving forward here.
February 21, 201610 yr Author Thanks for the focus people. BE free now. Choose it repeatedly and consciously. NOPE
February 21, 201610 yr after my choice to smoke in January, 2 days before my birthday, I am shaken and wary.... scared and feeling like it's only a matter of time before I choose to pick up again. meh. aligning beliefs with life I choose to live seems the pertinent thing to do.... my very inner core is reluctant to hope. NOPE, nope, nope thanks for having this site and community. The keyword is choose. You will always have a choice to smoke but the good news is that the longer you keep nicotine out of your system, the choice to smoke oftentimes does not even enter your mind. I know that everybody is different, but with some of the things that I've been through in my personal life since I quit, lighting up DID NOT enter my mind at all. In the past, this was not the case at all. Once you educate yourself and are 100% committed to never smoke again, something clicks at some point in time and through living life and not lighting up, that option to smoke is way, way down on the list of ways to cope with things. You have to put in the time to get to this point and trust me and others here, it's worth it! Right now smoking is on your mind because you're winning the battle against your addiction to nicotine. You're dealing with this addiction in a way that will keep you smoke-free for the rest of your life. Keep grinding and never, ever give an inch to nicotine, especially by means of smoking it. PS, don't hope because when you hope when dealing with an addiction such as nicotine, you open the door to failure. Tell yourself that no matter what, you've made a commitment to never smoke again and you refuse to break a promise to yourself. No hope or luck is ever needed. Just being smarter than nicotine because let's face it, it's a stupid weed that doesn't have a brain.
February 21, 201610 yr ," don't hope because when you hope when dealing with an addiction such as nicotine, you open the door to failure". MaryLand quitter posted those profound words to you that just JUMPED OUT AT ME. These words hold true for any addiction! I myself have had many failed attempts to quit and quit for good. But this quit has a feeling deep down in my heart and soul and and I don't know how I know but I know this is IT. I'm DONE. I want you to feel what I'm feeling. I want SO BAD for everyone here to feel what I feel....I know SO many do. Take this one day at a time right now. Whatever you think happened in january that led up to that first puff, reflect on that now and make a change/changes this time. Somethings gotta change and you have to dig deep down and find it within yourself. We can support you, but ultimately it is your choice. CHOICE...I LOVE to have the choice to be smokefree today!
March 2, 201610 yr Quitting is difficult because there is nothing to do. I just stand around and...wait, but the waiting never ends because I don't ever stop being an addict. So while I was waiting I purchased a pedometer and now ensure I'm logging a minimum of 10,000 steps per day. Beats standing around waiting.
March 2, 201610 yr Quitting is difficult because there is nothing to do. I just stand around and...wait, but the waiting never ends because I don't ever stop being an addict. So while I was waiting I purchased a pedometer and now ensure I'm logging a minimum of 10,000 steps per day. Beats standing around waiting. Well done! I did the same and have kept it up!
March 3, 201610 yr Our vulnerability is sometimes attributable to the fact the decision to quit smoking is merely a conscious decision. I know for a fact the rest of me resents the hell out of my superego rendering a decision to forgo nicotine. Proof being how often I light up in my dreams. Sometimes I wonder if I ever quit. My subconscious can be a real snot. We like to think that we operate at a 100% level of consciousness throughout our day. Guess what? We don't. Sometimes we are on autopilot. Sometimes we listen to our subconscious and sometimes the subconscious may try and hop into the driver's seat. The conscious must remain in control and vigilant. This is why drinking or anything intoxicating can be dangerous for us. We are addicts and this means our minds are divided. We can never be completely condemned or totally redeemed. We will always be confronted with the choice.
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