I told him about my lying awake and thinking about his cigs the previous night and I also told him after that I dreamed I smoked. He said something very real to me," when it comes right down to it-it is my CHOICE.  Pick up that cig or don't". I choose not to. How come him saying this to me was so profound in my head?

My guess is you realized that you have to want to stop smoking more then you want to smoke and this is something you have got to do for yourself!

 

All the forums you can sign up for, all the different NRTs you can take (patches, gum, pills, whatever), all the advice from family and friends, and anything else you can think of, it all means CRAP If you do not want to stop smoking sincerely and that is what guides you to make that choice to NOT pick up that smoke!

 

Your husband who most likely loves you more then anything, who would do anything for you can not help you with this because he smokes,

 

But you can help him by showing him that it is not impossible to do!

 

Just my 2 cents worth!

Once I made the choice ..never to make smoke again...I knew....

I would never smoke again..

This was the difference to all my other failed quits...

I had one foot in...and one foot out...it HAS to be both feet.

You can be the example to your husband for sure.

 

I want to be the example to my 10 (almost 11) year old niece.  All the adults in her life are smokers who've been unable to quit.  She thinks it's literally impossible.  I will show her otherwise.  I love to hug her even more now because I know she won't smell smoke on me.  For some asinine reason she looks up to me!  Poor girl.  :)

 

Maybe his words felt profound because they're true, true.  The choice is yours alone.  Like REZ says: all the help in the world means nothing without your commitment and desire. You can use anything as an excuse to relapse..."whaa, the forum didn't care about my milestones, whaa, my attitude is effecting others, whaa, my friends & family don't 'get it', OR whaa, my Husband still keeps them around.  Any justification and/or rationalization is ONLY a trick your thoughts use so your brain can get its nicotine fix.  That's it.  Nothing more.  See all these tricks for what they are and make a solemn VOW to yourself.  Then honor your vow. 

 

Cigarettes will be available forever.  There's no avoiding them.  Any one of us can smoke at any time.  It's our choice.

 

You have 10 days right now.  Don't throw this away.  Blessings are coming. 

Hey Karen

 

Maybe he was saying what you were thinking.

 

If you or I want a cigarette - we will find one. 

 

If we choose that we will NOT smoke - the problem is gone.

 

Keep on keepin on

maybe he was saying roll over and shut up I am tired....or waiting for you to rag on him for stinking like crap from smoke....or maybe he was thinking quiting made you horney and by saying sump'in supportive you would give him some action....

My parents would probably tell me that was a victory and I should celebrate the little victories like that.

You all gave such excellent replies, thanks! I think by him saying it is my choice....the word CHOICE was like my eureka moment!!!! I suddenly thought yeah, that's it ! I can smoke if I want to or I can continue on this path of freedom from that sickening, putrid, disgusting, unhealthy, expensive killer. It's actually a no-brainer when I think like that!In this case the grass IS greener o the other side, glad I'm here with you all :bye:  

Maybe it's nothing more than you simply shifted the mindset from it being a punishment to it being a privilege to be done done with cigs.

You all gave such excellent replies, thanks! I think by him saying it is my choice....the word CHOICE was like my eureka moment!!!! I suddenly thought yeah, that's it ! I can smoke if I want to or I can continue on this path of freedom from that sickening, putrid, disgusting, unhealthy, expensive killer. It's actually a no-brainer when I think like that!In this case the grass IS greener o the other side, glad I'm here with you all :bye:

 

Youv,e got this.....when the brain washing is gone...you have won the biggest battle...

Congratulations..xx

I'm 3 and a half weeks in after 35 years puffing. I feel so positive this time and it's definitely because mentally I was ready. I know that I can smoke if I want to but I really don't want to. Simple really once you're over the initial craves.

Funny, it IS a choice; 10 years I considered it a MUST DO.... now if I want I can buy one single fag in a Turkish store in my neighborhoud... if I want... but do I??? Is it my choice??? No. 
My GF tried to make her smoking invisible... to prevent me relapsing, she smoked 3 in a whole afternoon!!! Told her it's okay if you wanna smoke it's YOUR smoking, not mine :) My choice :)
She silently asked can I smoke on the balconny, yup go ahead ;) I dont care... not anymore.
CHOICE... love it!!!

KarenLou, you got this, come to the board, post an SOS if needed...sit on your quit and don't let ANYONE incl yourself stealing it away from you. It's your crown. Quiting is the best you do for yourself, your HB and like my GF says often you've gome so far you've achieved so much... well anyone can, so excuse justifies lighting one up. 
Make your HB jealios... make him start thinking... is this what I want? Is this my choice, in his words?
Be your own example girl and be his ;)