I'm determined to take my life back from this addiction. I started smoking in my teens and smoked for ten years. Then I quit for 11 years with the help of an online support community like this one. Well, in 2014, I threw away my quit. That's exactly what happened--I threw it away. I made a conscious choice to try smoking "just one" at a social gathering, and that was all it took. Within a couple of weeks, I was back up to a pack a day.
I am a cautionary tale. No doubt about it. But I'm grateful I had those 11 years of smobriety. (Imagine the damage that would have accumulated in my body if I hadn't quit for all those years!) But now it's time to stop fighting with this addiction for good and all. I've been a serial quitter for the last few years, quitting for as long as six months to a year and then starting up again. NO MORE! No more excuses. No more lying to myself. I am an addict. But I'm determined to make this my forever quit. And so I decided to seek support from the online world again. That's how I stumbled aboard the Quit Train.
**A Note to Newbies**
Don't let my tale of a failed quit put you off from making the best decision of your life. Yes, I chose to smoke after 11 years of not smoking. That doesn't mean that my cravings never went away. Because they did. For most of that 11-year period the thought of smoking never even crossed my mind. I was, for all intents and purposes, free. But I made two critical errors:
Number one, I lost touch with my support system. After a while, I felt I didn't need the online support anymore. I was fine on my own (or so I thought.) I had forgotten an important truth, which leads me to...
Number two, I forgot that I am an addict. Just as an alcoholic in recovery can never again have "just one" drink, we nicotine addicts can never have "just one" cigarette. We don't control our addiction. As long as we continue to smoke, our addiction controls us. That's a fact. And the only way to take some control back is to NEVER AGAIN put nicotine back into our systems.
So, Newbies, while it is important to remember to never let your guard down, it is also important for you to know that those cravings will lessen over time. The amount of time it takes is different for everyone, but I promise you--as long as you refrain from putting anything in your mouth and lighting it on fire, you WILL become stronger than those cravings. You can beat the Nicodemon. The only way to prove it to yourself is to quit! You can do it!