A very rich man was on his death bed and called together his three trusted advisors, his priest, his doctor, and his attorney.

He told them that he knew he could take his wealth with him when he died. To prove it, he gave each one $500,000 in cash and told them to put it in an envelope and place it in his coffin at his funeral.

After the funeral the three of them went out for a drink and started to talk about the strange request their friend made.

The priest said that he knew that he could not take with him and the church needed a new roof. He said, “I got the roof repaired and had $100,000 left and that was the amount he put in the envelope.”

The doctor said that he also knew that his friend could not take it with him and said, “the children's hospital needed $450,000 to finish building the new wing so I only had $50,000 dollars, and left the that amount in the envelope. My friend will never know and think about all the good that the hospital will do.”

The attorney said, “I am ashamed of both of you. You violated the trust that our friend placed in us. I put in a check for the full amount.”

 

A Queensland jackeroo is overseeing his animals in remote territory 
when suddenly a brand-new BMW advances out of a dust cloud towards him.
The driver, a young man in a designer suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban
sunglasses and YSL tie, leans out the window and asks the cowboy, 'If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, will you give me a calf?'
The jackaroo looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his
peacefully grazing animals and calmly answers, 'Sure, why not?'
The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer,
connects it to his Cingular RAZR V3 cell phone, and surfs to a NASA
page on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite navigation
system to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to
another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution
photo. The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg , Germany .
Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image
has been processed and the data stored. He then accesses a MS-SQL
database through an ODBC connected Excel Spreadsheet with email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives a response. Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet printer and finally turns to the Jackeroo and says, 'You have exactly 1,586 cows and calves.'
'That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves,' says the
Jackeroo.
He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on amused as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.
Then the Jackeroo says to the young man, 'Hey, if I can tell you
exactly what your business is, will you give me back my calf?'
The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, 'Okay, why
not?'
'You work for the Australian Government', says the Jackeroo.
'Wow! That's correct,' says the yuppie, 'but how did you guess that?'
'No guessing required.' answered the jackeroo. 'You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a question I never asked. You used all kinds of expensive equipment that clearly somebody else paid for, You tried to show me how much smarter than me you are; and you don't know a thing about cows .. this is a flock of sheep. Now give me back my dog.'

3 hours ago, Doreensfree said:

 

I have that sign,  I put it above the door  in my garage that leads inside  😂 

Finally; the answer to that age old question!

Spring must be on its way there's already Buds on the trees.