I overcame SO much this morning and even wrote myself a kickass SOS Pre Response yet when I looked at the clock and realized it was almost time to go home I started craving, thinking about how theres a gas station on the way home (Gas stations everywhere, I swear to God)  "Just one more pack then we'll start over"  "Just one more pack then we'll go with the NRT we have sitting at home" All excuses, I know. Made this mistake many times. But now I'm afraid to leave work.

 

*sigh*

 

I'm sure I'm being hard on myself when I think about how ya'll are thinking how needy I am and wow, how can she be craving AGAIN so soon....but the truth is I'm probably fine right where I am, eh? Its not *supposed* to be easy on Day 4

You arent needy.

You are just wanting something you cant have now.

Its never easy letting go of something you think you liked. Loved.

 

STAY STRONG! You dont want to start over after coming this far do you??

Try taking another route home. Even if its a long route, and there are still gas stations. Youll drive right by.

I literally had to rearrange my deck and front porch so my seating position was awkward to not smoke.

It makes a difference.

thanks Cheri. Yes I loved it...at least I thought I did...till I smelled it in my hair and clothes at the end of the day.

 

I take the bus and I'm not sure how else to get home but I'm feeling much much stronger now. I went in the ladies room and brushed my teeth furiously. I also thought about how nasty it would taste and smell after this long. Ugh. I remember when I started again the last few times it smelled so bad it actually made me nauseous. I never smelled the sour smell until I had been quit a while and tried to start again. Sour, icky...ugh

 

Thank you. How are YOU today?

smelling my breath and my hair. Yay. I am gonna make it. Will go to bed early tonight....my body could probably use the extra sleep in order to heal more

thanks Cheri. Yes I loved it...at least I thought I did...till I smelled it in my hair and clothes at the end of the day.

 

I take the bus and I'm not sure how else to get home but I'm feeling much much stronger now. I went in the ladies room and brushed my teeth furiously. I also thought about how nasty it would taste and smell after this long. Ugh. I remember when I started again the last few times it smelled so bad it actually made me nauseous. I never smelled the sour smell until I had been quit a while and tried to start again. Sour, icky...ugh

 

Thank you. How are YOU today?

 

Ahh...well you cant avoid the bus route then. But its okay. You can listen to music, read, text. Sit backwards in the seat. I always liked doing that. Anything to distract.

Get yourself some hard candies. Bottled water. Tea. Use one or all of those for the ride home. I always found thinking of not smoking made it harder for me than to just not do it and distract myself with even the littlest of things when an urge came. Youre gonna feel SOOOO good soon! Remind yourself youre a non smoker. WTF are you thinking silly you. 

ps..im awesome. lol...i dont know any other way to be. 

thanks for asking!

 

ill check in tomorrow.

Stay strong!

I found a way home whete I dont go near the gas station after all. Yay. Almost home safe and sound

Good for you Michelle :)

 

Nothing bad is going to happen to you if you don't smoke - smoking will not make you feel better in any way, no matter how much you tell yourself it will. Trust us on this point!

 

Keep going!

Nice work Michelle.

 

The odd crave does come back to surprise you. Each time you ignore it, it gets weaker.

Good job Michelle. You've got this!!

 

I say....go to the gas station. Get that shit out of the way. Stare that trigger down.

 

Ps. Not sure if it's just a rumor, but I heard they actually have gas at gas stations. :)

And donuts

And pop

Rubbers

Gum!  the newly non-smoker's lifeline.  Keep it simple.....buy gum.  Give gas stations a new association - gum (and rubbers)

Thats it then. Gas Stations=gum, rubbers and tampons.