April 4, 20188 yr I don't know why she swallowed that fly, maybe she'll die If space is a vacuum who changes the bag?
April 4, 20188 yr Sandra, well that's the name of my cleaning lady anyway If you have a brush with death, who gets to keep the brush, you or death?
April 4, 20188 yr I would certainly hope that I get to keep the brush! What is a training bra trying to learn?
April 5, 20188 yr Tango, well it does take two. Why do they call it a credit card when it's made of plastic?
April 5, 20188 yr Because being called plastic hurts its feelings. Why do they call it shop lifting when they don't lift the shop?
April 5, 20188 yr Because the shop loses a few pounds, feels lighter so it's spirit has been lifted ? Why is a watch called a watch when it doesnt watch me?
April 5, 20188 yr Cos calling it a "sit there an slowly change" didn't rhyme with swotch.. Why is gold worth more than silver when silver is prettier
April 5, 20188 yr Because yellow is always mellow... Why is it when you close one door another always opens
April 5, 20188 yr Cos you don't want to stay in one place too long, people will start hanging shit on you. Why is it called a clock when none of them have ever jumped of a wall and clocked me?
April 5, 20188 yr Cos they have clocked the size of you when passing and said oh f**k that I'm no clocking her... When does the willow whisp?
April 5, 20188 yr Nobody's perfect If you adopt an elephant can you occassionally have it sit on your lap?
April 6, 20188 yr You can but jo might get a little jealous If a table has legs what keeps it from walking away?
April 6, 20188 yr It's got obvious wood so doesn't want to embarass itself What would you do if the shoe was on the other foot?
April 6, 20188 yr Buy bandaids for the blisters it would cause Should sad people be banned from merry go rounds?
April 6, 20188 yr It depends on how close you are to the city center. Or you could just ask Nick Gilder. Who came up with the word pee to describe urinating?
April 6, 20188 yr Pope Innocent XI. He was the first pope ever to urinate and thought the word piss too common. Is asking for a Pooh bear a recipe for disaster?
April 6, 20188 yr Only if you're out of toilet paper Is a zebra white with black stripes or black with white stripes?
April 6, 20188 yr Before embryonic genetic research it was believed they were white with black stripes but new wizz bang science has prooved they are black with white stripes and bellies... although all they had to do was listen to my nephew who told the whole tour bus at full volume... "Look Aunty Jo... zebras really are black with white stripes cos that ones got a full on stiffy and its real black... how come my dlcks not that long it huge as" If a kids parent is me, is a PG rating ever appropriate? Edited April 6, 20188 yr by notsmokinjo oops... put in a family nickname... and changed it back to the safer option
April 6, 20188 yr Not sure but if so my smart phone must have bombed big time.. Why is it a throw called a throw when you sit on it ?
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