Still winning

PS I actually need a car... truly...nope...ok ;)

I cried when I saw a pic... and it's not even my car lol. Her hair Bakon :D . Anyway, good job and backslaps on buying the car..I really have no idea about cars...black cars are god though? I'm rubbish, sorry. Tell her it looks like "the dark destroyer" to me...or what about thor, god of thunder! Looks like a beast...oh, what about beast? You could pretend she's talking to you lol. Let me know if you want me to attach the pic. xx

Hi tony, Stomach problems, check! Can you up your fiber intake as it's just your body re adjusting. You have an amazing quit going already, good job!! xx

I empathise, both with the sensations at your stage and the rain, I'm english...same as seattle lol. Make yourself some plans of things to do when you crave. Early doors I wrote a list. Ie dance, sing, google an interesting fact, watch a video, create something, walk, shout nope etc etc...then when a crave/trigger came and I found it hard I looked at the list and picked something. The trick is to distract your own brain while your logical side learns about the addiction and enables you to fight the thoughts. But distraction is healthy at this stage. xx

You guys are lovely to be happy with me, thank you. Oh she doesn't feel ashamed Doreen, she is still telling everyone I am impossible and a bully. I actually understand now this all revolves around smoking for her. I asked, I begged I yelled for her to just not smoke in the house...it really smells bad...and she felt bullied by that. I feel aggreived that my house stinks and my kids and I are still inhaling poisons, and there's 3 of us, but apparently she matters more. The classic obsessive smoker. She was constantly quitting and cheating, thus putting her in almost permanant withdrawals. To say she has been impossible and downright mental would be an understatement. However she's always had a few screws loose and goes bat shit...then gets over it and forgets it happened (or talks herself out of it mattering) and if you don't instantly move on too it causes a problem. After I quit I realized I wasn't preapred to live with this anymore. The abuse was almost daily, within minutes she's said whatever nastiness came and went from her brain and I refused to accept it. I still feel sad about what I've never had to lose but I think understanding it and dealing with it as an adult myself has given me the mental ammo to be excited about the thought of a brand new life. I will always feel bad for not being able to help but I don't think anyone can ever help her and you must choose a life yourself. x

When you wake and read these, you will be on a whole new day of the quit...how fabulous is that :) You are doing awesome!! Let us know how you are feeling today when you get a moment. xx

nope. x

My friend is smober (smoking) and sober (drinking) and she said the same. The 12 steps, seem to smoke. Well like her, you did one, now you face the other and you already KNOW your strength. Vent away!! I wish oneistoo, or aine or julie frequented this site, but they have moved past all and are dealing. The merry go round, I want to smoke, I don't smoke, oh yeah, I want to smoke, I don't smoke, oh yeah....is normal for a lot of us! The change we added was arguing our own brain. Sounds odd but some of us did it and we won!! Want to smoke...hell no I don't and I won't.... So.Write a list of reasons why you don't want to. Keep it with you and read it when the thought attacks you. You're gonna fire some ammo right back at those thoughts. Start writing out a list of treats for quitting. You spent money on those cancer sticks and you have earnt the right to spend it better! Treating ourself for staying quit is a vital componant.. Are you mantra driven? Create one for YOUR scenario. A quick "go to" thought when you are being driven mad by thoughts. I deserve better, I'm worth more, For fred down the road...whatever is YOUR thing. Have a bottle of water and a healthy (or not) snack. You wouldn't believe how many craves start cause you're actually hungry or thirsty but never actually dealt with those feelings without drugging it with nicotine! You are doing AMAZING!! x

I want to say you "whining" (really, but whatever lol) means you weren't smoking and that is fabulous!! You know why, the rest of this will go into quit history, both here and in you yourself ...but the quit will never get old if you cherish it. You are showing yourself (cause it transpires that truly, you matter) that you can handle WHATEVER life throws your way. YOU are growing and evolving with each day, more powerful, more together, and quit. Good effort beauty!! xx

For some reason it mattered to me, it really did. They can call me whatever they want ... you only ever answer to yourself don't you. xx

This has just really made me smile Rowly, epic good job my lovely!! Half a year. But more than that, an understanding of what this addiction is and does now, your last hurdle sweetheart is being well and truly jumped. I salute you and your journey!! Will start carving out a gym space with friends near the treadmill for you on the lido deck!! Blinking awesome!! xx

FCUKING WINNING!!! How about you wipe your feet on my mystical and freaky fcuking doormat as you go...BOOM! Max of 2 fcuking months and counting...hey let me pack for you miserable bitch and don't fcuking darken my life again with your misery and toxic shit. My kids will be free of your fcuking pyscho and so will I, yipppeeeeeekyaaaamotherfuuuuckerrrrrr. So I'm happy :)

For those that have followed my tales of woe, (poor bastards lol), but it looks like we FINALLY have a step forward... My Mum has been offered a place and intends to take it. They need to check the resident has left and the state of the place which takes a few days. Then carry out any works and my mum needs to view and agree. Could be 3 weeks to 2 months but we have a movement plan!! I am beyond relieved at the thought of moving my life forwards and being free from the toxic waste that is my own mother. I'm sad I feel like that, that I'm not better than that..but over all that I'm just deeply relieved. I thought I would be sad maybe, but no. I am beginning to imagine how it would be at almost 40 years old to sit at the head of my own dinner table should I wish to. At waking and not being asked for my life plans only to be belittled or gossiped about for it. I want the next illness to not be my problem, for once that jumped up little sister of mine can step up with her holier than doing naf all attitude. I am deeply happy and I can almost taste the freedom from here. I can do my business plans without being called the mystic freaky one. My OCD can abound where she isn't trashing my house and too lazy to carry a cup 20 feet (seriously). It won't smell of smoke anymore!!! I frikkin ABHOR HATE the smell of smoke. I quit and I didn't want it in my house but still she smokes... crazy, utterly crazy. But through it all I did it right, I kept my morals (no sanity but morals) and did the honourable thing I am epicly happy... I'm not sure epicly is a word... Don't care! FREEEEDOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMM is a coming :girl_cray2: :girl_dance: :dance3:

Shires are warm Tracey, delay the ticket lol. x

I think it's go into blogs. Section on the right above the yellow line that says manage blogs. And then a box that says create a blog. Defo write a blog!! Blogs are fabulous ways to track your progress :) Congrats on your quit too!! xx

Something good... Miss 9 is about to go to martial arts class, Miss 5 went to swimming lessons yesterday, I joined a gym on Sunday. All paid for by money I would have wasted smoking and killing myself quicker. Love this new chance in life. xx

Hi Starry, Good on you!! I think the minute we start saying things like "I'm adding this site" and "I mean it now" etc that we have already moved to a different place mentally. Then with education as a place like this provides you can most definately beat this. Not only beat it but feel fantastic for it too!! Welcome. x

Aww Gabby that's amazing - I love this!! I bet he is having a ball! Thing is, he will remember that trip for all of his life (thus is the pull of our nature to explore) and you wouldn't have remembered each cigarette so this is an utter win win...exactly this is what makes us hold on. You're an amazing woman and mum (mom?) :) xx Runfree, I love your idea :) Sure Gabby wouldn't mind or start another thread so it doesn't get lost on this one? Up to you. xx

Part of me was really peed off at that response too! I'm not nice like you though, I wanted to twat em over the head with a bat :) Make yourself accountable somewhere. To you, to another on this board, any of us will stand for you, or ask someone close to your own time. That helps too when you feel wobbly to have someone to chat too. x

nope

I'm not surprised at what she wrote. You are very clearly a natural caregiver :) Sometimes you really need that lift when things are tough, I'm pleased something could touch your heart. x

Aww you are doing brilliantly :) Fabulous work!! xx

Not related to the quit but I often suffer insomnia when I am under pressure. I drink peppermint tea and meditate when I lay awake and can't sleep. I also started yoga regularly (maybe 2/3 times a week for 20 mins, not loads). I do still suffer a little but I have learnt that my expectation of hours of sleep was not needed. I kinda sleep for 4, wake for 2, sleep for 2 now and it's all good. When things get bad I use cold remedies (bad I know) to get me back into a pattern. I also make sure I expend enough energy in the day, I never realized but our bodies are so reactive, if I don't move physically, I don't sleep well! Never really made that connection and I would say that part I have noticed since I quit. I make sure I move some every day now, even if it's housework. I also accepted the sleep pattern my body wanted rather than trying to force one. Also as a side line I can self reiki to calm myself down but maybe you know someone who does this who might help? I appreciate my way sounds a bit "hippy" but only because meds don't do much for me so I prefer a natural route now through force :) Sleep soon my lovely. x

I want to re assure you that the point we have failed in the past normally tries to present us with some stronger triggers. There were also bad weeks for us too as others have agreed above. My advice, if you would like it, is to try and really remember how week 1 felt for a moment and realize this is a different test. It is absolutely easy to become complacent. Don't do that! I see a mindful and aware post from you here. It's also good for others to read. It can feel pretty lonely where it's not new and shiny anymore. Kinda like hey, where my brass band as friends and family just go oh still quit, good...and move on. So this is me with my pom poms for you shouting YOU ARE DOING IT, GREAT JOB!! Still celebrate every milestone, with us and yourself. Write down every fabulous day, somewhere and it helps to go back and see it on a bad day.Maybe add a ticker to show how many cigs you haven't smoked by being quit this long. That stat always blew me away! Celebrate some and it will feel more balanced. Either way, this too shall pass! Guided me through some fabulous and cruddy times. XX

Glasses (eww to putting something in your eye!) Wine or spirit mixer (when you go out)