alley

So encouraging! Congrats to your new feeling of freedom.

Thank you everyone. They are JUST thoughts. And I am the one who decides to hold onto the thought or gently push it to the side. Even these sad thoughts....thoughts like I am loosing my best friend forever, life will never be as fun, I miss sitting, smoking, staring into space with that cup of coffee all morning......thoughts. Hey, it has been my habit for 45 years. long time. don't really remember life before the smoke. so right now I am going to think about how wonderful this spring will be for me...my first spring to really smell the flowers. and I am a huge gardener. this will be a new adventure for me cry. laugh. scream. eat. walk. scream again.

Every morning I wonder if today will be the day that my cravings start to lighten. I know people who "decided" to quit smoking and say it was easy...they were just done like that and have no desire to smoke again. Really? how can that be? I realize there is no one formula that fits all of us. I crave every day...most of the time. And the big junkie negotiator inside my head begins and we argue for which seems like forever!! just one. no big deal. and on and on and on However, today I have noticed my craves are far less often with much more time between them. That is HUGE hope for me. I am super grateful for being here. Reading is such a powerful tool for me. Thank you everyone for sharing. BTW...I changed my "handle" as some suggested. suggested? well.....anyway. lol

trying to stay busy with 'No brainer" things....cooking, cleaning, walking, eating (not good), pacing the floors. my mental concentration is low. I have photos to edit and books to read, which at this moment seems way to BIG for me to do. I am going to be kind to myself without the pressure of producing a lot in the next few days. ugh....is it time for bed yet???

no...she did not change her name. lol There are no words to describe how helpful this forum is for me. And the reaching out from so many of you, giving me extra tools and words I seem to need to hear at this very moment. I am bouncing between emotions today....anger, frustration, hope, pride, desire and sad. All in one day. whoooweee. Early to bed is on my agenda.

It sure feels wonderful to know I am not alone and that others truly do understand my crazy thoughts. Your words are so comforting. And Simba, thanks for that hourly breakdown of a quit. I am glad to have a place to come. I can do this. I can do this. I can do this.

Thank you so much for this! Just what I needed to hear at this exact moment.

I tried quiting 3 days ago. broke down and smoked 1 cig each day. ugh! of course then I feel quilty and it really only made all these emotions worse. I have smoke for over 30 years. I WANT to quit totally. I understand it is going to be tough for awhile. I am a strong woman, but these thoughts and cravings are HUGE and I find myself caving. So I decided to come in here and get support from all of you. A place to go when I feel weak. A place for inspiration. My heath has been affected by smoking all these years....high blood preasure, I had a TIA a few weeks ago....and know if I continue I will either have a heart attack or full stroke. You would think that would be enough to make me smile and be happy to quit. sad to say...it is still so very hard, emotionally. please dont judge. thanks for listening.