Zelda

Action it's very much a miracle, a terrifying miracle. A lot of fear has taken hold in my heart, fear I will not be able to hold this baby and feel the warmth of its touch. Thankfully I have a very under standing doctor. I have another appointment on Friday, should get to see a flutter of a heartbeat through ultrasound. That will help ease my fears for a bit I hope. I know quitting gets easier but as of right now I'm failing to see the end of the rainbow. I really just want to sleep, a good night's sleep would be perfect. Thank you for your support.

I read the first book, never picked up the second. The series from what I've seen is pretty great so far. Definitely stays more true to the book. Maybe I should start reading it again to keep my mind busy, might even help with my anxiety! Im constantly fidgeting.

Thank you everyone for the warm welcome and congratulations. I very much appreciate every single one. I'm trying my hardest to be happy but it's hard. I've been a nervous ball of energy, plagued with anxiety, I can't sleep, I can't eat a whole bunch. I'm not as grumpy though, husband is pretty hlad about that. Thank fully I never had a cough. It's these nasty cravinge I keep having and day dreams, they can knock you off your feet. Went for a nice long walk earlier with the dog, that seemed helpful. I will say, this has gotten progressively easier since days 3 through 4, I thought I might implode. I'm not online a whole bunch but I'm looking forward to reading more on your group and getting to know you guys. I see this is a very multi cultural group, that is pretty awesome!

Hello. Not truly sure how to start so I'll start with my name, Zelda Rose. It's not my real name, something I picked up when I was a kid. Anyways, I'm 36 and have been a smoker for almost twenty years. Why did I start smoking? When I was 16 I gave birth to a still born, full term baby girl. I had some other issues as well and was told to not expect children in my future. My heart was shattered and I rebelled. Not a lot, just enough to glue my heart back together and get hooked on smoking. So why is this revelent today? My spouse and i found out August 1 that we are expecting, I'm pregnant. I walked out of the bathroom, picked up all my cigarettes, lighters, and ash containers and chucked them. I haven't smoked in 18 days. It sucks. I know I will not smoke a single cigarette while this little bean is growing inside me. I know I'm not quitting for me. If I'm going to beat thiso for longer than the next 33 weeks I need support. This is where I found you. Right now all i seem to think about is smoking, and not vomitting, ugh.