Five

 

Why can't we squeeze the Charmin?

Because Mr. Whipple said so

 

Why does one want to squeeze toilet paper anyway?

Not all toilet paper......just Charmin

 

Are Alexa and Siri related?

Yes, twice removed 2nd cousins

 

What happens when you tell Alexa to call Siri?

She calls Siri

 

What's a rim job?

 

Process of putting a tire on a rim

 

Is a swirly dangerous?

I don't know but it sounds dangerous

 

What's a swirly?

You stick someone's head in a toilet and flush

 

How do you not know about swirlys?

I'm civilized

 

Why don't birds fly at night?

Because they don't have night vision

 

Why do birds sometimes fly right into a closed window?

Texting while flying

 

How does gravity know to keep us upright instead of upside down?

It doesn't

 

Why does note paper have lines?

 

 

Edited January 9, 20215 yr by Mac#23

To keep them he letters straight

 

Why is poop brown?

Because bird poop was already white

 

Why is bird poop so runny?

They pee at the same time

 

If the Secret Service is so secret how come we all know about it?

Yeah but do you know the secret handshake

 

Why are hillbillies losing all their teeth?

Its not that they lose them its that they don't bother replacing them

 

Where do stars go when its light out?

Star charging station

 

Why would anyone want to take a mud bath?

Because pigs look so happy when they do it

 

 

Why would someone trust a giant rubber band to hold them while they jump off a bridge?

 

 

Because they're stupid

 

Why would someone travel in a basket attached to a giant balloon?

For the same reason

 

Why does God hate trailer parks?

He can't get a handle on trailer trash

 

What's the difference between trailer trash and white trash?

If daylight was dark and nighttime was light would kids go to night school?

Of course because there's no such thing as light school

 

What shift is the graveyard shift again?

The shit shift

 

How did kangaroos decide to live in Australia?