Pilgrim

I failed. Yesterday started out so promising. I had a good mindset and made it through the morning just fine. Late afternoon it hit me like a ton of bricks... I don't mean to whine like some kind of helpless victim, but believe me when I say, I'm going through some really hard stuff right now. Plagued by these woes, and a sudden, very physical, irresistible craving for nicotine, caused me to cave and buy a disposable vape. I told myself I would use it at the worst times, sparingly, just to curb the strongest withdrawal symptoms. Since I got it its been very hard not to sneak in a few puffs every hour or so. In hindsight, maybe it would have helped had I reached out on this platform when the craving became unbearable.... I'll keep that in mind for next time. At the moment, however, I'm an active addict.

Nope, not today!

My friends, I just extinguished my last cigarette. Tomorrow I look forward to waking up and greeting the new day as a non-smoker.

Thank you all for your words of encouragement. I hear you! I'll keep you posted and hopefully be back very soon to announce that I've quit once again.

Hello friends, I don't really know what to say... I gave in to temptation. Life is just really ******* hard right now. I know from past experiences that adding a nicotine addiction on top of everything else is ultimately another burden to deal with, but in the moment it feels like a way to alleviate some stress. I bought a pack today and told myself I'll smoke this pack and when it's finished I'll quit again. I hope I have the strength to do so when the time comes. Four months quit and now I'll have to start over once again.

Nope!

Congratulations on 12 years quit Doreen! That's awesome.

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Thanks guys. I appreciate your support.

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Been a few days since I've posted, but still going strong. Nope!

@Doreensfree yes, still standing my ground! Thanks for asking.

Nope!

Thank you, Minnie Mouse. I think "amen" pretty much covers everything you said! I haven't considered any mantras, but that could be very helpful. I appreciate your thoughts and advice!

@c9jane29, thanks for your advice. You're absolutely right, it's the romantic memory, more than anything, that's triggering me here... that stinking thinking. Lol. I'm going to stay strong and get through and past it.

Friends, I am really struggling here. I've been "dreaming" about smoking again lately, but it's particularly bad right now. I'm in the middle of a camping trip with my kids. The last time I was here, 2 years ago, I had just started smoking again and was really enjoying the nicotine buzz, as well as the "thrill" of sneaking in a cigarette here and there. Today this place is triggering me so hard. I keep thinking to myself how nice it would be to taste a cigarette again... just allow myself one, as an exception, as a "treat." My rational mind knows if I do have a smoke it could very well lead to the next one. I would ruin my 3 month quit... it would be a damn shame. But despite that, the urge is so strong right now... I don't think anyone could say anything in response to this that I don't already know, but it helps somewhat to write about what I'm going through here. I'm hanging on.

Nope!

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