Why do people relapse after years of not smoking?

[beacon]

Why Do People Relapse after Years of Not Smoking?

By Terry Martin, About.com

 

Question: Why Do People Relapse after Years of Not Smoking?

 

I have a nagging fear that I can't seem to shake. I am stable in my quit right now, but the addict in me is telling me that 5,6,7 or 10 years from now I'm just going to pick up the habit again so what's the point of celebrating the fact that I'm a non-smoker now? Am I doomed to fail eventually? I know people who have started smoking again after YEARS of abstaining. It scares me.

 

Answer: Every so often someone comes into the Smoking Cessation Forum who lost their quit after years of not smoking. On the surface, it IS scary for those who are working hard to beat this addiction. On the surface, it looks like smoking is a nasty monster that follows us, waiting to pounce when we're least suspecting... That's not how it works though. Relapse never happens out of the blue, even though people often think it does.

 

The key to lasting freedom from this addiction lies in changing your relationship to smoking. If you quit smoking by sheer will power, believing somewhere in the back of your mind that you're sacrificing something good, chances are very high that you'll eventually relapse. You might be able to abstain for years and years, but you'll find yourself missing smoking and thinking of it as a fix when times of stress or other potential triggers come along. However, if you do the work necessary to change how you think about your smoking habit, you'll find your freedom, and you won't have to struggle to maintain it.

 

That's all fine and well you're probably saying, but HOW to make that change?

 

Be A Sponge

All smokers know that smoking is bad. We all know that it causes emphysema, lung cancer, and a thousand other diseases. In order to continue smoking in the face of this harsh reality, we all had ways of compartmentalizing our habit. Otherwise, smoking would have caused so much fear and discomfort, we wouldn't have been able to do continue doing it. We'd tell ourselves we had years before we needed to worry. We'd rationalize that smoking light cigarettes was better for our health. We'd say that smoking disease happens to other people, not us. We had a hundred ways to rationalize smoking.

 

Eventually though, the smokescreen wears so thin that the scales tip in the other direction, which is usually when people quit. Once that happens, it's time to take a good look at all of the issues surrounding smoking. Learning everything you can about the dangers as well as what to expect when you quit will go a long way toward helping you start to make that permanent change of attitude that we're talking about.

 

When I quit smoking, I was a full four months into my quit before I could look at pictures of smoking-related disease. I just was not ready before that, but when the time came that I could face it, those graphics did a lot to strengthen my resolve. Education is an important part of the process that will release you from this killer of an addiction. Be a sponge and soak up everything you can find about smoking/quitting.

 

Attitude Adjustment

Obviously, a good attitude helps us more than a bad attitude. There's more to it though than just positive thinking. Truly changing your attitude when it comes to this process involves retraining how you think. For most of us, it involves conscious effort and plenty of practice.

 

Begin by paying close attention to the literally thousands of thoughts floating through your mind on a daily basis. Capture negative thoughts as they arise and change or "retrain" them on the spot. You may not believe what you're telling yourself at first, but do it anyway. One of the lovely things about the way our minds work is that we tend to believe what we tell ourselves. Take advantage of that and feed yourself a steady diet of good, solid information about the realities of smoking. For instance, if you're thinking:

 

I may as well give up. I've been smoke free for months now and I still miss smoking every now and then. I'll never be free.

 

Tell yourself:

 

I need to be patient with myself. I smoked for a lot of years and it takes time to reprogram the hundreds associations to smoking I've built up. I know that cravings are signs of healing.

 

If you think:

 

Smoking made life more pleasant. It relaxed me and helped me cope.

 

Tell yourself:

 

Smoking was slowly killing me. Addiction to nicotine actually created most of the anxiety I felt. Smoking only relieved the physical withdrawal I experienced when the nicotine level in my bloodstream dropped. I can cope so much better without smoking than I ever did with it.

 

Changing the way we think isn't a miracle that just happens to us. We do the work to make the changes by paying attention to errant thoughts and making appropriate adjustments. If you notice your attitude is making a shift for the worse, this is the way to pull it back into line.

 

Be patient with yourself and allow for the time it takes to heal from this addiction. As you make your way through the first year, you will have experienced most of the situations in regular everyday life that trigger thoughts of smoking. Once faced, these triggers lose power. This all takes time and practice.

 

You are in the driver's seat with your quit. Our actions are always within our control. Do the work to change your relationship to smoking and you will find the permanent freedom you want so badly. It's doable AND you have the ability to make it happen for yourself.

 

Believe it!

 

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http://quitsmoking.a....com/od/recover... covery.htm

 

How Do I Recover from a Smoking Relapse?

 

Question: I dont know what happened... I quit smoking 4 months ago and have done very well. Lately though, I've been missing smoking a little. All of a sudden and without warning, I found myself unable to control the urge to smoke. The next thing I knew, I was asking my friend for a cigarette and had lit it almost before I realized it! I've been smoking a few every day since then, and I feel miserable. How did this happen when I was doing so well, and what can I do to recover?

 

Answer: Its not uncommon for people to describe a smoking relapse as something that happened out of the blue. While lighting the first cigarette that breaks your quit rarely happens by chance, it can feel that way.

 

 

 

Recognize Junkie Thinking

 

The seeds of your slip were likely planted days or even weeks before the actual event occurred. The shift in thinking may have started by seeing something as simple as a stranger relaxing with a cigarette. You may have thought, "He gets to smoke, but I can't because I quit." Feelings of being deprived of something good - of sacrifice is enough to set the stage for a slip. That feeling, if left unchecked can fester and grow over time until you're obsessing about smoking. It's all in our perception! If you tell yourself that smoking has value and you're making a big sacrifice by quitting, you'll probably find yourself smoking again eventually.

 

 

Romancing the Cigarette

 

Another common form of junkie thinking that can lead to relapse has to do with romanticizing your old smoking habit. Once you put some distance between yourself and that last cigarette you smoked, the edges of your quit can get a little fuzzy. Its easy to forget why you thought it was so important to quit smoking. Maybe that chronic cough is gone, or you think that quitting hasn't been so hard. You tell yourself that you could go back to smoking for a little while and then quit again no big deal.

 

Like a bad relationship you had to leave behind, it's easy to remember the "good times" and not the bad. We've all done it. We think about how nice it was to relax on the deck with a smoke after a big dinner. What we conveniently forget is all of the other smokes throughout the day that weren't so enjoyable - the ones that left us headachy, tired and out of breath.

 

While you may have the nicotine out of your system, the habit of smoking holds on a lot longer. If junkie thinking takes hold, you may be amazed at the creative justifications you can come up with to allow yourself to smoke just one cigarette. They're all lies of course, but most of us have lost at least one quit attempt to faulty thinking.

 

Pay close attention to the background noise in your mind and correct unhealthy thoughts of smoking as they come along. Dont allow them to grow into an urge to smoke that you cant control. Nip them in the bud and protect your quit.

 

 

Recovering from a Smoking Slip

 

If youve fallen off the smoke free wagon, junkie thinking has gotten its way and will continue to influence you if you let it. In order to preserve your quit program and avoid a long-term smoking relapse, you must stop smoking now and get your mind working for you instead of against you once again. You'll be busily trying to rationalize why you should put off quitting, but don't listen to the lies. The only good time to quit smoking is NOW. Get right back up on that horse and start riding again.

 

 

Use the list of suggestions below to get yourself back on track:

 

Write out a list of reasons for quitting. If youve done this before, get your list out and read it over and add to it. Carry it with you and refer to it when youre feeling unsteady. Those reasons are no less true today than they were when you first quit smoking. Bring them back into focus - they'll help you get your priorities in order.

 

Educate yourself. Read everything you can about what smoking does to your health. Face the dangers of smoking straight on. It's a great way to build resolve.

 

Get support. In person and online, seek out the help of others.

 

Apply yourself just one simple day at a time. Don't worry about the fact that you slipped it happens and is in the past. Don't worry about never smoking again either. Just think about today, and doing the best you can with it. You can stay smoke free just for today, can't you? That's all you need to do. Your quit program will be much easier to maintain if you follow this rule dont overwhelm yourself by projecting forward or back. Your point of power is in the here and now. You can't change what happened yesterday, and the best way to influence your future is by doing a good job with today. Keep things simple and in the present tense.

 

Accept yourself. Were all human and make mistakes. You slipped and smoked, but it doesn't mean you're a failure. Learn from what went wrong and make corrections to avoid the same problem in the future.

Be kind to yourself and be patient too. Relax and take your quit as it comes. Youll have good days and bad days, but over time, the good will outweigh the bad. Pamper yourself a little and dont expect too much too quickly. Slow and steady wins the race every time, and this race is one that will reward you with improved health, confidence and quality of life overall.

[jess]

Thanks beacon.I needed this today...

[Sazerac]

 I don't do too much 'future' tripping'

 

about what the future might hold.

 

If I stay quit  or  If I don't...

 

I do know that EVERYDAY,  

 

FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE, 

 

I cannot have one puff,  

 

not one smidgen of Nicotine 

 

without

 

Loosing my Freedom to my Addiction.

 

Is this an Easy Peasy Moment ?

 

You bet.

 

For me, there is simply no other choice.

 

N O P E

 

Not One Puff Ever Ever Ever.

 

Never Ever.

 

 

 

 

 

edited to add:  Thank you, Beacon,  for a splendid article.

[action]

Thanks beacon, can never have too many reminders!

[SueBeDoo]

Great one beacon, good woman xxx

[Still winning]

Thank you my friend. Sometimes you just need to read these things. x

[Doreensfree]

Great post...and I great reminder....

Taking that one puff.....would lead to indescribable events.....

I know it's got to be n.o.p.e.....