October 15, 201411 yr A guy gets caught shagging a goat in the town square - the town folk are up in arms and have him arrested the next day they bring the man to trial.. the judge asks the plaintiff what did you see that disturbed you- the woman says - "He was banging a goat in the town square" at this the court room erupts and the judge is banging his gavel - order, order there will be no more disruption in my court..after things settle down ... he proceeds to ask the woman ..well what happened next the woman proceeds to tell the jury that upon completion the goat turned around and licked the guys balls. Juror one turns to juror two and says "You know a good goat will do that"
October 15, 201411 yr Two women are chatting in an office.Woman 1: "I had sex last night, did you?"Woman 2: "Yes."Woman 1: "Was it good?"Woman 2: "No, it was a disaster... my husband came home, ate his dinner in three minutes, got on top of me, finished having sex in five minutes, rolled over and fell asleep in two minutes. How was yours?" Woman 1: "Oh it was amazing! My husband came home and took me out to a romantic dinner. After dinner we walked for an hour. When we came home he lit the candles around the house and we had an hour of foreplay. We then had an hour long session of fantastic sex and afterwards talked for an hour. It was like a fairytale!"At the same time, their husbands are talking at work.Husband 1: "You wanted sex last night, how was it?"Husband 2: "Great. I came home, dinner was on the table, I ate, had sex with my wife and fell asleep. It was great! What about you?"Husband 1: "It was horrible. I came home, there's no dinner because they cut the electricity because I hadn't paid the bill; so I had to take my wife out to dinner which was so expensive that I didn't have money left for a cab. We had to walk home which took an hour - and when we got home I remembered there was no electricity so I had to light candles all over the house! I was so angry that I couldn't get it up for an hour and then I couldn't climax for another hour. After I finally did, I was so aggravated that I couldn't fall asleep and my wife was jabbering away for another hour!"
October 15, 201411 yr Author Oh I'm gonna look deeper....I'm too mild here....you dirty bunch...l.ol....
October 16, 201411 yr Author Joe and Wendy have been dating for 4 years.but joe was always sleeping around... When they finally decided to get engaged,Wendy had a idea to keep him faithful. She made him get her name tattooed on his manhood. When he wasn't ....standing to attention....all you could see was the letter W and Y.... Joe and Wendy finally got wed and went off to Jamaica for a honeymoon.... In a restaurant one night joe is in the bathroom.standing next to him is a waiter...who also had a W and Y...on his manhood.... Oh says joe....you have a girlfriend named Wendy too.... No mon....replies the waiter...it says.... Welcome to Jamaica have a nice day....
October 16, 201411 yr A family are driving behind a garbage truck when a dildo flies out and thumps against the windscreen. Embarrassed, and to spare her young son's innocence, the mother turns around and says, "Don't worry; that was an insect."To which, her son replies, "I'm surprised it could get off the ground with a c0ck like that."
October 17, 201411 yr Still waters run deep... ( ;) ) Sounds like a Scorpio phrase, if I ever heard one...
October 17, 201411 yr Author A man goes to see a plastic surgeon and says...doctor..I've got this ..sheriuosh shpeech problem.... Doctor examines him and says... Your penis is too long sir,see,it somehow connects to your tongue ,and presses Down your throat,causing your speech problem.. Man shouts...I don't care...cut it off then.... The doc cuts it off... Two weeks later same guy goes back tomdoc,s... Doc....my speech is fine now...but my love life sucks...you have to sew it back on.... Doc says... Are you sheriosh..Itsh absholutely out of the queshtion.....
October 17, 201411 yr Author Oh yes that's me.....sitting on a leaf.....ready to spread my wings.... Sweet dreams action....xxxxx
October 18, 201411 yr Author Police cornered off Liverpool city centre this morning,when a suspicious object was found..... It turned out later to be a tax disc.......
October 19, 201411 yr Author A guy goes to the doc,s with the head of a daffodil sticking out of his butt...help me doc... The doc pulls out a full daffodil flower and stem...then pulls out another,then another,then another.... Oh my word docs says....you have a nice bunch of flowers there...guy says.... Is there a card......
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