sgt.barney

Hardening The F_ck Up in the Colorado Desert with The Pants

The Ryan Mountain summit marker with The Magic Pants Easy Peasy

Hardening The F_ck Up in The Mojave Hard to see burried under all that gear, but look just above the black kneepad and you'll see the rolled-up purple Magic Pants. Easy Peasy

The Pants (in "shorts mode" - the legs zip off and convert The Pants into The Shorts) on some random wall at some random crag in Muir Valley Easy Peasy

The Magic Pants at the base of Devil's Tower Climbing Devil's Tower At the Summit of Devil's Tower Easy Peasy

As requested (but off topic - no Magic Pants ... but maybe on topic: Harden The F_ck Up and Jump !) How do y'all like the used 1970's disco-era Jump Suit in stylish peach and navy? And just for grins, here's what that (failed) beard experiment looked like from the ground. Probably no pants on in this pic: Easy Peasy

The Pants at 600 feet, on approach for landing ... Who jumps in clam-diggers / capris? The Sarge does - that's who. Easy Peasy

The Sarge agrees. Here's one with The Lady (without The Magic Pants) And here's The Magic Pants with The Mrs. Sarge gearing up to head down the Sheltowee Trail for a few days of mud, poison ivy, and wild blueberries. Notice, MQ - The Sarge is carrying THREE PACKS to The Mrs. Sarge's ONE. The Main pack on the back. A smaller one on the front (The Sarge believes Mrs. Sarge is digging out a pack of her smokes - she always has one before we head out from a trailhead) and a tiny pack strapped onto the back of the big pack. Just call The Sarge : The Sherpa. Easy Peasy

Nominally, no. The Sarge's is about 50% more actual weight than The Mrs. She, however, is carrying more. As a percentage of body weight, her standard pack is far, far heavier than The Sarge's - and that's what counts so you are, indeed, correct. How do we know this? The pack (and The Magic Pants) at weigh-in: Easy Peasy

The Pants on Harney Peak Easy Peasy

The Magic Pants after doing the Rim-to-Rim hike of The Grand Canyon with Mrs. Sarge ... See that cigarette tucked behind Sarge's ear? Yeah that. He used to be a smoker. Used to. And then he Hardened The F_ck Up! Easy Peasy

Cooking a romantic dinner for two at Yosemite Valley's infamous Camp 4 Easy Peasy

Hiking through Tuolumne Meadows ... Easy Peasy

The Magic Pants @ Inyo Easy Peasy

You are SOOOOOOO RIGHT ! Now The Sarge just has to dye his skin green, expose himself to Gamma Radiation, and gain about 250 pounds of muscle .... Easy Peasy

The Magic Pants wth the Big Trees in Sequoia National Forest Easy Peasy

I know, right? Time for a "Harden The F_ck Up Pedicure" ™ to go with those purple pants. Easy Peasy

Found another - forgot they were condemned to a life of incarceration back in 2008 ... But The Sarge staged a jailbreak and got 'em out of The Pokey https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H389yLb87fo Easy Peasy

The Magic Pants started out a nice, outdoorsy camoflaged-ish dark, chocolate brown but over the decades both The Sun and Maytag have taken their toll on the color. They are clearly purple now and may some day soon be pink. If you look at the really worn spots, they're already starting to come out of the closet ;) *** Just remembered another location: The pants are in this pic, too (Summit of Ryan Mountain, California): Due to the lighting and angle of this pic, they look their original brown but they are, indeed, Purple Pants standing on top of the Purple Mountain's Majesty. Easy Peasy

Then again, as the Sarge looks at the photos he wonders silently to himself: Just how hard can a man be in purple pants rolled up to look and wear like Capri Pants? Too late now. Can't switch 'em out. It won't be the same. Easy Peasy

There is only one thing all successful quitters "get" that unsuccessful ones don't. It is this: ever. The "E" in NOPE. Not. One. Puff. Ever. EVER. Easy Peasy

The Sarge says again: The kitchen, not the gym is where you will reap your rewards... But to address the topic at hand: it's rather hard to burn more calories in less time than distance running. If by "best" you mean most efficient, then hands-down, it's running. Easy Peasy

Some day The Amusement Park will close. The Sarge is trying to ride all the rides before closing time. Life is short, y'know? Easy Peasy

10 down, two to go and The Sarge will present you with your well-earned Sergeant Stripes. Time for The Special Dance, Cousin Easy Peasy