My Life as One Big Smoke Trigger
By Sazerac
· 6165 views
Have A Listen to Tex Williams, 'Smoke, Smoke, Smoke' , won't you ?
If I was ever without a cigarette between my fingers,
you would find one dangling from my lips since 1969 (?).
I smoked stogies I rolled mostly,
until I was working as a Deck Hand in the Gulf of Mexico which made rolling problematic.
I smoked tailor-mades, an occasional cigar.
I smoked snipes and dog ends.
I smoked walking, talking, bathing.
I work from Home and You know I smoked Inside.
I smoked cooking, cleaning.
I smoked on my stoop and in my courtyard,
I smoked in bed, you know.
I always smoked on the phone.
I smoked thinking and planning.
I smoked deciding which way to turn.
I drank at a smoking bar.
I smoked E-Cigs too, at the end there, just to wank up my nicotine.
Loved me that nicotine, baby.
(what Joy to 'smoke' in health food stores !)
I even smoked in Mill Valley, CA, where it is
Illegal to Smoke...OUTSIDE.
And then, last October, I quit on a whim.
Just to see what I was made of
(other than rank nicotine).
It was minute by minute
then hour by hour,
day by day.
You get the picture,
and my resolve HELD.
Now, at Ten months and change,
craves are strange little thought bubbles that don't belong to me,
EXCEPT
when I try to paint.
That is what I 'do' and it is being a real bugger.
What if I can't paint without that junk ?
It feels so weird to hold a brush without a smoke.
Plenty of Fear (oh, JOY) to shut down
on this last (or current) no-smoking snafu.
I will buck up, quit my special snowflake whining and just get on with it FGS.
This week, I will.
Yep, this week.
Thank you for listening, and feel free to Kick My A$$.
S
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