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NOPE

Good. working on day 2. still need to update my blog. i will be really glad when this state audit is over next week. it's really killing me :) thanks for checking in :) xoxo

Thanks, y'all. I'm back on the train. Day 2.

Thanks for the hope, marti. You have NO idea how much it helps. I'm back on the train and using cognitive techniques (like: "I'm quit smoking" not "I'm trying to quit". Or "I'm a non-smoker".). It surely has helped today. Xoxo

NOPE

El bandito: no harm seriously. I need a reality check. I am addicted. I need help and I need people to get me out of my delusional self and into my real self which is accepting this addiction. So keep calling me out. That's one of the reasons I'm here!!! I chose to pick up. I chose to not reach out and not use my coping skills. I'm taking it minute by minute and trusting those that went before me.

Day 1 y'all! And tears eyed woman: I COMPLETELY agree. Which was all the more reason I was upset with myself and said no excuses. The one thing I dislike about AA is the normalization of smoking. I had a long talk with my sponsor about it last night bc she is of that camp ("as long as you're not drinking.....") and I told her how important it is for me to quit and how I need her support and she was very compassionate. So, I'm back on. Going for a run after work. Will keep my daily posting in blog form on here for now so that i can be held accountable. Love to you all!

Thanks, Nancy. It's all about learning from the past and my commitment issues that I've had my whole life are what I believe are holding me back. But I've committed to change before and while it was hard I did it. Yes I had some slips but I learned from each one. So I'm taking what I learned from this a picking myself back up and staring fresh.

Work and effort. And commitment. I've been think a lot today and it's my problem with commitment- I've struggled with this for year. I have to put the commitment at the forefront. It's imperative. Along with the work and effort.

I posted on my other threads that I slipped last night. Picked myself back up and recommitted today. NOPE for today. Examining the steps that led to my late night decision: lonely tired and angry about work. Still NO EXCUSES. I'm an addict. I quit drinking and I've recovered from an eating disorder and I know that I cN do this. I just know what is blocking me?

This thread has really helped me today. I had four days and slipped last night. I guess I am having a problem with commitment despite saying that I want it more than anything but something is blocking me. I know I'm impulsive, I know I'm an addict (in recovery for alcoholism and bulimia) so I don't know what's holding me back. I'm back on the train again today and will keep posting daily to hold myself accountable. I appreciate you all for being here and being supportive and helpful and for leading the way.

Well, I was doing great but I slipped :( I had four last night around midnight that I bought at the local gas station. I was hungry, angry, lonely and tired and did not use any of my coping skills. I didn't reach out on SOS. I'm an alcoholic in recovery and I REALLY wanted to drink so I reached for the cigs but NO EXCUSES. It's an addiction and I slipped but I'm back on today and I'm going to do a daily check in here so that I am held accountable. This is a life and death issue. Life will always have its stressors- it's life. Smoking is NOT an option and it made me feel like shit anyway. Xoxo

NOPE

Hi Tony- I am so new here and I'm on day 4 of my cold turkey quit. I have been a social smoker for most of my life until ~ 1 year ago when I went through marital problems and then a divorce, so I know how though times can be a huge trigger. For me, I was looking for any excuse to dull the pain and since I don't drink, nicotine was my only vice. i would imagine it would be similar with physical pain when compared with emotional pain. You can do this! Keep reaching out here. It has saved me the past few days and with so much love, encouragement and support, I don't want to smoke again. I have cravings but I know I won't die from them. I am taking this one minute at a time and you have caught me in a good minute :)

Thanks, El Bandito! Feeling pretty good today even though I am at work. It actually is a good distraction and I plan on working on my laptop once I put the littles to bed b/c night is the most difficult time- it's when I used to sit on my porch and smoke and drink tea. It helped with my loneliness as I am settling into my newly divorced status. But I have found reading on the couch and checking in here and playing with the kids in the playroom have been very good alternatives the past three nights.

thanks for the link. I think I might create my own just to help motivate me and track things, like emotions and triggers. hope y'all are having a great day!!! xoxo

No smoking for me today. NOPE

I made it through the night :) still some this morning but not as strong. Thanks for all your support! I'll keep checking in. About to drink coffee and than off the audit more charts: yippee!!!

in 3 hours. And I had a good day but ever since 5pm hit, I have been dying with cravings. I picked the kids up from daycare, dropped them off to the sitter and am now back at work until 8:30pm, getting ready for a state audit. I don't know if it is b/c I am tired, resentful, stressed, lonely......all of the above. but ALL I want to do is leave here, buy a pack of american spirits and chain smoke on my porch. I KNOW this is not the answer and since I am no longer a smoker, it is not an opton. I keep repeating that to myself and am taking it one minute at a time with deep breaths. I am y try to do some light yoga when I get home to calm my nerves. When do the cravings usually peak in withdrawal? Today is the worst they have been.

Marti- Is your blog here or separate? If not here, can you sen dme the link b/c I would love to check it out. ty xoxo

Here I am- starting Day 3. I LOVE all of your advice. I think really switiching the wording from "I am trying to quit smoking" to "I don't smoke" has made a HUGE difference. We are in the middle of a state audit at work and one of my coworkers asked if I wanted to smoke with her and I said "I don't smoke anymore". Normally, I would say "trying" and then rationalize the smoke and say something like "well, at least I am trying...I am cutting back...I will try again tomorrow". As for the withdrawal, I think I am going to have to cut back on my caffeine intake b/c I am VERY shaky this morning and I did read about the effect of nicotine with caffiene. It didn't affect me the past two days but I probably have less nicotine in my system now so I think I will try 1/2 cup tomorrow am. Less irritable today, but MAN all I did was EAT last night. Lots of sugar. I am allowing myself this until the end of today but then I am going to switch to healthy snacks b/c I really don't want to gain a ton of weight

NOPE

you all give me so much hope!

I'm going to be honest- I had a rough morning. Really bad withdrawal- restless and irritable- I was a little rough on the kids. I had a lot of stomach issues too. but I am at the half way point for the first 72 hours so maybe that is why? - 36 hours right now. I am totally commited and actually feel cognitively positive and just trying to take it one min, hour, day at a time. willing to do whatever it takes. life is too precious. also, drinking a lot of water and juice and trying to eat every few hours. I allowed myself to pig out on chik fil a and ice cream with the kids last night b/c it was a rough day at work :) Thanks for asking and for all the support. I really appreciate it.

NOPE.