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On the Edge of Relapse


IndigoChilde

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I just feel like I'm on the edge of relapse today. I keep telling myself NOPE. But it's like I want to smoke. It hasn't been this bad in a while. I don't know if it's coming off the bupropion or what. Today I just feel like crap. My run didn't go well. I mean, I still kinda made it, but it didn't go as I'd like. I didn't enjoy it at all. My dad tried to encourage me but I just couldn't get my spirits up. I can't figure anything I want to do except sleep and smoke, so I've mostly been sleeping. It's like day 1 all over again. I'm not going to smoke. I can't let myself go now. But damn do I feel like I'm heading there.

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I'm sorry that you are having a hard time. There were quite a few rough points in my quit.

I know that the last thing that you want to hear is "hold on, it passes" or "hold on, it gets better" but it really does. There are going to be periods during this journey where you are stopped in your tracks by cravings, it could be just one or a whole day of it. It can happen at a point where you thought that craving and thoughts should be over. The important thing to remember is that it does pass and a time does come where you don't even think about it, at all.

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I just saw this. Some times after the first thrill of quitting, the newness wears off and you still have craves and feel tired of holding on.  I know you are tough and the thing to do at this point is to hang on. I have heard the term "embrace the suck" which I think may be appropriate.  Work through this tough time and you will come through to the other side feeling better. 

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Keep the faith that this too shall pass. It can feel exhausting just carrying on I know, but you won't feel like this all the time. The thing with a quit is there's easier and euphoric times and harder times. It can actually switch up one day to the next and how you choose to think about it plays a part too. 

 

You're doing fab, just keep taking one step at a time. x

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