Nearly 2 months

My emotions are still up and down like a yo yo. I have smoked since I was 13 years old. My first cigarette was age 9! I am now 38, never in all my adult years have I "coped" as a non smoker. I did quit for 364 days, but I was massively protected in that time and the first real drama, I smoked again. So I will forgive myself that sometimes I don't know how to/who to be?

I feel like a child sometimes! I am now learning how to deal with my emotions. Ironically, I am teaching my 8 and 4 year old daughters how to do the same haha. I get really sad, really down but then I come bouncing back up. I will learn without smoking how to do this, how to be calm.

So the triggers are now easier but there. Only being around smokers is harder, but still, I can manage that in a dismissive way by putting my thought process together and remember one cigarette goes with 30 a day and that is DONE! However, I would be a liar if I said it didn't still exist, but it's ok and easier week by week I honestly think.

The emotions -truly a work of art/work in progress?!