Depressed (seriously), dopamine boosted by nicotine, alcohol--conflicted

[Kate18]

Now I'm more than a year and four months quit smoking. I struggle with bipolar depression. The hypomanic highs are managed well. Depression, not so much. Earlier this month I had to go off of a newer bipolar med called lurasidone.  It was causing rigid neck muscles and back spasms that put me off of work for more than twelve weeks while I had physical therapy. The physical therapy did nothing to help, but when I discovered that the lurasidone could cause back muscle spasms, and (with my doctor's blessing) went off of it, that was a game changer. Now I am back at work without problems. 

 

I have been researching what can affect serotonin and dopamine. I am seriously depressed, nihilistic. I can't take anything that attempts to modulate serotonin levels, so that leaves me with few options for antidepressants. I have been researching medications that enhance dopamine. Alcohol and nicotine are two substances that enhance dopamine in the brain. I'm already struggling with alcohol. Nicotine is more expensive, but less harmful than the alcohol I've turned to. I'm struggling against impulses to buy cigarettes to help with depression.

 

Have any of you struggled with this, or had experience with this? I'll keep researching. 

 

My psychiatrist didn't know that the lurasidone I was taking could cause serotonin syndrome--rigid neck and shoulder muscles and back spasms. I lost thousands of dollars from lost work because of back spasms. Now I'm off of the  medication, but we know that an entire class of medication is out of the question because of that toxic reaction. 

 

I am seriously considering starting smoking again because of mental health issues. Without some intervention, it is doubtful I'll make it through to next June. February and March are particularly  difficult for me. I suspect that is partially because of the low sunlight in Winter in Seattle, our latitude. My daughter wants me to move to Texas because of more sunlight in the Winter.

 

Anyone have difficulty with moods in the Winter, and anyone turned to nicotine to try to improve moods during that time? 

 

I don't want to ruin a more than 1 year and 4 months quit. I also don't want to give up on life because of an imbalance of brain chemistry when smoking could help me through the low periods.

[Angeleek]

Hi Kate!

 

I feel for you and your struggles. I was able to supplement with Vitamin D3 to help with mild depressive symptoms during the dark months. I also find that regular cardio exercise gives me a little dopamine boost and calms my anxiety at the same time. My cardio is slow jogging, brisk walking, cycling or living room dancing.

 

I find that the longer I stay off nicotine, the better I feel emotionally. One and a half years now. I am now convinced that nicotine was a source of depression and anxiety for me. But before I got better, I went through some mildly depressive months -- 4 I think.

 

Please consult your doctor and try not to relapse into using nicotine.  If you can stay off it long enough, your natural dopamine production will probably wake up.  All the best to you.  I'm rooting for ya. You CAN make it!!!

[Mee]

Kate, I can't believe there is not an alternative medicine that would help.  I think it would only add to your depression to go back to smoking.  If this doctor can't help, I would look for another.  Join a support group, check with the National Association on Mental Illness (NAMI).  When you join a group, it is an instant connection to others who might be able to share information.  Don't ever give up and don't give into the temptations of this addiction.

[Kris]

Kate, sorry to hear of your struggles, the SSRI's do not agree with me either. I have tried so many to treat my depression. I would move without some kind of confirmation that a different climate would help. I am in Texas, I have to opposite problem, I get worse in the summer because of the heat. I am over 60 and if you are young may Texas would help.  I would suggest you talk to your doctor about the special lamps that simulate sunshine. Maybe that would help and if it does you could get one to have in your home for regular use.  I would not suggest you leave your home base. friends and family without trying everything.  You may need to look for a different doctor at some point.

All that said, do not go back to smoking,

Wishing you the best...stay quit!

K

Edited July 3, 2021 by Doreensfree

[Christian99]

Abstinence is always possible and always the right choice.  

 

Christian99

19 1/2 Years Quit

[Robbie]

Kate, I felt that cigarettes lifted my mood too, but I'm convinced that it's only a 'quick fix' and that long term, cigarettes only add to one's depression. I am on anti-depressants and I pretty much cried for the first three weeks of quitting smoking, but now I find that I feel generally a lot better. Being a smoker is depressing in its self, feeling controlled by nicotine, the smell, the expense, the long term health effects etc. etc. and all those chemicals must surely mess with the brain! I am in the middle of Winter here in Australia and there isn't much sunlight so I tend to suffer from seasonal depression too. For me, I know that I would be coughing all through Winter if I was still smoking and that alone has been worth the difficulty of quitting. I hope that you can find an alternative to nicotine to lift your spirits. Try not to add to your misery by smoking again after more than one year quit! All the best.

[Kris]

Kate,

I agree that we think it is going to help. You get 10 minutes of relief and a lifetime of regret. I am struggling too, please let's do it together.

K