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Jeff ....

Never give trying to Give up ....

BKP is right though ....it's all about the attitude.....

I once said Quitting is like doing the Okey Kokey....

You have to put your whole self in ... 💯.....

It's not use being half hearted ...

I know you can do it ....you yourself have to believe you can ...then maybe you will....!!!!

 

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@JH63 I didn't want to quit I had to quit because I couldn't breathe. But I was ready to quit and I think that you're ready to quit too. That's really all you need until you get farther into your quit and see all the benefits of quitting. You've just never allowed yourself to get to that point.

These false starts are torture because every time you relapse you have to do those shitty first weeks all over again 😵

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On 4/19/2021 at 9:32 AM, JH63 said:

@Kate18  Thanks, I understand what you are saying.  I'll just keep on quitting, or stopping, and maybe something will happen in the future that causes it to stick.

I tried to just walk any from my last quit and forget about it. Take all that stress of staying quit off my mind.   It didn't work!  I just kept thinking about how I needed to not be smoking.  I started another quit three days later and I'm still struggling to keep it.  But that's nothing new to me.  Everyday is a struggle with cigarettes, quit or not.  Maybe I'll just end up having not smoked more days this year than last. Take Care!

The struggle fades after a time. I didn't think I'd ever be able to go a day without thinking about smoking, but I do. That's why I don't post NOPE pledge every morning, because smoking--or not smoking--doesn't enter my mind. 

 

I'm hoping you'll encounter your tipping point soon, your reasons to quit become stronger than the pull of addiction. It can be the result of something unexpected, so be on the alert. 

:) Have a great, smoke-free weekend!

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  • 2 weeks later...

JH !!

How you doing ....

Have you had enough of choking your lungs yet ????

You ready to take your seat ????

Come - On ....Join the Newbies ....👍

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@Doreensfree I am doing alright! I come here almost everyday and read, but don't post when I'm smoking. I smoked three days when I threw my three month quit away. Then I quit again for three weeks,then lost that also. I've been quit again for just a short time. I can't see any reason to come on here and bother people about the cycle I've been in for the last year. I've been given all the information about quitting smoking that can be given in all those old treads. I read them and I am thankful to everyone on this forum for being so helpful. It's been a full year now of 10 different quits, or stoppages.

It's all on me at this point and really always was!  I will admit that it's as hard to walk away and give up the fight, like I tried to do, as it is to try and stay quit. It's on my mind either way.

Take Care!

 

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@JH63, have you tried just coming to terms with the fact that it's going to constantly be on your mind for a while after you quit? That was my number one worse part of quitting, I was so sick of thinking about cigarettes endlessly. And then one morning I woke up in a great mood, singing in the shower and it wasn't until a few hours later that it hit me.....I hadn't thought of cigarettes! :) It was such a great feeling and it WILL happen for you too you just haven't allowed yourself to get to that point....

 

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Posted (edited)

@JH63 we are both going through this cycle. I can't speak for you but I have  come to some conclusions :


I want to quit but I keep going back to smoking. This is either because I insist on thinking about forever which is the kiss of death, or I just haven't educated myself so I am reading everything here again

 

I want the end goal but I don't want to put the work in

 

I think my addiction is 2000 times worst than anyone else's so they don't get how hard this is to do

 

My life is crap at the moment and the stress of quitting is just too much right now

 

Do you see the common thread there? That's right, I'm just talking a load of bullshit. It's the sort of thing continual relapsers come out with. It's always me me me with an addict but until we want to help ourselves nobody else can help us.

 

We hide from the forum not because we are ashamed, but because we want the freedom to throw away our quits without a big fanfare. 

 

We have been given a thousand chances to quit smoking and hopefully save our lives. That isn't what us addicts do though. We would rather wait until we are in a hospital bed begging God to let us live and making promises to him to quit straight away. The sickest part of that is if we were given our chance then it would only be a matter of time before we were lighting up again.

 

I hope all of us relapsers cross the line to quitters because smoking really is like Russian Roulette

Edited by Lilley
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As Jill has said ...

Smoking is always going to be on your mind ....

It's on mine ...I'm here every day talking about smoking ...

It's what you do with those thoughts that count .....

I've lost count of all my failed attempts to quit in my 52 years smoking career....

But I never gave up trying ..

It wasn't until I put my whole self into the last quit ...not just half hearted that I succeeded.....

We will always be here ...when your ready ....

Don't leave it until it's too late ...

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Posted (edited)

@Lilley Thanks, If you ever figure out how to get out of your cycle please let me know.

 

  I don't know how to not think about quitting all the time. Distractions help me some, but I still have to face this even after the distraction has done it's job.

 

The biggest stressor in my life is my inability to manage this addiction. I'm lucky in a way, I am not under much stress.  I don't think that my addiction is any different than anyone else's. Mine's not worse than others here. My ability to manage my addiction is where I am different from others who have succeeded at quitting smoking.  I know that I am not alone. 

 

That only leaves one thing that you mentioned, "I want the end goal but I don't want to put the work in". Sounds right for me.

Take Care!

Edited by JH63
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6 minutes ago, JH63 said:

The percentage of people who join, quit, and then just disappear is much higher than the ones who stay and actually quit. Most didn't get struck in this cycle like we are in. They either quit or give up.

 

You shouldn't use that as a determining factor of whether someone stayed quit or not Jeff. I've joined several forums, not smoking related, this past year of being homebound and after perusing them decided they weren't for me for one reason or another.

As far as people disappearing here, you will find if you stay long enough that a good majority do end up returning when they are finally ready to quit for good. And some people just find that a forum isn't the right fit for them and they rather do it without the support and that's ok too :) 

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